Name: David Nichtern | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes
Uploaded: 2023-09-06T19:00:06.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'David Nichtern | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes' from Pete Holmes on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-09-06. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'David Nichtern | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes' from Pete Holmes on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-09-06. Transcript available.

David Nichtern | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes

You made it weird. You made it weird. You made it weird. Oh, yeah. You made it
weird. You made it weird. Yes, you did. You made it weird. Oh, yeah. You made
it weird. With Pete Holmes. Yes, you did. You made it weird. Oh, yeah.
What's happening, weirdos? This is the incredible return of the incredible
David Nickturn, who is a great teacher of mine, a great friend of mine, a
wonderful Buddhist, and a very wise and funny person.
And I'm so glad you guys are here to check him out. If you want more David Nickturn
after you listen to this, and chances are you might, you very well might, go to
dharmamoon.com.
That's his organization, d-h-a-r-m-a-m-o-o-n.com, dharmamoon.com.
And you will see a link there for their 100-hour mindfulness meditation teacher
training with David Nickturn.
Val has done it. It's incredible. He's incredible. You're about to hear.
Hopefully, you heard the first chat.
If you didn't, David and I met at the Ram Dass retreat in Maui, and we had
breakfast together, and we ended up talking so long,
we ended up having lunch together at the same table, because he's just a wealth
of information and just a calming, wonderful presence in my life, and I'm happy
to share that with you guys today.
Not much to plug up top other than dharmamoon.com. I do want to say I'll be on
the road when this comes out.
I'm actually today heading to St. Louis, so go to petehomes.com if you want to
see me in St. Louis.
See you in St. Louis. And then the weekend after that, I'll be in Salt Lake
City. There's more dates being added.
If you just saw me, I'm doing a new hour. I'm taking a new hour out, and I'm so
thrilled with it, and it is so fun.
So I'll be adding even more dates for the tour. We're calling it the Feeling It
Tour.
This is the tail end of the Where Were We Tour for St. Louis and Salt Lake City.
But all those dates will be at petehomes.com. Check it out. Hope to see you on
the road. Always means a lot.
Go to largo-la.com for my monthly show in Los Angeles. The last one was so fun.
Kumail was on it. It was so cool.
Check that out. It's once a month. largo-la.com. There's definitely one in
October. I'm just blanking.
It's on a weekend, I'm sure. A weekend in October. Largo-la.com.
And we're brought to you by our friends today at Onnit Alpha Brain. I was just
packing my bag to go on the road.
Alpha Brain is such a huge, huge part of my life. Actually, I did a show at
Dynasty Typewriter last night,
and someone had me autograph their Alpha Brain bottle, which I thought was
hilarious and wonderful.
And they knew I would appreciate that. I just packed up. I was putting my Alpha
Brain black label in the bag.
It's a tight bag. I travel with one backpack. Not a lot of room in there, but I
never, never, never don't travel pretty much anywhere without Alpha Brain.
It's in my car. It's in my travel bag. It's in the pockets of my jackets. What
is it? It's a nootropic.
What's that? It's earth-grown ingredients that help you concentrate, help you
focus, help you dial in.
It helps your brain work. It's not a stimulant. It's not like caffeine. It
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if you need to do stand-up, if you need to do a podcast, or if you just need
your brain functioning clearly and well,
Alpha Brain 15, 20 minutes before you do that task makes a huge noticeable
difference. It is a game changer in my life.
I wish I knew about it in college. I'm so glad I know about it now. Give it a
try. Support your brain, and you'll be supporting this show.
Go to onnit.com slash weird. You'll get 10% off everything you see on that
landing page, and those sales help support the show,
helps keep the lights on here. We appreciate that. Oh, keep your lights on.
Keep your brain running smooth.
I take it constantly before every show, before I sit down at my desk, onnit, alphabrain,
onnit.com slash weird.
All right, everybody. Hope to see you in St. Louis. Hope to see you in Salt
Lake City. Enjoy David Nickturn.
Go to dharmamoon.com. Get meditation, mindfulness training from the man. He's
incredible. Get into it.
Can you hear me? Can you hear me? Yeah. Wow. Seamless.
Yeah. Seemingly seamless. Seemingly seamless. Same root. What is that? Yeah. Seeming
seamless. No, it's not. It's S-E-A-M.
Shit. The second one is seam. Yeah. There's two different things, but they both
have to do with apparent reality.
Seems make it look like two things are attached that aren't. So, seams make it
seem, is what you're saying.
As if it's seamless.
I'm so happy to see you. Sorry. I didn't want to interrupt. I'm just, this is
the welcome. I'm just saying I'm so thrilled to have a little time with you.
It's one of the great joys of my life that this podcast provides these excuses
to hang out. You know what I'm saying?
Yeah. And it didn't even exist like 10 years ago, right?
I know. And I think people would say that, oh, that's when we were in coffee
shops and talking.
And I'm like, I don't think so. I think we're talking more now than ever.
I think all of these things that are internet, whatever, supposedly driving us
apart are actually doing the opposite. I think I'm talking way more to people
than I ever have.
Well, yeah. And it's a certain aspect that communication is heightened by it,
don't you think? Haven't you found that?
That's the whole thing. We're cooking over a spit right now. The flame of
urgency. Well, you know Val and I do the Friday episodes. And I'm like, it's
one of the keys to a healthy relationship is having nice, long conversations
once a week.
But I would add to that if you record them and you release them, there's an
urgency. So why do you go to a date? Why do you wear a suit? Why do you go to a
white tablecloth restaurant? It's to add a little performance to it. Meaning it's
not just for show people.
Valentine's Day is an open mic for regular folks. You go out and you do a song
and dance. Look at what we're wearing. Look at how we're behaving. How much are
we laughing? How much are we touching? All that sort of stuff doesn't make it
false or wrong.
But human beings tend to do better when other human beings are observing them.
You know what I'm saying?
Well, and there's also getting rousing something.
Yes.
Which is probably the essence of decorum and things like that, where you create
not a superficial outer shell, but a kind of level of expression that's related
to how others are connecting with you.
It's not this kind of hyper casual and, you know, clueless kind of vibe.
It's like the stage is set. The table is set.
And that's our whole look. When I was a kid, I went through a real Holden Caulfield
period where I was like, oh, grownups are so phony and they talk. You know what
I mean? I do hate when people talk like they're on a conference call, even
though they're not on a conference call.
You know what I mean? They're like, well, that's great, Jim. Like we're in line
at a coffee. And they're like, well, yeah, let's circle back to that. And, you
know, let me jump off here. I'm going to talk. I'm like, why are you talking?
Because you've been so corporatized that you can't even talk to me as a person.
I hate that. So it can be perverted and taken to an extreme, but there's
something fun. It's a wedding. It's a, it's going to a court to contest a
ticket. There's a drama to it. There's a judge, there's pillars, there's marble,
even, you know, firefighters and, and, and EMTs.
We, we, we created all of this meaning. So we're not just kind of like running
around in the woods and, and there's a way to enjoy it. It's fun to be talking
to you now, as I talk, I don't, five minutes ago, I wasn't talking at this
register.
I'm turning it on, baby. And it's fun to turn it on.
And this is exactly where I thought we'd get to today, which is the vertical
and the horizontal.
Beautiful. You, you Buddhist master, just do it.
And apparent reality and the sort of more unconditional quality of how things
actually are. So it's how they are and how they appear, which is in every
spiritual tradition.
You'll find this, um, expressed some way or another. Um, and the tension
between those two things.
Yes. Which means, uh, you go to church on Sunday, but on Monday, you're
actually, uh, donate, you know, you're helping people out in the food kitchen.
You're, um, you know, helping an old woman across the street and, uh, you know,
how, um, it's interesting.
And, you know, me, I always connected just because that's my tradition to the,
uh, Buddhist and particularly Tibetan Buddhist perspective is it's called Dundam
and Kunsa.
And Dundam is absolute reality, unconditional, just the way it is. You know,
you don't have to do anything.
It's just kind of intact. And Kunsa is relative reality. And it literally means
all dressed up. It's just what you were just talking about.
No way. Kunsa is all dressed up, all dressed up. Whoa, you, you recognize that.
Yes, you do put on the suit, you do put on a tuxedo to go to the Academy Awards
or whatever it is.
And you do put on a tie to meet your girlfriend's parents, uh, even though you're,
you know, that's not your style and you do, um, you know, um, set the table
nicely for people to come, even though they're, they're just your friends.
They're the same idiots and jerks you were having coffee with two days ago, but
now we're putting out the cutlery. Yes. Because that's Kusa. Kunza. Kunza. Yeah.
Yeah. All dressed up. And, um, but recognizing that it's empty.
So the difference in the kind of, in the materialistic world, you don't
recognize the emptiness of it, right? It just seems like this is it. This is
what's important. This is the final answer.
And in the sort of spiritual domain, you don't really give any credence to the
kind of, uh, relative unfolding of reality and, and, and small relational
things that happen during a day.
Right. But in a, in another way you could integrate those two so that you can
get fully involved and engaged in the play that you're in, but you, you never
have mistaken it for any kind of absolute reality.
Because that would cause you, I mean, that would make you pain. It would make
you paranoid. It would make you depressed, jealous. If this is all there is.
Yes. Jealous bubbling with competition and jealousy.
This is so great because I wanted to talk about what you wanted to talk about.
And I texted you and you said, this is what you wanted to talk about. And this
is what I wanted to talk about.
Cause if you remember like a week, of course you do a week or two ago, I called
you as I do, uh, when I'm having a little crisis, I'm not having a crisis today.
I feel fantastic today.
So I'm trying to honor crisis Pete and remember him, but crisis Pete, cause it
was serious right now. I'm like whistling. I'm just like, what was that all
about?
But there are people listening that are, that may be feeling this, which is, I
was starting to panic. I was getting a little too close to what I would
consider ultimate reality. Meaning you even hear this in the Christian
tradition. I was getting it from a course in miracles, but I'm also reading
James Finley's book. And he talks about how God alone is real.
Like everything else is sort of like a play or a dance. It doesn't have to be
nefarious, but it's not real. And you can even look at it scientifically. You
could go, it's all molecules. It's all atoms. You can do it from wherever you
want to stand. And you go like, but it seems like it's a shirt, you know?
And I was starting to panic. Cause I was like, what about, I was getting too
much of, well, the way it was manifesting and we can get to this in a moment,
but I'll load it into you as I was like, if God alone is real and God is
perfect oneness, God doesn't even know about this world, which in, in, in the
way that we think of knowing, you know what I mean?
Like subject to object, God is over here in heaven and he's watching me and
David have a conversation