Name: Beyoncé Can't Stop Watching Her Performance For President Obama | Letterman
Uploaded: 2022-06-20T20:34:12.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Beyoncé Can't Stop Watching Her Performance For President Obama | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-06-20. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Beyoncé Can't Stop Watching Her Performance For President Obama | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-06-20. Transcript available.

Listen to this. Our first guest is a 10-time, 10-time, 10-time Grammy Award
winner.
That's remarkable. That's just unbelievable. She's won 10 Grammy Awards.
That's cool.
That's who we have.
She is also a talented actress who produced and stars in a new film entitled
Obsessed.
It opens on Friday. Here's the always lovely Beyoncé.
How you doing?
I'm wonderful. How are you?
I'm okay, my friend.
10 Grammy Awards. That's just remarkable.
I know, and it's so funny because back when I won the majority, I had no idea
what was going on.
It went by so fast, I didn't realize what an amazing accomplishment it was that
day.
And you're still just a kid, and you started out very young, and you still got
a huge career ahead of you.
Thank you.
And those are beautiful earrings.
Thank you.
You know, for a second...
For a second, I said to myself,
Are those Grammy Awards?
But they're...
Would that be something?
Oh, please stop it.
Well, tell me about your year, big year.
You got the upcoming tour.
Tell me about this tour.
Who can go on a tour like this?
It's 105, 102 dates or something?
It's 115 dates.
115 dates.
And how long will that take?
It takes about seven months.
Well, right now it's seven months.
I do a lot of shows back-to-back.
Maybe four shows and then a day off because I like to go home in between.
So I'd rather just kind of do all the shows together and then I'm able to go
home.
Where does the tour begin?
It starts in Europe and then I come on Father's Day to America.
I start off in New York City, Madison Square Garden.
Good.
And then I go to Japan and I go to Ethiopia and I go all around the world.
And it's so interesting to see the difference in the crowds, especially over in
Japan.
No one told me the first time I performed there that everyone is so polite.
And whenever you speak or sing, no one really moves.
So the whole time I'm thinking, wow, I must really, really suck.
That's crazy.
I'm just pondering, I mean, just listening to you describe this itinerary, and
it's only
a partial itinerary, is exhausting to me.
It just must knock you down, doesn't it?
I mean, I do work very hard and I do get really tired.
But when I'm home, I'm so lazy.
I mean, I literally drop my shoes there.
I can't cook.
I'm the worst house, I'm the worst.
Anything to do with cleaning, cooking, anything domestic, I'm just really bad
at it.
Yeah.
Well, that's all right.
I have time.
I'll figure it out.
Yeah, I mean, sure, you've got other things, other priorities right now.
Little things.
Would you consider taking Japan off the list?
I mean, if they're just going to stand there, for heaven's sakes.
You don't need that, do you?
Oh, well, I think they'll be, I mean, I got to do Japan.
I have some great fans out there.
Tell me about working in front of the president, the inauguration, and that
must have been thrilling.
Oh, my God.
It's, I think, the best moment of my career, absolutely.
I was so nervous and so honored to be there, and it was really difficult to
keep from bursting
into tears.
It was really a moment, and I've never watched so many, I've never watched one
of my performances
so many times.
I literally wanted to just repeat it over and over again.
Keep reliving it.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
So, you're there.
What was the show?
Who was on the show?
What was the feeling?
I mean, was it when you go there, you have an idea of what it's going to be
like?
Completely different than what you anticipated?
Yes.
I mean, it was the neighborhood ball, and he wanted to invite everyone from the
neighborhood
and every celebrity was there.
Who else performed?
Mary J. Blige.
Jay performed.
How did that go?
Was he nervous about that?
Well, no, I don't think so, but, you know, the next day, the next day he
performed for everyone
that campaigned for Obama, and they told him it was just going to be a regular
show, and
he, you know, we were in our hip-hop clothes, and we got there, everyone, they
were in tux.
So, he's like, okay, maybe I shouldn't do 99 Problems, but a bitch ain't one.
And we found out.
Sure.
So, he changed it to 99 Problems, but a bitch ain't one.
Quick thinking.
And it was great.
Yeah, it was great.
I'm wearing my hip-hop clothes right now.
Oh.
So am I.
Yeah, I know you are.
Oh, boy.
Tell me about your sister is younger than you are, isn't she?
Yes, she is.
I think she's been on the show, as a matter of fact.
Yes, I saw her on the show.
She's like your kid sister?
How much younger is she?
She's five years, but I'm very protective, and I always treated her like my
baby.
And one day she told us this little bully, this little guy in school, she was
only about
nine, was really harassing her.
So, me and my girls all showed up, and we surrounded him, and we're like, you've
been messing with
my sister?
I'm telling you, you've been warned until him Destiny's Child has warned you.
So, we were real gangsters.
I like that.
But now, we get along very well.
And even though it's hard to get in touch with her, because all she does is Twitters.
Oh, Twitter, yes.
It's very popular.
Yeah, she's a Twitterer, and that's the only way I can get in contact with her.
I literally had to call my cousin and have her Twitter her, because I refused,
even though
now she's starting a campaign for me to join the Twitter family.
You don't Twitter, no.
I pick up the phone.
To me, the phone just seems to be fine.
Here, I guess this is what we were talking about.
That's the inauguration, am I right there?
Yes.
Yeah, the inaugural ball.
Inauguration issue night, January 20th, 2009.
Well, that's great that you were able to relive that over and over again.
And what a great night for, well, everyone, really, in the world, when you
think about
it.
And then this was, and they gave you an extra grand if you do this, I
understand.
Is that what happened?
Wow, that's, you know what?
Give me an extra thousand dollars if you put on a harness and fly around.
There he goes again.
Yeah, stop it.
Now, what exactly is happening here?
This, I actually, I have to, unfortunately, be in this harness every night.
I fly around every night on my tour.
Well, that's part of your show.
It is a part of my show.
Wow.
And you travel with your own flying guys, right?
You don't, it's not like local guys.
It's the same people every night.
Same people every night, yeah.
And the first night, they actually kind of crashed me into the stairs.
Look at this.
So, we crashed you into the stairs.
Yeah, we had to, you know, it takes rehearsal.
I didn't imagine that would happen, but I get, I get bruised up.
And, you know, that wasn't cool, but I don't mind getting, you know.
Well, good luck to tour.
What's the first day to the tour?
And then you're back in North America on Father's Day here in New York City.
But the first day to the tour is when and where?
The first day is in two days.
And it's in Croatia.
Oh, Croatia.
Yes.
Wow.
I've never performed there.
It'll be my first time.
So, this really is like a global experience for you, isn't it?
It is.
Yeah, what a great way to see the world, then.
Thank you.
Now, let's talk about the film, Obsessed, opens on Friday.
So, you really have everything happening now, don't you?
I do.
You get the film.
You get the tour.
Tell people about the film.
It's a creepy psychodrama thriller with creepy people in the movie.
It's actually a very sexy thriller.
Right.
And, um...
Well, there's some creepiness.
I mean, honest to God.
Is it creepy?
Oh, were you telling me that that woman ain't creepy?
She's a little creepy in the movie.
Yes, she is.
And gets creepier as the movie goes on, don't you think?
I mean, it is.
I mean, she's kind of a stalker.
I guess so.
She's a little creepy.
Yeah, yeah.
But I get to fight, and it's my first time doing something ever, ever in fight
scenes
in a movie, and I really, really enjoyed it because I'm a lover, and I got to
let out
all of my aggressions.
That's for you.
Right.
Well, see, you proved my point because if the woman wasn't creepy, there'd be
no fight.
I guess you're right.
If it was something you could just talk over, that'd be fine.
She's so creepy, you gotta slam some sense of...
Oh, should we maybe...
Show the clip.
Yeah, let's see the clip.
You know what it's gonna be here?
Yes, this is when I find the creepy woman in my bedroom in my husband's shirt.
It is kind of creepy now that I think about it.
Yeah, take a look.
Obsessed.
Buddy!
You see what I'm saying?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I don't know.
It's called Obsessed.
I wish I had a nickel for every time I called the house and that was going on.
It opens on Friday, and the world tour begins in a couple of days in Croatia,
and later on
the program tonight, you're coming back to sing a song from right here.
Right there.
I am.
I am.
Right there.
Okay.
Oh.
Oh, my God.
We'll be right back, everybody.
Thank you so much.
Good to see you.
Good to see you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.