Name: John Witherspoon Is Living Large | Letterman
Uploaded: 2023-01-16T15:54:48.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'John Witherspoon Is Living Large | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-01-16. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'John Witherspoon Is Living Large | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-01-16. Transcript available.

our next guest is one of the non-wayans brothers stars of the television show
the wayans brothers
on december 26th this man will be performing at the taft theater in cincinnati
ohio here's our
good friend john witherspoon nice to see you how you doing buddy fine fine how
was your boy you look
good you look oh thank you you look like you're happening you know what i'm
saying well i don't
know about happening uh this is a new jacket i just put it on i just took the
tabs off i started
where the tabs on because i wasn't sure if i was going to keep it yeah you know
you wear it and
then you take it back oh no i didn't know that is that what you do you do a lot
of i've done it a
couple of times how was your thanksgiving wonderful yeah what'd you do anything
good
wonderful time and you know you took we took the family out you and the family
went out we had
dinner restaurant oh that's nice you know about restaurant you go out you don't
have dinner at
home no we wanted to try something new this year it was my idea yeah where'd
you go a place called uh sam's
uh-huh have a nice time yeah but you know my problem is uh tipping i don't know
what is the etiquette
of tipping it's just like uh for me it's like 40 40 40 you better come on sit
down eat 40 of my food
what do you do you know i'm a blue-collar man uh-huh blue-collar people don't
give them 40
you know and they steal the spoons and forks and things
but now the chauffeur i was in a limousine so now the chauffeur's gonna get we
went to stay at a place
two or three days the chauffeur gonna give my bags to the doormen the doormen
give my bags to the
bellhop right you know i don't know who to tip i ain't giving all three of them
no tip just because
of this little ring around the roses they doing no you gotta tip everybody sure
everybody that touches
your bags gets oh no no like a hundred dollar bill like a c-note i said when y'all
stop playing
ring around the rosary here's a dollar for somebody
musical chairs with your luggage yeah i'll get finished but you're doing you're
doing well you're
making a lot of dough you're the tv star and stuff you're movie star you're
making a lot of money how
you doing financially may i ask well now you know when i was here before yeah i
told you and i told the
the world i was a multi-thousandare wow since then i have uh i've uh saved my
money yeah avoided people
who like to borrow right now i'm a multi-fifty thousandaire thank you very much
it's okay a multi
yeah that is that now with that uh affluence must come a lot of pressure that's
the kind of thing that
can work on your mind well i'm not happy you know i should be happy you should
be i thought i'd be
happy if i'm a multi-fifty thousandaire of course let me tell you my accountant
told me miss debbie
hill told me i'm sorry debbie hill is your account debbie hill yeah is that one
of the big eight
yeah the night we're calling the secret in the central city there she said mr
with us but we must get
some write-offs right if you don't yeah don't live a first-class life the
government gonna take your
money i said how did government go take my money he wasn't there helping me
make this money no that's right
so now i gotta live first class you gotta live a first class i fly first class
now i'm perfectly
happy flying coach yeah i get my ticket 21 days ahead l.a new york new york l.a
275 dollars pretty
good deal pretty sweet yeah of course i got it 21 days ahead right had my
ticket at my house over three
weeks all right yeah so now since i missed a big shot i gotta fly first class
of course the government
gonna take the money yeah so i'm at the airport my hands sweating i spent
twenty five hundred dollars
for a ticket now that's great yeah and on the same plane two seats back from
where i was before oh
now i'm on for now they they board the plane yeah and the guy says all people
uh with uh small children
right and old people who needs a special assistance and board sure i beat all
them on the plane yeah
i hurled the kids now i'm in first class nobody there but me i'm the first one
on the plane sure
i'm on first class they knew they got you you know you're a fool they you spend
twenty five hundred
dollars do the same thing i did before twenty five hundred from l.a new york
new york l.a
twenty five hundred dollars she's laughing at you you want some champagne
before you take off i said
yeah and leave the bottle how about the food how about the meal service you
know they give you
more they you know the peanuts they feed you like to give you these little
peanuts you know peanuts and
it's a beautiful little tray and you got on the other side you got little uh
crackers that made like
fish i don't know what that's all about yeah so i'm beating my peanuts and i'm
looking at these peanuts
saying it's about a dollar a peanut so i put the peanuts in my mouth i save
with every peanut you
know tossing it around getting the flavor
like a connoisseur yeah like a connoisseur and apparently i'm lagging behind
the service you
know i'm holding my peanuts a little too long i see she's coming to me are you
going to finish those
peanuts i say you damn right i'm telling you and i'm going to take this little
bowl with me too when
i'm finished now they give you to give you yes i took the menu cost five twenty
five hundred dollars
i've owned this menu i think they just take what they got now they just said
they have dining upon
request option oh oh yes a complete meal presented all at once shortly after
takeoff or later in the
flight whenever you prefer if you choose our dine upon request option and wish
to dine as soon as
possible please notify the attendant ring my bell she said when do you like to
eat that as soon as those
wheels leave the ground bring me my food yeah and i eat while the wheels when
they when they're
reaching 35 000 feet i'm eating i'm eating while the movie is on i'm eating
while they're getting ready
to land when the wheels come down i got something in my mouth eating make the
most out of it trying to get
and i'm the last one off the plane yeah of course you are uh half theater in cincinnati
the day after
christmas yes and then the next day december 27th at the paramount theater in
seattle happy holidays
oh thank you good to see look at my son oh look at that
there you go my god how old is this one right here he's uh about 20 months now
20 months and how old
are you i'm 55 i make my own grandchildren
you