Name: Jimmy Kimmel's Favorite Letterman Moments
Uploaded: 2022-04-05T15:02:14.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Jimmy Kimmel's Favorite Letterman Moments' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-04-05. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Jimmy Kimmel's Favorite Letterman Moments' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-04-05. Transcript available.

- Hi, I'm Jimmy Kimmel.
This is my favorite YouTube channel.
I have a YouTube channel, but I don't look at that.
This is the one I spend most of my day looking at.
I'm embarrassed to say it because Dave might watch this,
but I'm an obsessive David Letterman fan.
I have a license plate on my car
that said late night when I was in high school.
My birthday cake said late night
with David Letterman, the cake on it.
I started smoking cigars because of David Letterman.
No joke.
I watched every one of these shows.
I didn't have a VCR.
I was up at 12:30 watching these shows,
late for high school, every morning.
Was known in school as the kid who watched David Letterman.
Not exactly most likely to succeed,
but somehow I never thought I would host a talk show.
I just, my dream was to one day become Dave's friend,
and that is probably never gonna happen.
But I do have a show,
and I've had the fortune of meeting Dave many times.
And to me, these videos,
most everything you remember from your childhood does not stand up.
It does not, it just isn't as good as you remembered it.
It's either slow or it's just not that funny.
I can't get enough of these videos.
I can't believe how funny they are.
I just, and it brings me back to that moment when I was sitting at my desk in
my bedroom.
I had a 12-inch black and white TV set that I'd stolen from downstairs when we
got a color set.
And that was it, I was there and locked into the show when the theme song
kicked in.
It was so exciting, and when the show was over, I couldn't wait till the next
day.
So some of my favorite moments from Late Night with David Letterman.
I have to start with a segment, a remote segment.
Nobody was, nobody's ever been better at doing these, not just Late Night, just
ever, than Dave was.
There's a segment called, well, I called it Just Bulbs.
And Dave went into a store that sold bulbs, and it just so happened that he
asked the woman, a very patient woman, if they had other things.
And he asked her if she had shades, and she said, no, if you want shades, you
have to go to a store called Just Shades.
And, of course, they cut right to a store only in New York called Just Shades.
It's great.
The name of the store is Just Bulbs, and that's exactly what we sell, Just Bulbs.
Okay, so besides bulbs, what do you have here?
Nothing.
How about shades? Could you get shades here?
No, we are Just Bulbs. If you want shades, maybe go to a place called Just Shades.
We sell nothing but money.
It's just so pricey.
What is the name of the store?
Just Shades.
And what can you get in here?
What can you get in here?
All the shades.
That's why our name is Just Shades.
But seriously, what can you get besides shades here?
I owe a great debt to David Letterman, to Late Night with David Letterman, to
the writers and producers and everyone that worked on the show.
But you can really see it in this clip because Larry Bud Melman, who was the
first person ever to appear on Late Night with David Letterman, this man who
had no skills, really, or talent, I guess.
And yet, he was hilarious, I don't think he knew that he was funny, or at least
he didn't know why he was funny, but he was funny.
And Dave sent him to Port Authority, the bus station, to welcome tourists to
New York.
If you've ever been to Port Authority, you know that it's not a great place.
But Larry Bud was there with a hot towel and a microphone that he didn't know
how to use at all.
And this is one of those situations where my Uncle Frank kind of filled the
Larry Bud Melman role for me on my show.
But it's a situation where you think you know what's going to be funny about
the idea, and then it takes a left turn, and then it's something entirely
different.
So, just watching Larry Bud Melman work a microphone is television magic.
Welcome to New York, sometimes called Fun City.
How is your...
And where are you?
From the Eastern Shore of Virginia.
Oh, do you have any questions about New York?
Well, it isn't easy, that's for sure.
Did you have a snack?
One of the shows I watched a lot when I was a kid was M.A.S.H., and Alan Alda
was a great actor, and I never really thought of Alan Alda as a, I don't know,
somebody you'd think was funny, other than thinking he was funny.
Then Dave went into a Chinese restaurant, and I don't know what their intent
was, but the result was...
The result was an investigation of sorts into Alan Alda and his proclivities
when it came to eating Chinese food.
In the last several years, much has been said and written about Alan Alda, the
TV star and the film star, the motion picture director, writer, humanitarian,
champion of minority causes, but surprisingly enough, we know very little about
Alan Alda, a guy who likes Chinese food.
That's why we're here at the Hunan Park restaurant.
This is David Chang, one of the owners.
David, nice to see you.
Nice meeting you, too.
And this is David Chang.
Paul.
I'm sorry, Paul.
How are you?
Nice to see you.
Tell us about this photograph of Alan Alda here in the apron.
I guess he actually worked at the restaurant for a while, huh?
No, he never worked in a restaurant.
Actually, eight years ago, when we first restaurant opened up in the 98th
Street in Broadway, he's become to the regular customer, then later become to
my personal friend.
Good friend of yours.
Now, when he would come to the restaurant, Paul, would he actually wear his own
apron like that?
Yeah.
That's actually part of the four-season movie he shot, so we do this in the
kitchen.
I teach him how to cook and prepare Chinese food.
So you guys, in a way, were indirectly responsible for the success of that
movie.
This movie is not in the domestic show in the theater.
Let's go to the international.
He's promoting this movie.
I see.
Now, here we see Alan Alda, and I guess that's Paul.
Now, what kind of food does he enjoy?
He likes string beans, and he likes cold noodles with sesame sauce, fried
dumplings.
Most food we have, he likes it very much.
Does he have soup?
Oh, he has soup all the time.
What kind of soup?
What about this one?
House space soup, hot and sour soup.
And what about chopsticks?
Does he use chopsticks?
Oh, he uses chopsticks very well.
Does, when he eats here, does, you know, you clear the dishes away?
Is there a lot of crumbs of food and stuff left over?
No, not very.
Now, what kind of a tip would the guy leave you?
Very good tip.
Very good tip.
The Hunan Balcony Restaurant, another Chinese restaurant in a different part of
town,
and yet, once again in the window, we see more photos of Alan Alda.
Here on the left, the complete montage of Alan Alda cooking, and over here,
another photograph of Alan Alda with the owners.
So, we decided to come in and talk to the manager, James, about Alan Alda, a
man who truly seems now to love Chinese food.
How do you do, James?
Nice to see you.
At the other Chinese restaurant, we found out a few of Alan Alda's likes and
dislikes.
What can you tell us?
What insight as to his ordering can you offer us?
Well, when he come in, he bring his wine.
He come in and order two or three dishes for, you know, a meal.
Does he ever order too much and have to take some home?
No, he ordered a hot special soup.
Sometimes he changes the dish, you know.
So, variety. He does enjoy a variety.
And fried dumplings, corn with sesame sauce, especially like the string beans
and broccoli with garlic sauce.
Let me ask you something.
At the other restaurant, we heard that he did use chopsticks.
He used chopsticks, yeah.
And he doesn't really leave much of a mess. Is that true here?
Yeah, he's true. He's true. He never leave a mess or some kind of, you know, 30
stuff on his table, like that.
That's, uh, has he ever, never been in any trouble, ever get rowdy, out of hand?
No, he's very gentle. He's a very nice guy.
And rice, steam or fried?
Uh, steamed rice.
And about a tip, we found out at the other restaurant, pretty good tipper?
Yes, pretty good tipper here, too.
Uh, do you have any other photos of Alan Alda? We can just kind of, uh...
Uh, this is, uh, our host here, this thing, and that is, uh, from Mr. Fang in
the...
That's Alan in the middle?
Yeah.
Okay, and what about other, uh, pictures?
Another picture here is, uh, you see, you can see the Mr. Fang, Alan Aldo, and,
uh, and he's, uh, making the commercial on his, uh, four season on another
restaurant, Hunan Pa.
Yeah.
But you could almost put together a whole series of Alan Alda Chinese
restaurant trading cards.
Yeah.
He could be one of the Chinese food.
Great.
Well, thank you very much, James.
I appreciate your time and trouble.
Well, there you have it.
Uh, another view, uh, of Alan Alda.
Truly a man who loves Chinese food.
And I don't know about you, but I feel like, uh, I know him a little better now.
I love when Dave would go out into the field, as we call it, which is really
just leaving the office.
But Dave went to this inventor's convention, and the inventions were mostly
ridiculous.
But there was one invention.
I know it wasn't fake, but it's just so ridiculous.
It couldn't possibly reveal.
This guy invented a, um, uh, some kind of a device that would prevent you from
being buried alive.
And naturally, Dave asked, you know, is this, has this been a problem?
And the guy, through an interpreter, explained that he'd been buried alive
three times.
And so, this is why he felt it was necessary.
It seems like, uh, at least at the inventor's convention, that the better
inventions are coming from Mexico City.
And this is, uh, Roberto Muncie.
Muncie Weiss.
Muncie Weiss.
And, uh, Pedro Cruz, whom we know is going to interpret for us, what is, uh, uh,
the invention we're interested in,
according to the pamphlet, Life Detector, to avoid being embalmed or buried
alive.
The premise is, now, if a loved one, uh, appears to be dead, is loaded into the
coffin,
locked into the box, and is still alive, this alarm system will let the loved
ones know that Uncle Herb is not gone yet.
Muncie He doesn't have to do anything.
Uh, there are systems, systems connected to his body that will automatically,
uh, make, uh, make it known that he's still alive.
Muncie Could you ask Roberto, um, does this happen a lot?
Muncie Yes, uh, he told me to tell you that he was buried alive three times.
Muncie He got a little worried about it.
Muncie So, uh, he developed this idea, and, uh, it has, uh, proved to be of
great interest to a lot of people.
Muncie He died three times.
Muncie People thought he died.
Muncie And then they put him in the coffin.
Muncie And at the funeral, uh, he woke up, or?
Muncie It was mere chance, all of these times.
Uh, one of these times was, uh, he was going to be robbed, and somebody saw
that he was still alive, and that was how he came, uh.
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After the second time when he was thrown off by a horse.
Muncie After the, after the third time that you were buried alive, it must have
got to be annoying, huh?
Muncie Not just annoying, it's the most terrible feeling that you might
experience.
Muncie It might start carrying a card with you that just says, "I'd kind of
like another opinion."
Muncie One final question, I can understand being buried alive once, you know,
sure, everybody's going to make a mistake.
Muncie Or even twice, you know, somebody's looking the other way, they close
the lid.
Muncie But, uh, three times. How, how has it happened to him three times?
Muncie This is something that he can't explain. It just happened that way.
Muncie Just to run a bad luck then.
Muncie Just to run a bad luck then.
Muncie Just to run a bad luck.
Muncie Well, congratulations on the invention and better luck to you.
Muncie Thank you.
Muncie Thank you again, Pedro.
Muncie Thank you.
Muncie Thank you.
Muncie One of the clips I've watched the most of David Letterman, this is
something that
my band leader, Cleto, and I quote all the time, is there was a woman on the
show who had
some monkeys that wore dresses, and that's a great start. And one of the
monkeys was menacing
Muncie And this is one of the few times that you see Dave show real fear. I
think what Crispin Glover was on
was one, and this is another. The monkey was lunging at Dave, and Dave said
something to the effect of,
"I think he's gonna, he's gonna, uh, he's gonna reach into my neck and pull a
vein out."
Muncie Yes? Sandy, why don't you go get your chair down there?
Muncie Offer your hand to Sandy.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady, like a gentleman.
Muncie She's gonna leap at me and pull a vein out of my neck and kill me.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.
Muncie Offer your hand to the lady.

Jimmy Kimmel's Favorite Letterman Moments

- Hi, I'm Jimmy Kimmel.
This is my favorite YouTube channel.
I have a YouTube channel, but I don't look at that.
This is the one I spend most of my day looking at.
I'm embarrassed to say it because Dave might watch this,
but I'm an obsessive David Letterman fan.
I have a license plate on my car
that said late night when I was in high school.
My birthday cake said late night
with David Letterman, the cake on it.
I started smoking cigars because of David Letterman.
No joke.
I watched every one of these shows.
I didn't have a VCR.
I was up at 12:30 watching these shows,
late for high school, every morning.
Was known in school as the kid who watched David Letterman.
Not exactly most likely to succeed,
but somehow I never thought I would host a talk show.
I just, my dream was to one day become Dave's friend,
and that is probably never gonna happen.
But I do have a show,
and I've had the fortune of meeting Dave many times.
And to me, these videos,
most everything you remember from your childhood does not stand up.
It does not, it just isn't as good as you remembered it.
It's either slow or it's just not that funny.
I can't get enough of these videos.
I can't believe how funny they are.
I just, and it brings me back to that moment when I was sitting at my desk in
my bedroom.
I had a 12-inch black and white TV set that I'd stolen from downstairs when we
got a color set.
And that was it, I was there and locked into the show when the theme song
kicked in.
It was so exciting, and when the show was over, I couldn't wait till the next
day.
So some of my favorite moments from Late Night with David Letterman.
I have to start with a segment, a remote segment.
Nobody was, nobody's ever been better at doing these, not just Late Night, just
ever, than Dave was.
There's a segment called, well, I called it Just Bulbs.
And Dave went into a store that sold bulbs, and it just so happened that he
asked the woman, a very patient woman, if they had other things.
And he asked her if she had shades, and she said, no, if you want shades, you
have to go to a store called Just Shades.
And, of course, they cut right to a store only in New York called Just Shades.
It's great.
The name of the store is Just Bulbs, and that's exactly what we sell, Just Bulbs.
Okay, so besides bulbs, what do you have here?
Nothing.
How about shades? Could you get shades here?
No, we are Just Bulbs. If you want shades, maybe go to a place called Just Shades.
We sell nothing but money.
It's just so pricey.
What is the name of the store?
Just Shades.
And what can you get in here?
What can you get in here?
All the shades.
That's why our name is Just Shades.
But seriously, what can you get besides shades here?
I owe a great debt to David Letterman, to Late Night with David Letterman, to
the writers and producers and everyone that worked on the show.
But you can really see it in this clip because Larry Bud Melman, who was the
first person ever to appear on Late Night with David Letterman, this man who
had no skills, really, or talent, I guess.
And yet, he was hilarious, I don't think he knew that he was funny, or at least
he didn't know why he was funny, but he was funny.
And Dave sent him to Port Authority, the bus station, to welcome tourists to
New York.
If you've ever been to Port Authority, you know that it's not a great place.
But Larry Bud was there with a hot towel and a microphone that he didn't know
how to use at all.
And this is one of those situations where my Uncle Frank kind of filled the
Larry Bud Melman role for me on my show.
But it's a situation where you think you know what's going to be funny about
the idea, and then it takes a left turn, and then it's something entirely
different.
So, just watching Larry Bud Melman work a microphone is television magic.
Welcome to New York, sometimes called Fun City.
How is your...
And where are you?
From the Eastern Shore of Virginia.
Oh, do you have any questions about New York?
Well, it isn't easy, that's for sure.
Did you have a snack?
One of the shows I watched a lot when I was a kid was M.A.S.H., and Alan Alda
was a great actor, and I never really thought of Alan Alda as a, I don't know,
somebody you'd think was funny, other than thinking he was funny.
Then Dave went into a Chinese restaurant, and I don't know what their intent
was, but the result was...
The result was an investigation of sorts into Alan Alda and his proclivities
when it came to eating Chinese food.
In the last several years, much has been said and written about Alan Alda, the
TV star and the film star, the motion picture director, writer, humanitarian,
champion of minority causes, but surprisingly enough, we know very little about
Alan Alda, a guy who likes Chinese food.
That's why we're here at the Hunan Park restaurant.
This is David Chang, one of the owners.
David, nice to see you.
Nice meeting you, too.
And this is David Chang.
Paul.
I'm sorry, Paul.
How are you?
Nice to see you.
Tell us about this photograph of Alan Alda here in the apron.
I guess he actually worked at the restaurant for a while, huh?
No, he never worked in a restaurant.
Actually, eight years ago, when we first restaurant opened up in the 98th
Street in Broadway, he's become to the regular customer, then later become to
my personal friend.
Good friend of yours.
Now, when he would come to the restaurant, Paul, would he actually wear his own
apron like that?
Yeah.
That's actually part of the four-season movie he shot, so we do this in the
kitchen.
I teach him how to cook and prepare Chinese food.
So you guys, in a way, were indirectly responsible for the success of that
movie.
This movie is not in the domestic show in the theater.
Let's go to the international.
He's promoting this movie.
I see.
Now, here we see Alan Alda, and I guess that's Paul.
Now, what kind of food does he enjoy?
He likes string beans, and he likes cold noodles with sesame sauce, fried
dumplings.
Most food we have, he likes it very much.
Does he have soup?
Oh, he has soup all the time.
What kind of soup?
What about this one?
House space soup, hot and sour soup.
And what about chopsticks?
Does he use chopsticks?
Oh, he uses chopsticks very well.
Does, when he eats here, does, you know, you clear the dishes away?
Is there a lot of crumbs of food and stuff left over?
No, not very.
Now, what kind of a tip would the guy leave you?
Very good tip.
Very good tip.
The Hunan Balcony Restaurant, another Chinese restaurant in a different part of
town,
and yet, once again in the window, we see more photos of Alan Alda.
Here on the left, the complete montage of Alan Alda cooking, and over here,
another photograph of Alan Alda with the owners.
So, we decided to come in and talk to the manager, James, about Alan Alda, a
man who truly seems now to love Chinese food.
How do you do, James?
Nice to see you.
At the other Chinese restaurant, we found out a few of Alan Alda's likes and
dislikes.
What can you tell us?
What insight as to his ordering can you offer us?
Well, when he come in, he bring his wine.
He come in and order two or three dishes for, you know, a meal.
Does he ever order too much and have to take some home?
No, he ordered a hot special soup.
Sometimes he changes the dish, you know.
So, variety. He does enjoy a variety.
And fried dumplings, corn with sesame sauce, especially like the string beans
and broccoli with garlic sauce.
Let me ask you something.
At the other restaurant, we heard that he did use chopsticks.
He used chopsticks, yeah.
And he doesn't really leave much of a mess. Is that true here?
Yeah, he's true. He's true. He never leave a mess or some kind of, you know, 30
stuff on his table, like that.
That's, uh, has he ever, never been in any trouble, ever get rowdy, out of hand?
No, he's very gentle. He's a very nice guy.
And rice, steam or fried?
Uh, steamed rice.
And about a tip, we found out at the other restaurant, pretty good tipper?
Yes, pretty good tipper here, too.
Uh, do you have any other photos of Alan Alda? We can just kind of, uh...
Uh, this is, uh, our host here, this thing, and that is, uh, from Mr. Fang in
the...
That's Alan in the middle?
Yeah.
Okay, and what about other, uh, pictures?
Another picture here is, uh, you see, you can see the Mr. Fang, Alan Aldo, and,
uh, and he's, uh, making the commercial on his, uh, four season on another
restaurant, Hunan Pa.
Yeah.
But you could almost put together a whole series of Alan Alda Chinese
restaurant trading cards.
Yeah.
He could be one of the Chinese food.
Great.
Well, thank you very much, James.
I appreciate your time and trouble.
Well, there you have it.
Uh, another view, uh, of Alan Alda.
Truly a man who loves Chinese food.
And I don't know about you, but I feel like, uh, I know him a little better now.
I love when Dave would go out into the field, as we call it, which is really
just leaving the office.
But Dave went to this inventor's convention, and the inventions were mostly
ridiculous.
But there was one invention.
I know it wasn't fake, but it's just so ridiculous.
It couldn't possibly reveal.
This guy invented a, um, uh, some kind of a device that would prevent you from
being buried alive.
And naturally, Dave asked, you know, is this, has this been a problem?
And the guy, through an interpreter, explained that he'd been buried alive
three times.
And so, this is why he felt it was necessary.
It seems like, uh, at least at the inventor's convention, that the better
inventions are coming from Mexico City.
And this is, uh, Roberto Muncie.
Muncie Weiss.
Muncie Weiss.
And, uh, Pedro Cruz, whom we know is going to interpret for us, what is, uh, uh,
the invention we're interested in,
according to the pamphlet, Life Detector, to avoid being embalmed or buried
alive.
The premise is, now, if a loved one, uh, appears to be dead, is loaded into the
coffin,
locked into the box, and is still alive, this alarm system will let the loved
ones know that Uncle Herb is not gone yet.
Muncie He doesn't have to do anything.
Uh, there are systems, systems connected to his body that will automatically,
uh, make, uh, make it known that he's still alive.
Muncie Could you ask Roberto, um, does this happen a lot?
Muncie Yes, uh, he told me to tell you that he was buried alive three times.
Muncie He got a little worried about it.
Muncie So, uh, he developed this idea, and, uh, it has, uh, proved to be of
great interest to a lot of people.
Muncie He died three times.
Muncie People thought he died.
Muncie And then they put him in the coffin.
Muncie And at the funeral, uh, he woke up, or?
Muncie It was mere chance, all of these times.
Uh, one of these times was, uh, he was going to be robbed, and somebody saw
that he was still alive, and that was how he came, uh.
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After which time did he get the idea for an alarm to prevent this?
Muncie After the second time when he was thrown off by a horse.
Muncie After the, after the third time that you were buried alive, it must have
got to be annoying, huh?
Muncie Not just annoying, it's the most terrible feeling that you might
experience.
Muncie It might start carrying a card with you that just says, "I'd kind of
like another opinion."
Muncie One final question, I can understand being buried alive once, you know,
sure, everybody's going to make a mistake.
Muncie Or even twice, you know, somebody's looking the other way, they close
the lid.
Muncie But, uh, three times. How, how has it happened to him three times?
Muncie This is something that he can't explain. It just happened that way.
Muncie Just to run a bad luck then.
Muncie Just to run 