Name: Viewer Mail: Dave Lets The Audience Decide What Happens On The Show | Letterman
Uploaded: 2022-07-14T15:55:03.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Viewer Mail: Dave Lets The Audience Decide What Happens On The Show | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-07-14. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Viewer Mail: Dave Lets The Audience Decide What Happens On The Show | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-07-14. Transcript available.

all right let's get to our viewer mail we got a big show want to make sure
everybody gets in nobody
gets their feelings hurt big big show viewer mail here comes the theme leave
the room
henry mancini
you know henry mancini called last week and he includes this now
in his where he performs around the show and he said it's so popular yeah that
he's uh he's going
to put out sheet music of it really yes and he wants to know if he can use my
picture on the sheet
music isn't that nice are you gonna let him use your picture sure sure that's
great yeah it doesn't
bother him that i don't care for the song so why i just okay uh dear dave i'm
appalled you need to
have the names of guests and your jokes written on cue cards shows a disturbing
lack of dedication to
your profession come on dave we your fans deserve better than that concerned
mark r schubert uh
pittsburgh pennsylvania all right thank you very much man listen listen mark
where where exactly
where the hell do you get off telling me how to run my show you know mark it's
jerks like you
it's jerks like you kevin it's jerks like you that really really annoy me so
there pal
uh by the way if we need them paul we got cannons full of pre-embargo grapes
back there
just in case we need if we need them you don't fire those needlessly though i
just graduated from
high school and now must decide what to do with my life well i know that
feeling uh i figure my options
are as follows a go to college b get a job c bum off my parents until they kick
me out any suggestions
johnny drew wichita kansas you know these are uh attractive choices johnny with
much to be said for each but
i would like to suggest another idea take a look at this film now that's being
shown in community
centers and church basements across america
graduation day you could go to college get a job or just hang around the house
or you could take a tip from some of america's most influential men commit a
serious crime and get
yourself sent to a federal minimum security prison whether you choose lompoc atlanta
or allenwood
you'll find pleasant surroundings and amiable companions at a price far below
college tuition
in fact it's free tennis anyone or maybe your game is golf either way you'll be
filling out a foursome
with captains of industry government officials and high-ranking members of
organized crime
influential men who will help your career for years to come so when you're
ready to take that
first step into the world consider america's federal prisons it worked for me
it might work for you
a message from the u.s department of justice
but i thought the production value was nice
uh letter number three uh dear dave since your show has gotten so boring i've
started riding my
exercise bike in front of the tv to pass the time while viewing your show i've
gotten into shape and
feel great thanks dave from me and my cardiovascular system a fan carol barker
columbia missouri oh boy
this is troubling carol i'm very sorry you feel that way paul uh what is the
show getting boring is
that the deal what do you think paul paul what excuse me
the show getting boring oh no the show looks it looks great from here it really
does thank you very
run for your lives letter number four uh dear david for several years god has
given me the ability
to write some of the most beautiful love poems i've read in my entire life
i've had a chance to recite some of them on several civic and professional
occasions with 100
acceptance by my audience all this has led me at this time to ask your
permission to recite at least
two of my exciting poems on your late night show i feel you and your audience
will be thrilled
to this recital uh sincerely ears glendale seymour elizabeth city north carolina
well this is a very
nice letter uh we were sort of touched by this so we invited glendale to come
up here to new york
city is she here glendale hi glendale how are you nice to see you thank you
very much for coming
up all the way from north carolina uh but in doing so ladies and gentlemen we
also believe
that it's important for our studio audience to have a choice in what actually
happens here on the
show a choice in what they see so now ladies and gentlemen by your applause you
tell us would you
rather see and hear glendale reading her poems or would you rather see a fat
guy jump into a hammock full
full of eggs here we go all right let's vote now here's the audience applause
meter okay first for glendale
would you like to hear the poems okay now fine how about the fat guy jumping
into the hammock
i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry ma'am it it was very close glendale thank you for
coming up here nice meeting you
uh okay is everyone ready over there anton here we go a fat guy into a hammock
full of eggs
all right all right okay yes i've said it once i've said it a hundred times
that's comedy isn't it
uh we got a great show oh jack cover here from the baltimore aquarium with odd
little
lizards and stuff will be joining us also chaka khan and ellen green come on
back folks