Name: Kyle Kinane | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes #podcast
Uploaded: 2024-07-31T15:00:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Kyle Kinane | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes #podcast' from Pete Holmes on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-07-31. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Kyle Kinane | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes #podcast' from Pete Holmes on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-07-31. Transcript available.

Kyle Kinane | You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes #podcast

You made it weird. Yes, you did. You made it weird. You made it weird with Pete
Holmes.
Yes, you did. You made it weird.
What's happening, weirdos? This is the return of my dear friend, the lovely
Kyle Kinane,
who I have known for well over a decade. He is hilarious. He has a new special
called Dirt Nap,
which is available in its entirety on YouTube.com. So check that out. He is so
funny. He is so
wonderful. And I enjoyed this chat even more than the first time he was on,
which was about 10 years
ago. My goodness. So I'm so glad Kyle is back. Hope to see you guys out on the
road. I am touring.
Kyle is also touring. Go to kylekinane.com for his tour dates. If you'd like to
see me,
I'm going to be in Madison this weekend, followed by Pittsburgh, Buffalo, New
York,
Milwaukee, and then Denver. All of those are available at PeteHolmes.com. And
in the meantime,
enjoy this chat with the wonderful, the hilarious, the one of a kind, Kyle Kinane.
Get into it.
I was walking in and I saw a guy named Joe, who is now in a very famous band
called Rise Against,
but it was in bands I saw as a teenager and we know each other. And I was like,
wait a minute,
what? Like, we'd like, like, go to- Wait, is he a Chicago guy? Yeah.
I'm waiting for this to become Chicago. Randomly here on the street in Los Feliz,
talking about like, like, oh yeah, we know each other from punk rock. And I was
like,
isn't it sad? Steve Albini died today. So. Who's Steve Albini? That will get
your ass kicked in
Chicago. But I don't live in Chicago. He's a, he's like a very, yeah, I know.
It doesn't matter
anymore. He's a very famous producer, like famous, like punk producer. Like any,
Nirvana and all
these bands. Which Nirvana record? I don't know. I'm not a huge Nirvana fan. We're
both in trouble.
Yeah. Huge producer. Are we rolling? Is it a rolling start? Yeah, but we can
start one,
like we can cut that out. What are these? Do I have one of these? Yeah, that's
for you. Do you
want a cold one? It is cold. Nice. My, how the definition of cold one has
changed.
I was actually curious. A wheatgrass shot. Okay. Oh, it's not wheatgrass. It's
matcha. It's
called magic mind. You'll like it. Don't tell me. Oh, this is the stuff you're
moving.
That's the stuff that I'm always. This is the stuff you're plugging. What's the
word?
What's the, what's the Yiddish word? I looked at Katie. Not schlepping. Hawking.
Hawking
isn't Yiddish, but it's the word I was thinking of. I'm always hawking my wares.
There you go.
What's this going to do? Help you focus. Make you feel good. Make you feel real
good. Remember
that bronger bit? Is there any more terrifying question than do you party? Do
you party? Do you
shoot moose? I was just talking to him the other day about like, oh man, you
got to get silly
bronger, but his bit about a savory Willy Wonka. I don't know it. It's just, it's
just like,
what if Willy Wonka instead of sweets, it was all savory flavors and it was the
dumbest, best
thing I've heard. I've said it in a million. Welcome. How do you do? Let's take
a trip down
my river of stew. Oh man. That is A plus bronger stuff right there. Just being
a weirdo.
That is fantastic. Yeah. He's the best. You know, it's funny that you mentioned
cold one. I'm so happy to
see you. The new special dirt nap. Yes. Is available. Will be available. No, it's
out.
It's out. It's out. Oh, you could have just, I'm sorry. I said, send me the
link. I thought it wasn't
out. I'm not going to make you watch the YouTube video that makes it, makes my
already bloated
special 45 minutes longer with ads. Oh, does it? Yeah. I mean, it might be ads
for Magic Mind,
so you'd be excited. You see yourself telling, reminding you to drink your
stuff. That has
happened to me. Has it? I've had an ad that I'm in show up in my own feed and I'm
like,
get this fucking guy out of here. I'm too close to the machinery. Yeah. I fell
inside. I fell inside
the well. I'm stuck in the gears. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Where was I going
with that though?
Well, you were talking about my new special. Yeah. Your new special being
wonderful. Oh,
and you saying Colin and really how happy I am that you're here and happy to
see you, man.
Yeah. What's up? Look at this man. I like where we're at here. This is the new
studio. Yeah.
You did it back when it was at Meltdown. Back when Meltdown was a structure, a
familiar structure.
I have a theory about Los Angeles having been gone and come back. I think every
time somebody
doesn't pick up dog shit on the sidewalk, new unaffordable housing gets built.
It's like,
it's the every time a bell rings, an angel gets its wings, Los Angeles version.
Come down my river of
stew. What I'm saying is that observation is as good. Did I just step in some
French bulldog shit? I bet
that's a condo going up over there. I bet that's a condo being built on
something I used to cherish.
Yeah. But don't a lot of them, I don't keep tabs on LA real estate, but I
always get rumblings. Oh,
it's not selling. That one's not selling or whatever. I don't know. Who can
afford any?
Yeah. That's what I'm saying. So who are they for? For the tax write-off for
the developers?
Oh, no. What a somber. I think, yeah, I think it's hell. I have the fondness
for this city.
Yeah. But you live in?
Portland. Are a lot of people just kind of asking about
that? Because I am curious about your move and how you're finding it.
Are there not? I mean, I think it's a lot of people going, oh, you did it.
Yeah. You left. And I talked to, I was at the store last night and I saw Nikki
Glaser,
and she lives in St. Louis. And I saw somebody else, Heather, I forget her name,
but she's a part of the festival that's going on. She's like, oh yeah, I just
moved back to Atlanta.
Like everybody kind of. Yeah. I was like, oh, I could do everything remotely. I
wasn't doing
showbiz shit when I was here. I wasn't auditioning or doing any of that. I was
just doing spots and then
falling off my bike during the days. And it was great. I loved it.
Yeah. Because I wasn't trying to like get the other stuff.
Why joke? Which you'll, you know, I live about 90 minutes north. I live in Ojai.
Did you know that?
No. Yeah. So I, I also have left.
Really? Yeah. What's, where are we? This is Los Feliz, bro.
I know. But is this. Oh, what is this structure?
This is your outpost? This, my friends rent this place.
Oh. And we kept the back.
Nice. Yeah.
I was like, how is he 10 minutes late? He lives there.
I was never, I was never late when I lived there.
Okay. I was always early when I lived there.
Yeah. I was like, how is he late from coming across his own driveway?
No, it took me two hours to get in today because I hit a lot of traffic.
But that's. Oh, I want to hear about Ojai.
Well, I'll tell you just to see what it gets out of you because I'm curious
about Portland.
Yeah. It's Portland, right?
Somebody took keeping it crispy, literally.
I'm not sure I understand.
So very hot up there.
It's so funny.
If I was going to describe Ojai, hot wouldn't even be in the top 10 things.
But like you and like when I, I know you're, aren't you friends with Marin?
He goes, too dry up there, too dry.
Like there's, there's this way that certain people see it.
I thought it was, I know it's not desert, but it's, it's, it's the high country,
right?
It is hotter than Ventura.
Yeah. Cause it's further from the ocean.
Doesn't burn down all the time?
It burns down, you know, every six years or so, there might be a scare.
Controlled, controlled, controlled.
It's a controlled burn for my, for my insurance company.
It's a controlled burn.
Yeah.
We start, this house is a dump and I need the money.
It's a controlled burn.
That's what people never tell you.
Sir, that's called arson.
Well, I, do you see it?
You know, I'm controlling the burn.
Yeah.
I want my house to burn down.
Tomato, tomato.
But I, I really, one of the jokes I make is move to Los Angeles,
audition for things over zoom and shoot them in Vancouver.
Yeah.
That's, that's my joke about living in LA.
Yeah.
And since we've gotten out, gotten out, I also like LA, but since we've left,
it's like,
I always say to Val, I'm like, why were we, why did we feel like we had to
sleep there?
Is it, yeah.
Is it worse or was it Stockholm syndrome the whole time?
When I lived here?
When any of us lived here.
Like, no, no, it's not, it's good.
No, it's, no, it's good.
It's nice.
Basically Joe DeRosa.
No, it's good.
No, it's good.
Yeah.
Little burr.
No, it's good.
LA's good.
I know the homeless people.
I know them.
Like, I'm good with them on my block.
Well, it's funny.
Unhoused crisis noted with compassion.
One of the reasons it got a little too hairy was our, this street turned into
like a real
town.
It was a village.
It was a shanty.
Can you say shanty town?
Yeah.
Yeah.
The Hooverville.
Is that, can we say that?
I think so.
And not to say it was just getting kind of, kind of like, there were a couple
of moments
with Val and with my daughter that were like leaning violent, scary.
And we were like, I think we're going to leave.
And then we did leave renting.
And then we were like, just like a million people were like, we're just going
to stay.
What was your journey to Portlandia?
We, uh, the old, uh, Pan Diggle happened and we got a chance to.
Everybody had a cute name for it, right?
I like to call it the plan-demic and don't explain.
Just say it like, during the plan-demic.
I had plans.
And I was waiting for a global collapse to institute them.
Controlled Burn.
That's the name of my new special.
Controlled Burn.
It's all crowd work.
Controlled Burn.
Can you handle it?
A little too right.
Somebody's already releasing that.
Colin Cain.
Controlled Burn.
It's a great Colin Cain record.
Is he still part of the world?
I've always, Colin's a very sweet guy.
So I don't want to, you know, but I'm interested in him.
Yeah.
He's, well, there's a lot of characters in this business.
But that's a great way to put it.
There's a lot of characters.
I think, wasn't it a TBS slogan?
I don't know.
Everything is welcome.
Everything's a slogan.
I think you're going to get the USA Network.
Whatever, man.
Everything's marketing.
It's all co-opted.
Yeah, how curmudgeonly are we?
Kyle?
What?
How are we what now?
How curmudgeonly are you?
Are you more curmudgeonly?
Not at all.
Not at all.
I don't know why I got...
I told Shane Torres when I was talking to Shane Torres.
I'm like, I don't know.
I feel like I'm thriving.
And he couldn't stop laughing.
Oh, really?
Well, I haven't cut my hair, so I look like this right now.
So it's hard to be like, I just feel like I'm thriving.
And he got real.
He's like, you should see yourself when you say that.
You should look at your face when you say that.
I only ask that because we already talked about how sad LA architecture is and
condominiums
and then everything's marketing and falling into the gears of our own system.
It's the easiest thing to get laughs out of is like bitching about stuff.
I see.
But you're feeling...
Great.
That's great.
Like the best ever.
The best ever.
So tell me about the movie.
You were saying we...
Yeah, me and the missus.
As we were talking about, we don't know what to call our partners of long
time without being married.
I say the missus.
Yeah, that's nice.
Which makes me feel like I'm in the American Gothic painting.
I will say every time...
I've had this happen a million times.
Because the brain does want to know what are we dealing with.
That's why we invented marriage.
You know what I mean?
It's like, okay, you guys are serious and we like categories.
Yeah.
So whenever a guy says...
Oh, I thought it was just to control a woman.
Well, that too.
Because otherwise they're a witch.
I thought that's why it existed.
Not curmudgeonly?
I'm just spitting facts, dog.
I'll be ready.
Controlled burn.
He's spitting facts.
So going back, whenever a guy says my partner, I assume he means his gay
partner, his male
partner.
Yeah.
And then like three minutes later, he says Michelle.
And I'm just