Name: How Many Guys In Mice Costumes Can Fit Into A Dunkin' Donuts? | Letterman
Uploaded: 2022-06-06T13:58:36.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'How Many Guys In Mice Costumes Can Fit Into A Dunkin' Donuts? | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-06-06. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'How Many Guys In Mice Costumes Can Fit Into A Dunkin' Donuts? | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-06-06. Transcript available.

here's here's something we've done this in the past and it hardly ever works
and we thought we'd
do it again tonight you know we're talking about the dunkin donuts here's the
uh new york post uh
and it's a newspaper here in new york city and there's the uh there's a little
mouse guy walking
by this has got to be a setup if you think about it this is the dunkin donuts
and it just happened
to be a new york post photographer although that makes sense that the
photographer would be heading
to dunkin donuts and they uh take a shot of this mouse here in the uh donut
case and since this
happened all hell has broken loose it's just crazy dunkin donuts has shut down
uh the dunkin donuts
people are suing the local dunkin donuts uh the new york post is getting sued
everybody's upset you know
this is some kind of setup deal you think it is oh absolutely they paid
somebody off to go down there
and it's probably a like a little stick on mouse that's probably not a you know
one of those things
the baby on board kind of thing they stick they got a mouse kind of thing there
uh so anyway uh we thought
well tonight what we'd do is you know make matters worse by irritating more
people
and trust me this has never worked in the last we've done this 100 times it's
never worked in
the last 50 times and what we do is we dress a bunch of guys up like uh mice in
this case mice
and we we'll send them into the dunkin donuts one at a time send them in one at
a time
to see how many how many guys in mouse suits we can get into a dunkin donuts
here we go turn on
guys in mouse suits can't fit into dunkin donuts okay this is the dunkin donuts
uh not so very far from
the theater i don't know the exact address does anybody know the exact address
broadway and what
is it broadway and 52nd there it is it's hard to tell if 50 what brought 53rd
and second what did i
do it on broadway between 53rd and 52nd on broadway okay thank god my heavens
there it is a dunkin donuts
and they're doing a uh land office business tonight aren't they are they even
open i mean did we check
did we call ahead this is some boneheaded stunt we'd pull no they're closed
sorry you can't get none of
them in oh look it's me dave hi how you doing okay there's the dunkin donuts
and there's some uh folks
just stumbling around runaways abductees you don't know what's going on this is
broadway between 52nd
and 53rd it's dusk here in manhattan well that's a sad picture isn't it
new york city i'm telling you the city that never sleeps because it takes a nap
between 5 30 and 6 30
that's why uh oh they say oh look kids let's go see the rodents oh more donuts
mommy all right
we're gonna see how many guys in mouse suits you can get into that dunkin
donuts
all right let's send a guy in send in a mouse send in our first mouse uh-oh
okay so far one where'd he go climbing the stairs
look at that they got like a mouse in the stairs
i'm telling you this right there that's the kind of thing that will triple
their business
when people say oh yes but like they got the giant mouse let's go in anyway it's
fun who cares
all right they get to like a second level there at the dunkin donuts paul i
didn't realize that an
upper dining room i think you're dining upstairs okay let's send in three more
miles see what
happens here let's make some progress got one in so far there's one two one two
that first guy in a mouse suit
tiny black mouse
all right put them on the stairs
i mean i mean what makes us think they're gonna kick costumed mouse mice i mean
they they they don't
even kick out the real mice they get
all right there's there's four
this place has probably not sold a donut in a week
uh okay let's see we got four in there and uh let's uh let's just uh run the
table here let's send in
four more let's make it an even eight send in four more playing how many guys
in mouse
how many women in fur coats can get into a dunkin donuts
no pushing no no shoving there's room for that's that's kind of cute isn't it
it really is it's a
lovely tap low if they get the right pr the right ad agency they can turn this
thing into a bonanza
turn it around turn it right around what do you do paul somebody hands you
lemons what do you do my
friend lemonade baby that's exactly all right we got eight in there now and uh
two more let's go two
more make it an even pen how many guys in my suits
nobody seems to care this is we've run up against this many many times nobody
really seems to care
about civil disobedience anymore in this country uh okay let's just send in uh
five more five more make
it 15. wait a minute oh yeah i'm sorry hold it hold it hold it hold it hey hold
it we ran out
out we ran out of my suits i'm sorry so we just what is it we only had ten mice
suits what kind of
suit is that ten mouse suits i don't know that's the dog a monkey zoro a tick
and a tooth that's what just
a tick and a tooth a dog a monkey a tick and a tooth a tick and a tooth all
right so what do we
got in there now we got a total of uh 15 right 15 costumed characters this is
very discouraging
absolutely nothing is happening all right i got a dracula i got a batman i have
marie antoinette i
have a cowboy and i have a dinosaur what do you think paul send them all in
send them in there they go
drop down marie antoinette never works cowboy it never works there you go what'd
i tell you it never
works nobody cares we just leave them there is that what we can leave them
there yeah for how long the
rest of the night why not see what happens see what happens nothing clearly
nothing nothing happens
no one cares they're they're actually probably going to triple the business is
that is that one of our
is that an actual mouse or one of ours that's one of theirs i think
is there any staff maybe there's no staff working i don't know everyone's
everyone's dead i think so
the plague has gotten them all my god they're dead
oh my god take it easy paul take it easy all right look at this let's go back i
understand is the guy
this is the uh dunkin donuts and the i was told that the manager was coming
over to talk to the uh
cartooned costumed characters in the dunkin donuts restaurant doesn't seem to
be happening
oh somebody should call kofi anand
the manager won't talk to anybody will not negotiate so it's a it's official we've
taken over the dunkin
donut all right it's ours they've liberated it
we now own a dunkin donut that's the way it works here in new york city if you're
not
you're not going to fight for your donut shop my friend it's all ours give it
up the post i don't
know how they get this i don't know these these folks got a nose for the news
look at this right
here as per our little lesson episode there mice knowing you giant mice kicked
out of dunkin donuts
but except it didn't really happen here's the dunkin donuts in question
you know it's it's sad because here's the dunkin donuts where they found the
mice running around
and you're right paul they have the dining room downstairs downstairs yeah and
right next to it is
tad's steakhouse that's a great steakhouse they've been in business for 50 60
years at least and they
got mice in there the size of spaniels and and you hear nothing about that no
one cares dunkin donuts
one little mouse boom adios on mouse hit the road my friend i know yeah it's
too bad ain't it well
that's life in the big city yeah yeah we get a we get a word on those giant
things down there huh
neutrino no that's not what i'm talking about the big things they got busted
loose huh neutrino what was
a capybara it's not a capybara wasn't a bandicoot we're looking for giant rodents
the category is giant
rodents for 50 alex how about the horn section you guys know about giant road a
bandicoot no i think
a bandicoot's a duck isn't it a bandicoot's a giant rodent a giant pig-sized
rodent really indigenous
to what area oh man we're not taping any of this are we okay listen to this paul
rodentia is by far the
largest order of mammals nearly half of all the mammal species are rodents wow
yeah wow is right
capybara the one we were talking about earlier is the largest rodent about four
feet high at the
shoulder and is presently running the cbs television you seen him get up to his
office
i have not uh yeah he's up there uh-huh yeah he's developing pilots left and
right we're looking
for 10 o'clock shows and he's the guy to do it uh-huh and this is the uh the
nutria that's the other
one this doesn't say much about that that's the one that overran louisiana
there it is kind of cute
and in the meantime the cops came to the dunkin donuts do we have that here
they are all being
escorted out there everybody's got to go turn out the lights the party's over
okay there they go the
sad side of it
but you know people walking by tourists seeing those things coming oh let's see
that musical what is
what is that saying there well that looks pretty good the cowboys running yes