Name: Judy Greer | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes
Uploaded: 2024-05-29T15:00:27.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Judy Greer | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes' from Pete Holmes on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-05-29. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Judy Greer | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes' from Pete Holmes on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-05-29. Transcript available.

Judy Greer | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes

What is happening weirdos? This is the incredible, talented, hilarious Judy Greer.
I'm so glad she is here. I'm so glad you guys are here. What isn't Judy Greer
in?
It would be faster to list the movies and TV shows she hasn't been on. She's
been in so many things.
You might know her from 13 Going on 30, Arrested Development, Adaptation.
I think I find out on air that she was in War of the Planet of the Apes. We
talk a little bit about that.
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes. She's incredible. The Wedding Planner? Come on.
It's Judy Greer, everybody.
We also just did a movie together in Winnipeg called The Best Christmas Pageant
Ever, and that'll be out next year.
We talk a little bit about that as well, but she's a delight. We had such a fun
time doing that movie together.
We became fast friends, and this conversation is certainly an example of our
friendship.
It was so fun. I'm glad you guys are here.
PeteHolmes.com for my tour dates. I'm going to Texas, and Pennsylvania are the
next ones.
Thank you to everybody that came out to Chicago. I just got home.
Those were awesome shows, six incredible shows, so hope to see you guys out
there.
Also, June 1st, it's going to be me, Judd Apatow, and Otsuko are doing Largo.
Go to Largo-LA.com. Other special guests will be on that show as well, so hope
you can be there.
That's it. All right. Judy Greer, get into it.
I want to eat some of them.
Sit down, Judy.
This is for you. You get a Magic Mind and a Vita Coco, and some women I know
use Modern Mammals.
It's a shampoo for boys.
I don't like that.
You don't?
All right.
Well, you looked at it.
Well, because I thought I'd put it in my mouth.
Use the microphone.
I thought I'd put that in my mouth, and that's why I was...
You can eat it.
No.
No.
Because Dean Johnson's husband bought the vitamin C that you eat.
You mean the goo?
Yeah.
The vitamin C.
I did goos.
I think Dean Johnson's husband and I might be kind of similar dudes.
You guys are so similar.
Are we?
Yeah.
Oh, that's wonderful.
You didn't think so?
He said to say hi.
No, I love Dean Johnson's husband.
Are we currently making a podcast?
We are.
Seamless.
Well, the reason I love that...
Well, you love your husband, Dean Johnson.
Pinky up, like Good Will Hunting.
Love.
Beers and Good Will Hunting.
You got a gift none of us have.
You're sitting on a winning lottery ticket.
You're too much of a pussy to cash it in.
Oh, my God.
Pinky up.
One of my favorite movies.
It's a great movie.
Of all time.
Holds up.
It's one of the reasons.
Are you ready?
Who cares?
It's one of the reasons I left Boston.
You need to see a movie to know you can leave Boston.
I'm going to say that.
Really?
Yes!
Otherwise, you don't think you can leave Boston?
Well, there's so many movies about leaving Boston.
Or getting killed in Boston.
You either die in Boston or you leave.
Yeah, you leave or you die.
That's our official...
And definitely, definitely you're white.
Well, I hear you.
I don't see a lot of...
There's a lot of black people.
There's a lot of brown people.
Not represented in the films.
No, no, no.
If there's a movie, it's Ben Affleck.
No, if there's a movie, it's Ben Affleck.
Huge Indian, East Asian population.
I have a Boston story that makes me very happy.
I can't wait.
I'm still...
I'm not quite done laughing at my observation that you need to watch a movie to
know you can
leave.
I blocked out that you are from Boston.
Yeah, I have a non-regional accent.
I was in Boston once, visiting friends, and husband and I were walking home
late one night
and there was a bar that was still open.
Not a shock.
And we went in.
The bartender was closing up.
We were like, hey, can we get two more beers?
And he was like, yeah, sure.
So, he pours us two...
Yeah, sure.
Yeah, sure.
Yeah, sure.
Gives us two Guinness, obviously.
And then I was like, hey, can I play a song on the jukebox?
And he goes, anything but Journey.
So, why do you have it on the jukebox?
That's all I want to know.
I just thought that was a really funny...
Because I was like, of course, everyone in Boston goes in.
Probably, I was staying in a stupid part of town and goes and plays that
Journey song.
What Journey song?
The Journey song.
About Boston?
I don't even think it's about Boston.
It just feels Boston-y.
Don't Stop Believin'?
Yes.
Don't Stop Believin' feels Boston?
Yeah.
You think Cleveland doesn't get excited for Don't Stop Believin'?
Everyone gets excited about that song, but I don't know.
To me, I just imagine...
It was just like the bartender...
I guess if this had happened in any city, I'd be like, I have the funniest
story about Cleveland.
Yeah.
But it just felt like a place where assholes go in...
Can I swear on our podcast?
Yeah.
Assholes go in and they...
Dig holes come out.
And dick holes.
You go in an asshole, you come out a dick hole.
And probably just get drunk and play...
Journey?
I think everyone thinks when they play it that it's the first time it's been
played.
Don't Stop Believin'?
Yeah.
Because people are drunk.
Otherwise, you would never play that song.
Boston, though, we love...
I can't say we love, but I'll say as a city.
Sweet Caroline by Neil Diamond?
That's just another Don't Stop Believin'.
Yeah.
It's the same kind of thing.
I don't know.
There's something about...
They love it.
Dirty Water?
I don't think of that as like a bar drinking song.
I think of it as like a wedding party song.
Well, it's a big Red Sox.
They play it at Fenway Park.
Who cares?
Sweet Caroline?
I think it's in...
Yeah.
Why?
What did I just drink?
It's matcha.
I gave you those on set.
No, you never did.
I sure did.
Don't remember.
Because you were like, why are you always...
What set?
How do we know each other?
Hey, Krasinski.
Don't make me Krasinski.
You and I met at a steakhouse and you're a vegetarian.
I'm a vegan again, by the way.
Who cares?
Wait, I care.
That's all I want to talk about.
Tell me everything.
No, that's boring.
Everyone's turning on this podcast to hear Judan Greer.
That's not how you say my name.
Judan.
What's your real name?
That's how you say my name.
Judith.
Yeah, but what is your full name?
Well, I don't want everyone to know.
It's on your Wikipedia.
Who cares?
Judith Farts.
Well, my birth name, Judith Farts Evans.
Evans?
Judith Therese Evans was my...
Judith Therese Evans put down that crossbow.
Get over here right now.
You get over here.
Did you get a Judith Therese Evans when you were in trouble?
I think I got a Judith Therese.
Judith Therese doesn't roll off the tongue.
Judy Greer.
Judy Greer.
So you've been in 100,000 movies.
Is that why?
Because you changed it to Judy Greer?
By the way, no joke.
How has your success...
How has your success been marginalized?
Because I was saying that as a joke, but do people do that?
Do people...
Because you've been in 100,000 things in one of the hardest jobs.
Yeah.
In the world.
I know.
Do people ever go like, well, she's got a great website.
Like, are there ways that people write it off?
Oh.
Like as silly as, well, her name is Judy Greer.
People just like saying Judy Greer.
I'm such a woman that I didn't even totally understand the term marginalized.
Yeah, you guys just know it as reality.
We just know it as like getting up in the morning and going to my car.
Like having my marginalized coffee, walking to my marginalized car.
Right.
Do I feel...
No.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't feel that way.
I don't feel like that.
I feel like kind of supported by people.
By the industry?
I don't...
Yeah.
Well, you are an industry...
I mean, I'm not...
I don't...
Yeah, I do.
You're a darling.
Say it.
America's best friend.
Judy Greer, America's best friend, which is from Family Guy.
Is it?
Yeah, that's the joke.
That's right.
It is.
And like also my husband says...
He used to say that I wasn't America's sweetheart.
I was America's best friend.
No, that's true.
Well, you have a Hanks equality.
Aw.
Well, let me finish.
People don't necessarily want to...
Fuck.
Fuck Tom Hanks.
I'm not saying that about you.
That I don't want to fuck Tom Hanks?
He does.
I feel comfortable.
I'm so glad you did a riff because I hate the area we're in.
Let's get out.
I abhor the area that we're in.
Come over here.
Because I don't like implying that you're not sexy, but I also don't want to
say that you
are.
Look, I'm not even looking at you right now.
I know, but here.
Come back.
Come back.
I'm not even looking at you.
Come back.
I have a funny story.
I have a funny story.
Okay.
I'm back.
I'm back.
I'm back.
I hated every part of that.
I know.
So I did this movie.
I did this movie called...
And I loved this movie.
I did this movie called Driven.
It was about...
Drive?
Driven.
Oh.
See, we'd already done Drive.
We were Driven.
Oh, you were in Drive?
No.
Oh, it's the sequel to Drive.
Driven.
Prequel?
We've Driven.
Driven is the making of Drive.
It was called...
Now I don't even know.
Was it called Driven?
It was about...
Drivel.
It was called Driven.
It was about that car...
Jeremy Driven?
That...
Jeremy Driven had a cold and he had to drop out of Driven.
The car...
The Del...
Not Dalmatian.
Del...
Delorean.
Delorean...
This is all coming back to the sexy thing.
Little Cybertruck.
Look away again.
I'm going to talk about...
The DeLorean.
Yes.
But the director was telling me...
He was like...
This wasn't even that long ago that we shot this movie.
And he was like,
I want to be the one to show America that you're actually sexy.
By the way, I loved him.
And I...
It's like...
I feel like...
I don't get...
I don't feel like I get marginalized.
But I feel like people talk to me like,
I'm going to make...
I want to be the one to give you a leading role.
Or I'm going to make America think you're sexy.
Or I'm going to show people what you're really...
Like how great you really are and stuff like that.
And sometimes I'm like,
I'm good.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And also it's like implying like...
I know.
Wow, thank you so much.
Judy, I'm going to take you out of the gutter.
Yeah.
You are underappreciated.
I know that everyone thinks that you're like a demon person,
like a garbage person,
like that you're gross and you look like an art teacher.
But I'm going to be the one to show America
and potentially other foreign countries.
Well, yeah, hopefully foreign markets.
I'm not going to leave out there.
Because those are huge.
You can.
Sleepover vibes.
Well, I know,
but it's not as comfortable as I anticipated it being.
It's kind of museum-y.
Yeah.
Like I'm interviewing a sculpture.
Anyway, that was funny when he said that.
Because I was like, hmm.
Yeah, he said he was going to show America that you're sexy.
Yeah.
But what I was going at was,
sex appeal aside,
T. Hanks, Judy Greer,
best buds.
They got the bud vibe.
Never met him.
But yes, we do.
We are best buds.
And the thing is like...
Never met Hanks?
I had that card.
What about Hanks?
I sent that card to so many people.
Did you see the card?
Where it just says Hanks?
Well, it says T and then Hanks.
It has a picture of Tom Hanks.
It's a drawing of him.
It's a thank you note.
And they were like selling it in like card shops and stuff.
Yeah.
Without his consent, I'm sure.
You big Colin Hanks guy?
Yes.
I said it loaded.
You big Colin Hanks guy?
No, I love Colin Hanks.
Yeah, of course.
He's great.
He is.
Orange County?
Great film.
But I know it's...
Is it?
I don't often get to the movies.
Can you open that?
This is why we marginalize you guys.
You can't twist the little...
I can.
It's just like I thought I was going to be sitting at a desk with headphones on.
I wouldn't have come in with a wet head.
Because honestly, I thought the headphones would train my wet curly hair to dry
and now I don't
know what's going to happen.
You train it?
Curly hair needs to be trained.
That's a thing?
Mm-hmm.
Is that why you guys sit in those bulbous glass bulbs?
No, that's to get away from men.
Whoa!
Hot take.
That's for a different reason.
Yeah, hot take.
Do you prefer women to men?
I don't mean sexually.
I just mean like, do you like the company of women?
Because w