Name: Shane Torres | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes
Uploaded: 2024-02-14T15:00:18.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Shane Torres | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes' from Pete Holmes on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-02-14. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Shane Torres | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes' from Pete Holmes on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-02-14. Transcript available.

Shane Torres | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes

You made it weird, you made it weird, yes you did, you made it weird, yeah, you
made it weird, you made it weird, you made it weird, yes you did, you made it
weird, yeah.
What's happening weirdos? This is the return of the incredible Shane Torres who
has a new special out on YouTube for free right now called Blue-Eyed Mexican.
It is hilarious, he is a true master of his craft, I loved this special, I
watched it in part but I also listened to it in my car without looking at the
screen obviously, meaning enjoy it however you can, you can listen to it, you
can watch it, it works either way, it's fantastic, he's so silly, he's so funny
and he's so good.
And this conversation was a joy, just effortless flow, did we just become best
friends, energy, and you know I love those kind of episodes so I'm so glad you
guys are here.
Check that out on YouTube, just come see me on the road on PeteHolmes.com,
those are the tour dates.
I'm most excited about May 4th, the Netflix is a joke fest, come out to that if
you're going to be in LA in May, and in the meantime there are all my Largo
shows, the 17th I think, yeah the 17th is my next Largo date, and all the tour
dates are on PeteHolmes.com.
In the meantime, so glad you're here, let's listen to Shane Torres Returns, get
into it.
What neighborhood did you guys move to?
We live in Ojai, do you know Ojai?
That's like the kind of beachy town?
I thought you were going to say something funny, I was just listening to you,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I thought you were going to make fun of me, I
thought you were going to make fun of me.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I thought you were going to delight me.
You saying, I thought you were going to say something funny, it's so bad.
No, no, I guess when you say it, you're worried people are going to be like, oh
that like crunchy, hippie piece of shit or something.
Oh really, is that like, does it have that narrative for some people?
Maybe, here's what's happening, is I listened to your special this morning and
I fucking loved it.
Thanks man, you're the one.
I keep track of every listen.
Get a nice little dopamine hit individually.
Yeah, that's right, find them.
Drive to every commenter's house and just shake your hand.
But what happens, and this happens sometimes on this show, is if I'm not binging,
but I just finished it, and now I'm talking to you, so I think I'm almost like
an idiot where I'm like, oh here he goes, here he goes.
You like, you see me as the performer, like, I mean, yeah.
I was just watching that version of you.
I was, well that's so funny you said that, because I was doing that, because
when I was outside of the place and I was commenting on the yard, I was like,
oh, they must be having so much fun.
Like with like all the toys in the yard and everything.
And then you're like, you don't even live here anymore.
Yeah, that's not our stuff.
Yeah, so I'm just some guy who's looking at some stranger's place.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, like just some lonely bastard holding pastries.
I'm here.
Did you, I hope this isn't annoying, but it's really, I'm complimenting a line.
We're going.
Yeah, yeah, 100%.
Yeah, by the way, you like.
Tell me.
It looks great in here since the last time I was here.
Oh, thanks.
Yeah, yeah, like I like all the artwork, and that's maybe one of my all-time
favorite bands.
Me too.
Wait, bands?
National.
Yeah.
I thought you were pointing at the Drive painting.
Oh, the Drive is wonderful.
I love movies, but the National is my favorite band.
Yeah, I love them so much.
Yeah, they're...
Why are we so sad?
Because we were husky?
I still am.
Like, I think that's part of it, a lot of it for me.
Yeah.
I think huskiness.
Yeah.
Outsideness.
Yeah, and do you find you gravitate to that feeling just generally?
I love it.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's a weird, comfortable neighborhood for me.
Yeah, I think it's familiar is what it is.
It's familiar.
I'm trying to...
Did you watch Tony Robbins on Theo Vaughn by any chance?
No, I missed.
Wow.
I didn't know that.
This is the world we're living in.
That wasn't fed to you?
Yeah.
That didn't come through your algorithm like it's network TV?
Yeah, like it's bananas that that's...
Did that happen?
Yes.
I agree.
And it's been, what, I think maybe five years since I did this podcast?
Yes.
Yeah, maybe less.
Who knows?
Yeah.
If we would have said that as a joke and not a possibility five years ago.
Well, Neil Brennan won with the joke where he goes, if you would have told me
ten years
ago that the president would be the host of The Apprentice and the most
influential person
in the world would be the host of Fear Factor, I was just like, wow, you're
absolutely right.
Like things are changing rapidly.
It's, I don't like it.
And it's like, and it's not just people like, I'm not, like, I do not like that
the Obamas
have an overall deal at Netflix.
They do?
Yeah, they have a production company.
Yeah, it's like, or they have a production.
Like, I don't think that's what a president and, and also I'm wrong, you know,
like I know
that it has nothing to do with anything, you know, but I just, I'm just like,
does everyone
need to be a celebrity now?
Or like, well, that's what it is.
I was just talking.
And it's an easy way to make money, I guess, for them.
Well, I think.
Compared to running the free world.
Not enough attention there.
We've got to circle back.
That is crazy that like, they're like, I'm not ready to shine out the spotlight
yet.
I'm going to have a podcast with Bruce Springsteen.
I did the voice of the E-Trade baby and I just found out that they're doing new
ones.
And I did it last year.
Are you doing it?
But they're not using me because they're re-scrapping it.
Who's got it?
I don't know.
Birbiglia?
Another guy from Boston?
I was told that they want to do it more on the cheap.
And when you do it for a long time, the number keeps going on.
And I completely understand.
Yeah, and it was like, whatever, it's a great opportunity that kept you fed.
Yeah, absolutely.
And I had to have a moment of like, that's okay.
Someone else should have that job.
You know what I mean?
Yes.
I'm not virtue-
I never have that moment, ever.
What do you mean?
I do not have that moment.
You want to cut off a head.
Yeah, I just, I've never had a job in comedy outside of comedy.
Not one.
Yeah.
You know, like outside of being a-
You're like Gary Goleman.
Have you heard his bit about that?
Was it on the new special?
I don't know, because I haven't seen it, but I saw it live.
The new special is-
Incredible.
There is like great stuff in it.
I believe it.
Yeah.
I messaged him and he was really sweet.
Well, tell me if he said this.
You don't have to.
Go on.
Be my Google.
But he was on a show and it was me and it was Judd and it was all these other
people.
And he was doing really, really well.
Of course he was.
And he goes, see, see, see, this is all I have.
That's why I'm better than all these people.
He's like, they all have movies and TV shows.
He's like, this is all I do.
And he's like, that's what, yeah.
And he goes, you're welcome.
And I was like, that is the funniest flip.
Yeah.
And also like still a dig for him.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like.
What do you mean a dig?
Oh, then he's like, I don't have stuff.
Yes.
Yeah.
And also a way for him to be like, fuck everyone at this.
But it's what comedy can be.
Yes.
It's so helpful.
It's this delightful moment.
And it is true.
Do you, you find when you're doing all these other things, not that your standup
suffers,
but that it's like inevitable that it takes a step back or like.
Well, it's interesting.
Because I worry about that when I even begin to think about trying to get.
I wouldn't worry.
I wouldn't worry about it.
How long have you been doing it?
Not to diagnose you, but you've been doing it a while.
It'll be.
God damn it.
God.
17 years next year.
Yeah.
That's what I was going to guess around about.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And in the 15 to 20 range.
Yeah.
But I'm a weird, I don't know if I'm, I think I'm a weird creature when it
comes to standup.
Meaning I like to do it actually as little as possible.
So it's still exciting.
Meaning like my appropriate, like I did Largo last night.
I loved it.
It's the funnest.
Was it your show or was it?
It was my show.
Yeah.
And I hadn't done standup in, well, it had been weeks and weeks.
And I loved it.
That's great.
And I loved it.
Because so much of my juggle, this is my point.
Let me bring it back to you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Please, please.
Sorry.
When I listen to you, I go, that's the guy that's doing it all the time.
That doesn't mean I wish that I was that way, but I'm hearing the polish on you
and it's
really fucking good.
Thanks, man.
You miss no opportunity.
I think on this one I did pretty well.
You miss no opportunity.
Thank you.
Yeah, you know what I mean?
Yeah.
If there's a joke or a moment and you season it, sorry, we're just going to
step out and
compliment City here, but like you season it with the right-
Population me.
Well, let's look at it like a meal, right?
But you do give it the right variety of flavors, meaning, oh, now he's being
silly.
Yeah, I tried to like-
Like you sang a little song about eating in the bed.
And now he's being like really mean, but like not-
Did I do the nurses thing in that?
No, no, no.
I don't mean-
I don't think anyone would know you're being really mean, but I'm going like,
oh, the heart
of this is actually pretty mean.
Like you're making fun of the guy that you're checking in the hotel.
I'm like, you're just making fun of-
You call someone a primate?
I'm like, wow.
Wow.
Like, it's mean.
But when I'm eating-
I think I was watching Dennis Miller or something and I used that kind of
language.
There's no hidden criticism here.
Oh, no.
I'm eating a meal and I'm like, oh, it was spicy.
Oh, sweet.
I didn't think the little-
They sent out this amuse-bouche and it was spicy and that's entertainment.
It's surprising.
So like I saw the polish.
I just like-
And then I'll put- I'm really saying this only to put it back to you, is like
the first
10 years was like, I perform constantly and then the next five was like a
little bit less.
And now that I'm over 20 years doing it, I respect the amount that when I do it
and then
I don't do it for like- I was just shooting something, so that's why I was
taking a break.
Yeah, yeah, no.
But if I do a set and then I won't do a set the next night.
Let's say I have Largo on Thursday.
I'll do a set on Monday to like-
You're just still like-
Get wet.
Like to, yeah, to stay in the gym, essentially.
Yeah, to stay in the gym.
Yeah.
But then I like Tuesday, Wednesday off.
Yeah.
And then if I do Thursday and somebody's like-
Productive gym week, yeah.
I loved it.
So like twice a week is very good for me and I love it.
And that's pretty ideal for me.
That's valid.
But yeah, and I think the further you go along, obviously like you have a
greater skill set
and know how to maneuver in comedy, but like in those early years, you have to
be upset.
Obsessive.
Oh my God.
Like, oh, you won't get good.
Yeah, yeah.
You won't be good enough to set yourself apart.
I've said this a million times, it's stupid, but in Collateral, do you remember
the movie
Collateral?
Do I watch it almost nightly?
It's so good.
Michael Mann is my favorite.
Your line, Al Pacino is like a purse left on the subway.
This is a great example.
I'm done.
This is what I mean when you don't miss an opportunity.
If you just said, have you seen Al Pacino?
Old guys get weird when they're single and you go, have you seen Al Pacino
lately?
Sorry, I'm doing your joke to you, but he looks like a purse left on the subway.
And I'm like, I'm done.
That's great.
And then you say the next part.
I can't even remember what it is.
It's something like his contents are, he's been rummaged through, ransacked,
and his contents
are everywhere.
Yeah.
Sorry, I couldn't wait to say it.
And I was like, I was already laughing at a purse on the subway, just kind of
old and
leathery.
But then you were like, no, he can't keep it toge