Name: Kirstie Alley Really Tried To Keep "Cheers" From Ending | Letterman
Uploaded: 2022-12-06T02:07:31.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Kirstie Alley Really Tried To Keep "Cheers" From Ending | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-12-06. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Kirstie Alley Really Tried To Keep "Cheers" From Ending | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-12-06. Transcript available.

Let's bring out our first guest, a lovely woman, fine actress on the big hit
show of the decade, Cheers, and they're going off the air in May, I guess.
Our first guest is a lovely woman. She will be ending a six-year relationship
with this network right here, NBC, when Cheers appears for the final time on
May 20th.
Ladies and gentlemen, here she is, Kirstie Alley.
Look at what a smart couple we make here in our sort of navy blue dark suit and
jacket.
Looks like we're going to go out and cause trouble, doesn't it?
It could.
I'll join you in a second. I have to run somebody home first.
How are you?
Good.
Welcome to the show. Welcome to New York City.
Thank you.
This is, are you a little raspy, a little losing your voice a little bit?
Saturday Night Live this week and they've written me these skits where I'm
screaming through the whole thing, so it blew my voice out.
Well, Senor, that's bad because it may not come back. What'll happen then if
you have no voice?
Then I'll have to change the skits somewhat.
Somewhat? I would say completely.
The loud family will be the quiet family. It's scary.
Let's talk a little bit about Cheers. What do you think about this? How did you
feel about it when you heard it?
Why is, why is it ending? Because it's still in the top ten every week.
It's ending because Ted is old.
Ted dancing is too old.
His hands aren't steady anymore. He can't pour those drinks.
That's a shame. I didn't realize that.
It's sad.
Yeah, it is very, very sad.
How did you feel about it when you first realized things were going to go away?
I felt very sad and I spent Christmas crying and so I came up with this plan,
though.
I thought, you know, why do I have to be the effect of this?
I'll rally. I'll go back and I'll pitch the idea that we come back next season.
We do six shows. We go out with style and class.
Right.
And we don't let the fans down. We don't, we sort of wean ourselves.
So I called a meeting. First time I'd done this in six years of all the actors
and the director and they're all sitting there.
I had a nice speech down.
And I said, um, now look, I think we should do six more shows.
I think that it's really important that we, that we wean ourselves because it
was so degrading.
And they looked at me. It was like some really, it was like a group therapy
session where people were saying this literally, go with it.
They just thought you were nuts. Is that what it was?
Let it out.
And they said, no. And I was really degrading. And then I thought, screw you
people are old.
I am young. I still have a career.
Kind of interested in that self weaning process, though. You described a few
times there.
I was. Weaning away.
So what will you do now? And the show has been filmed. It's over, right?
It's pretty much it. History.
Now we kept hearing here in New York City that Bill Clinton, President Bill
Clinton,
was going to be on the show. Was that ever true? Did he wasn't on the show?
Well, you know, I think he, I, he still may be. He was going to be.
Why? Well, he's got, he's got to have better things to do.
I know. He's old.
No, no, no. You can't say that about everything.
I, I can.
No.
He, he was going to, and then Hillary's father passed away.
And, um, that wouldn't look very good that he shows up on chairs.
Yeah.
So, um, they thought they would possibly reschedule.
And I haven't heard since. I don't.
Well, how do you work this into the plot that, oh my God, look, ladies and
gentlemen,
it's his limo breaks down out front or what?
No, you just go.
Just Bill walks in.
He just.
The president of the United States comes in for a beer and a shot.
The president can only come on your show if everything else is okay in this
world.
Then he can come on.
I know. I know.
And everything wasn't, so he couldn't.
Yeah.
So, but you know, it's just a gag, just a, obviously a big old bit.
You don't have to get snippy with me.
Uh, and what will you do now?
You're doing Saturday Night Live this weekend, so that's a lot of fun.
You're going to do SNL.
And then what are you going to do for your, you're going into films, back into
films?
What are you going to do?
I'll tell you what I would like to do.
I'd like to become sort of a cross between an interior designer and a spiritual
advisor
for wayward actresses who just don't know what's going on.
Your phone will be ringing off the hook.
The specific actress that I'd like to help, and I think this woman is beautiful
and talented
and everything, but God help her.
Sharon Stone does not know what people are doing to her.
Yeah.
She's getting dad advice?
She's in a movie with her legs like this, and she's saying, Paul, Paul, the
camera isn't,
you're not showing anything here, are you?
And Paul is saying, no, I just have a little glare.
And then, you know, the guy with the marker, the measuring tape comes, like,
measuring in
here.
But Paul, and then she does all this, you know, and then totally, I mean, like,
you know, an
80-foot V, and that's not, it's not that that's bad or anything that she did
that, but she
just didn't know she was doing it.
And then on the cover of Vanity Fair, she looked like this.
And it wasn't that that was bad, because I thought that's very artistic, it's
very stylish,
but in the next interview, she said, I didn't know Annie Leibis was shooting me
from the
front.
She may not really have in her mind a definite idea of what a camera looks like.
You know, maybe it's just as simple as it.
But she was in the movie Total Recall, she has no recall.
I think it's possible that, you know, and I think maybe, like, her new
boyfriend is her
fiance, maybe she didn't know he was married.
Another mix-up.
But I think that I have a value.
She needs some help.
You would be as, like, a Mother Teresa for this one.
I can say, okay, when that camera is in there, beelining it on your V, you're
going to get
a picture of that.
I'm not saying any words.
There's no words.
Ooh, man.
Makes you want to kick a field goal, and I don't know, I don't even know what
that means,
by the way, I'm just your TV friend.
All right, Kirstie, listen.
Oh, no, you're not leaving.
Oh, you get me a little upset here with all this discussion.
No, no, she's not leaving.
I think it took a great deal of courage, and I applaud you for having said that,
what you
did.
And I appreciate it.
I think people appreciate it.
Tell me about your, you have a baby.
Yeah.
You know, Paul's got a brand new baby as well.
Yeah, I know.
Isn't it fun?
Nice to see you, Kirstie.
That can mean peace.
I love it.
That can mean peace, too.
Isn't it the best?
It's wonderful.
The best.
Paul had the late night baby.
It feels like it's the show baby, like it's all of ours.
It's, doesn't it?
It's great.
It's a very exciting feeling.
That's how it was on Cheers.
I took my baby to work with me every day, and he was sort of adopted by
everybody.
It was wonderful.
How old is the baby now?
Six months.
Six months.
That's a great age, isn't it?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And can you tell us his name?
William True.
William True.
True.
Puritan name.
True is the middle name, the last name?
It's the middle name, but I call him True as his first name.
Yeah.
It's a Puritan name.
It's a, my husband's family had a whole line of, we got out the family tree,
and there
were all these Puritan names, you know.
There was actually one called Free Love.
No.
Really?
Free Love.
From what year?
This is like in this century, earlier?
This was before they came over on the old Mayflower, right after the Mayflower.
Where'd they come from?
I don't know.
Well.
England.
Well, yeah, let's figure out where did the Mayflower sail from.
I think it was England.
Yeah, all right.
Somewhere in England they live.
They were pilgrims.
Uh-huh.
We have this fight all the time, because my husband's sort of this blue blood
guy, and
this is very funny, because-
Who's your husband?
Let's just establish it.
Parker Stevenson.
Parker Stevenson.
Yes.
What, he's on a rowing team?
That's not what she meant.
An Olympic oarsman, apparently.
Yeah, no, that's not, no.
Oh, that's not what she meant.
No, Parker.
And Parker's family, what are they called?
They're in the social register.
Social register.
And I think that means if you came across with the original pilgrims, your
descendants get
to be in this book.
Mm-hmm.
So this is really funny, because my descendants on my mother's side were carnies,
and I'm from
Kansas.
From an actual carnival?
Yeah.
Really?
Yeah.
And my grandmother had this cigarette stand, and my grandfather had this snake
pit.
And Roy had the snake pit, and my mother, they had all these boa constrictors
in there, and
they would throw my mother in there.
This was part of the act, right?
Yes.
Yeah.
They'd throw my mother in there, and she'd go, uh, uh, uh, and then all the
audience would
go, uh, uh, and that's what they would get for their money.
So, by me marrying Parker, my name is now in the social register.
Cool.
But I don't think the people that accepted us knew that my mother was in a
snake pit.
But let me tell you something.
When the pilgrims left England, that was the kind of action they were looking
for.
That's, that's what it was all about.
That was the whole point of the trip.
I agree.
Yes, sir.
Oh, man, I'm worried about your voice.
It's, it's sort of one of those situations where it's difficult to listen to
you because
it sounds like you're in pain.
Do you want me to shut up?
No, no, no, no.
I'm, I'm, I have only your best interest at heart.
Are you going to be all right for that?
I'm fine, really.
Who else is on the show Saturday night?
Who is the music?
Uh, Lenny Kravitz.
He's really cute.
He's totally cute.
You know, I've only seen him with...
He's totally cute.
You sound like you're 11.
Now, come on.
He is.
I had never met him, and I just did this promo with him.
And he had these sunglasses on.
And why are these guys always weigh four pounds?
He, they have legs that are like 12 feet tall, and they're really, they have no
meat, they're
no fat or anything.
And he was standing beside me, and he has these long, long dreadlocks, and we
started to roll,
and he took off his glasses.
And I, I wasn't looking at him, I was looking at the monitor, and I went, oh,
my God.
Yeah.
Oh, my, and I looked around, I was like, oh, God, oh, God.
Yeah.
I am a sucker for these guys.
Maybe we'd like, maybe we'd like to get him in the boat, huh?
you bet nasty you you are nothing but trouble you are eight days of trouble
uh let's see cheers we'll all be looking for this it'll be a sad night in america
it is may 20th the
final episode of cheers and saturday night the woman will be hosting saturday
night live good
to see you again kirstie thank you very much kirstie allie good job we'll be
right back