Name: Bill Gates Explains the Internet to Dave (1995) | Letterman
Uploaded: 2022-02-01T16:12:42.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Gates Explains the Internet to Dave (1995) | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-02-01. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Gates Explains the Internet to Dave (1995) | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-02-01. Transcript available.

You know, Bill, there's something that I really love about the Windows 95.
It's really cool.
And it just, it comes up right here.
Okay, now what?
It's okay.
Now look, there.
They're flying toasters.
Look.
See?
They're toasters, and they're flying.
And then, oh, here comes the brand-in!
It got looking.
It got looking.
Let me show you something here.
Okay.
Huh?
Wow.
Cool.
Make that fly.
Let me see that thing fly.
Wow!
What did you think of that quiz machine?
Very impressive piece of equipment until it exploded, wasn't it?
I've seen better.
Now, at Microsoft, I have a feeling that you guys must have a vast research and
development
department.
New ideas come across your desk every minute of every day, don't they, pretty
much?
Almost.
Yeah.
So now, if something like the quiz machine failed, what would you do?
What course of action would you take?
Um, I'd recall it.
Recall it?
But wouldn't you fire a lot of people first?
No.
No!
Let's, uh, I have, like, a million things to ask you.
First of all, if you can, describe for us, succinctly, what it is that you did
better and first that
put you where you are today.
What was the core of this?
What was the seed?
What is the essence of Microsoft?
When and how did that happen?
Okay.
Uh, I think there's a lot of elements that go into it.
Uh, vision of what software could do.
What was the vision?
What was your vision?
One, every desk, and in every home.
Right.
I don't have one on my home or in my desk.
No, we're working on that.
Vice versa.
What, but there was more to it than just that vision.
You must have known, how early did you realize you knew something that could be
exploited
and to, to this extreme?
Well, there were a small group of people who saw what this chip could do as it
became more
powerful.
And we sort of felt like a special group because we were all working on it.
And we thought, someday these big computer companies are going to have a huge
problem.
And this thing is going to reach out to the entire world.
But every year we just kept hiring more people, working on it.
It's been 20 years since we started it.
And we're not really to the full realization of that vision even, even today.
Yeah.
But this came to you more or less when you were in high school.
You were so far ahead of people in your high school class with knowledge of
computers
that the, the school hired you, didn't they?
That's right.
I did the, the school scheduling.
It was a very nice position to be in.
And how did you make that work to your advantage?
Well, we, we had 80% boys and 20% girls.
Right.
But in my classes, they were all girls.
Just you.
Because you worked the schedule into the.
There you go.
Why, why don't I have a computer?
We need, we need to find an application for you.
Well, part of your problem is you have too many assistants.
Uh-huh.
They're.
Well, I, I like, I like having assistants.
Well, they're, they're like human computers.
Uh-huh.
They're doing everything for you.
Right.
Maybe you should let them have computers, but.
Well, I, I think some of them do.
I, I, you know, certainly haven't met all of them, but I think some of them do.
But, but you know, I think about this and what about this internet thing?
Do you, do you know anything about that?
Sure.
What, what the hell is that exactly?
Well, it's, it's become a place where people are publishing information.
Right.
So everybody can have their own homepage.
Companies are there, the latest information.
It's wild what's going on.
You can send electronic mail to people.
Uh, it is the big new thing.
Yeah.
But you know, uh, it's easy to criticize something you don't fully understand,
which is my position
here.
Go ahead.
But I, I can remember a couple of months ago, there was like a big breakthrough
announcement
that on the internet or on some computer deal, they were going to broadcast a
baseball game.
You could listen to a baseball game on your computer.
And I just thought to myself, does radio ring a bell?
You know what I mean?
There's, there's a difference.
There is a difference.
It's not a huge difference.
What is the difference?
But you can, you can listen to the baseball game whenever you want.
Right.
To.
Oh, I see.
So it's stored in one of your memory deals.
Exactly.
That's the RAM thing you talked about earlier.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Do tape recorders ring a bell?
Yeah.
I just, I just don't know.
What, what can you just knowing me, the little you know me now, what, how, what
am I missing
here?
What do I need?
Well, if you want to learn about the latest cigars or auto racing.
Right.
Statistics.
Well, you know, I've got that covered.
I subscribe to two British magazines devoted entirely to motor sports.
And I call the Quaker state speed line about two times a half hour.
So now, now would the computer give me more than I'm getting that way?
Well, you can find other people who have the same unusual interests you do.
And.
You mean, you mean the troubled loner chat room on the internet?
Absolutely.
I think one day I'll get one of these deals, but I, you know, I've played with
them.
And then you, you know, you're typing in and then you get that thing, that
little arrow.
Is that the arrow?
You bet.
And then it's just, you know, it's like, Oh, I get it.
It's an eye test.
What are we?
Tell me about your house.
Are you in your new house yet?
No, I'm still building that.
I'm hoping to move in by the end of 96.
Is this just like the coolest house of all time?
For me, it's the coolest house of all time.
What are the things that you've designed for the house that really you're very
excited about?
I've got a trampoline room that I can go and use.
A trampoline room.
That's right.
This is like an actual trampoline or like a computer?
Non-virtual.
This is.
This is the real deal.
Sure.
And you have artwork that can be changed.
Right.
I have very high quality screens throughout the house.
And so I can call up.
I can take a topic like scientists or Russia or Renaissance paintings.
And so different ones of images related to that topic will come up.
And wherever I go, you get those high quality displays.
Man.
How many square feet is this?
Well, it's fairly big.
What are we talking about?
Oh, more than 50,000 square feet.
50,000 square feet?
This theater is not that big, Bill.
It's got different parts.
It's got a place where I can entertain.
Oh, well, that's good.
You don't want to cheat yourself on that.
Okay.
Hmm.
Is there something now beyond what we understand about computers that, like 20
years ago, we
didn't fully understand computers?
Is there now another level of something?
Maybe we haven't even thought of it.
Maybe it's not even possible.
Maybe, you know, a whole different mechanism, a whole different software and
hardware.
Or is this going to be it now through the end of time?
Well, mostly what we're working on now is the computer being a tool, a tool to
help us learn or find other people with the same interests.
Eventually, we may figure out how to make the computer think, but that turns
out to be a very tough problem.
In fact, there's been almost no progress made on it.
So nobody knows when that'll happen.
Some people think it'll never happen.
Yeah, we don't want them to think, do we?
Not really, I wouldn't think.
Well, it's a scary thought.
Yeah.
It's too bad there's no money in this, too, isn't it?
Just a shame.
Yeah.
It's a shame.
It's a shame.
It's a shame.
I don't want them to think, do we?
Not really, I wouldn't think.
Yeah.
It's a scary thought.
Yeah.
It's too bad there's no money in this, too, isn't it?
Just a shame.
Yeah.
Well, you know what we're working on now is the computer being a tool, a tool
to help us learn or find other
people with the same interests.
Just a shame.
The book is called The Road Ahead.
And Bill, thank you very much.
I can't thank you for your help here with the big quiz machine tonight.