Name: Jeffrey Ross Makes His Network TV Debut | Letterman
Uploaded: 2023-01-27T23:07:19.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Jeffrey Ross Makes His Network TV Debut | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-01-27. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Jeffrey Ross Makes His Network TV Debut | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-01-27. Transcript available.

our next guest is a very funny young comedian who will be opening the new
improv at harrah's
in las vegas may 2nd through the 7th making his network television debut ladies
and gentlemen a
nice welcome for jeffrey ross jeff
yeah oh man
i got five minutes
this is so exciting man the david letterman show new york city
oh i'm from new jersey
i'm not proud of it there's only one advantage to being born and raised in new
jersey when you're
born and raised there you become immune to the stench i'm on the jersey turnpike
last
week with my friend who's not from jersey he's like what the hell is that what
is that toxic waste
garbage i'm like waffles
belgian waffles right there
i love living in new york now i live here i'm walking around down you see the
coolest stuff
i saw angelo lansbury today in an antique shop 800 bucks
i love you guys
i call up my friend right check it out my friend's answer machine message still
says to leave your name
and number does anybody here still not know what to do are people leaving other
data instead call
me back right away my address is 300 mercer street my favorite food is corn
hurry up
my favorite film is octopussy call me back you ever hear this one you ever hear
this speak clearly after the tone
hey phil guess who died wah wah wah wah wah wah wah wah wah wah that's right phil
charlie brown's teacher died
my sister has a doleman pincher i love dogs you should know that but i hate
this dog because he uh
he snapped at me one time so now when she goes to work during the day i call up
her answering machine
i leave the dog messages to make him crazy come on boy you want to go for a
walk where's the leash come
on baby
who's at the door go see who's at the door
oh this is fun man i want to try an impression i only i only do one impression
follow me can i borrow your bag
all right my only impression i worked really hard on it i hope you guys like it
okay it's
my only impression this is called this is called waiting for the school bus in
seventh grade
oh man i feel so relieved i was so nervous last night the show i couldn't sleep
i turned the tv on i'm watching hee-haw at four in the morning
they still make hee-haw you remember that show the only thing worse than
country music is country
comedy people used to jump out of the grass for no reason at all i smell skunk
right back into
the grass remember that that show grows on you though it's contagious though it
grows on you
i was watching with my sister one time and halfway through the show we were
making out
i'm kidding
i'm kidding
i would never ever i would never watch hee-haw
you guys cheered me up man my ex-girlfriend married some other guy not too long
ago
you probably know her pamela anderson from baywalk
i'm just kidding but did you see her in playboy how hot was she in playboy
my friend called me up he goes jeff pamela anderson's the new playboy did you
read it i said read it i
ruined it
let me try something change your mood i wrote i wrote a couple love poems i
want to try them on you guys
i hope you like it this one's called becky i said
becky i said you're the girl for me becky i said you're the world to me
becky i said will you marry me jeff she said my name's karen
let me try another one
i'm cheating here i didn't write this one this is one that my dad wrote for my
mom
it's called enough with the bread already
your smile blooms like a bright summer flower
your hair flows down like a soft rain shower your eyes are like open seas blue
from coast to coast
so how come your ass looks like a truck
enough with the bread already
wait wait wait wait wait
here's the last one i don't mean to leave you on a sad one but it means a lot
to me
it's a love poem it's called i miss her sometimes
i ran into my old girlfriend yesterday then i backed up and ran into her again
i miss her sometimes
thank you very much
ladies gentlemen we're desperately short on time we've been ordered off the air
jeffrey great job
really very wonderful nice to meet you please do me a favor and come back and
see us often i hope
so man have fun in las vegas jeffrey ross my thanks also to bob costas and penna
teller i'm
sorry pan and teller and bailiff fleck we'll see you tomorrow night thanks for
watching good night everybody
time for pants