Name: Dave Talks To A Dallas Luggage Store | Letterman
Uploaded: 2023-06-20T22:00:07.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Dave Talks To A Dallas Luggage Store | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-06-20. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Dave Talks To A Dallas Luggage Store | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-06-20. Transcript available.

you're looking at a man with a heavy heart here um we had we had a great idea
uh here's what the
idea was going to be we had a uh a satellite and we had a camera crew in the uh
beautiful city of
dallas texas and we were going to watch uh luggage on the the luggage carousels
at uh the southwest
terminal originally it was going to be american airlines and then american
airlines in the middle
of this labor action right because they acquired they merged with a an airline
known as reno air
yeah you know if you love to gamble reno air yeah so american airlines said no
you can't do it
because of this labor action okay so southwest airline said sure be happy to
have you and your
late show camera come down there and take a look at luggage as it you know goes
around on the conveyor
belt and we'll chat with people we'll just walk up behind them and we'll just
kind of look at their
luggage with them that'd be nice it'd be you know fun it's believe me it's
breakthrough television and
uh so we were all set to go and then late last night the city of dallas said no
you're kidding
it ain't happening we don't want you we don't want you coming down here making
fun of other people's
luggage i see they apparently have had a lot of luggage trouble in dallas were
you aware of that
really a lot of people making fun of luggage yeah that's right so they said you
can't uh you can't do
it well you know that leaves us uh you know kind of we're screwed because we
got the equipment we got
the crew we got everything so uh here's what we decided we would do and i don't
know uh undeniably
this is kind of a fallback position and it may not be as power packed uh minute
for minute uh
your entertainment buck you're not getting as much bang out of this idea as you
were the other one
yeah yeah but we found a luggage store in the dallas area like a store found a
luggage store in the
dallas area and we're just gonna spend a few minutes having the people in the
store tell us about the
luggage in the store it's the best we could do turn on the satellite turn on
the camera here we go
all the way down to dallas texas ladies and gentlemen live via satellite and we're
going
into a place called the preston luggage and gifts there there it is right there
preston luggage and
gifts all right we'll go on inside
yes oh i wonder are they open there it is ladies and gentlemen it's our first
breathtaking glimpse of
preston you'll come for the luggage you'll stay for the gifts
this uh i'm told this woman's name is kathy lind is that right kathy can you
that's correct yes i can
hi nice to have you with us i'm dave letterman we uh we do a tv show here in
new york city and
thank you very much for your help i know this is all very last minute and i yes
it is how can i
help you how you doing i'm doing fine a little nervous are you a little nervous
please please do
not be nervous all right let's do some deep breathing you want to do a little
deep breathing
here we go you want me hyperventilate yeah a little deep breathing here we go
how can i help you yeah yeah
trying to make friends you know trying to make friends wherever i go doing a
nice job i was the only
one deep i was deep breathing all right uh kathy how long have you been in the
luggage business
there i've been here for 12 years 12 years and where exactly are you what part
of dallas are you
located it's called preston center area it's northwest highway and preston road
hey originally
from the dallas area i'm really originally from shreveport louisiana shreveport
louisiana just
over the state line there down down on the gulf is that right uh no not really
the gulf
shreveport's not on the gulf of mexico no it's not okay i'll take your word for
it okay
kathy kathy so right behind you is shoplifting
uh-oh all right it's star time if you if you press the silent alarm
okay so shreveport where is shreveport is it in the middle is it anywhere near
baton rouge
yes it's right next door to it yeah all right so uh and then you moved to dallas
and you've been
in texas ever since and things are working out pretty well for you yes it is
yeah doing well
uh you know now kathy you know what the original idea was going to be we were
going out to uh we're
going to go out to love field
kathy uh-huh could you ask that gentleman if if he's going to clean his nails
to go in the back room
who is that guy uh this is uh salesperson al crudova hey al how you doing buddy
nice to see you
al al you can tell by looking at him is salesman of the month absolutely
absolutely how long you've
been in luggage al there we go how long you've been luggage uh six years you
enjoy it do you enjoy it
oh yes very much you work straight sales or commission it's uh both
all right well i know you're busy we won't keep you
so now kathy here was the deal we were going to go to love field uh the airport
one of the airports
there in the dallas area and we were going to watch a luggage come down on the
the baggage carousel you
know you whenever you travel you've seen that right oh yes well uh the city of
dallas said no you can't
do that we'd rather not have you doing that it poses a security threat i guess
and we said okay
sure we don't want to make trouble so you were nice enough to let us into your
luggage store there so
if you can i'll ask you some questions about luggage and then if you will just
if you can show
us take us you and al take us through the world of luggage okay all right now
first of all let me ask
you about your line do you carry the samsonite yes we do do you carry the
american tourister no we do
not what's the problem with american tourister um there's no problem with it we
just carry a little
bit the higher end the better quality i see
so so samsonite you're saying samson is pretty good stuff it's the higher end
stuff no no it's more
more the medium of the road okay all right how about lark do you carry any of
the lark lark is owned by
samsonite uh-huh okay louis vuitton louis vuitton oh we don't have louis vuitton
but that's the
very top of the line now here's something i know the kids like of the kipling
do you have those kipling
bags you have any of that uh no but we do have uh some of the tumi line oh yeah
yeah got it right down
here yeah yes universal traveler no uh travel pro yes we do uh acme no i just
made that up i didn't
think it was on the list kathy let me talk to uh let me talk to al let me let
me talk to al just for
a second is out you call him right in there i'll come in here let me talk to
you for a second here
al where are you buddy hi al here al when you when you're looking at a long day
maybe around the
holidays what makes what makes your job easy what what line of luggage do you
like to move what sells
itself my friend what do you prefer what do you think sells the easiest for you
what kind of luggage oh
uh to me luggage just you'd have to go with the to me it's an easy sale for me
easy sale good
all right okay all right now uh if you guys can now just show us some of the
luggage you have there
in stock all right here we go paul anton a little luggage viewing music
whatever you have the overnight
case the two-suiter the the makeup the happy oh look at that that's pretty good
what are we looking
at there kathy um we've got our teamy line through here oh that's nice looking
stuff yeah it's made out
of a ballistic nylon and they all got your pull-up handles now you say
ballistic nylon yes which is a very
durable nylon does that mean that it's bulletproof no yeah but it came from the
general idea of that
but it is very durable nylon very durable uh-huh al al where'd al go he's over
here he's coming over
here and i said what does this particular item go for this one is for 550. uh-huh
550 and it's guaranteed
yes it's guaranteed against workman deep uh defects very nice al do me a favor
you jump in there and
take one go ahead you pull out one and yeah you go ahead and you explain it go
nuts al make this sale
come on yeah sell me al come on beat me up okay go ahead and sell it to him put
me over the curb get
me in traffic okay it's made out of the most durable uh nylon that they make it's
uh got the best hardware
it's got the best guarantee in in the market al let me ask you a crucial
question for the seasoned
traveler what about those zippers what about those zippers what about those zippers
the zippers are like everything else i've got the best manufacturer they got
the best uh zippers
zippers did he cover the zippers they've got the best all right al thank you
very much great job
thank you very much and kathy thank you kathy lynn down there at preston
luggage who gets nice job
good to see you guys thank you shreveport louisiana right there from the texas
there's uh
no there's louisiana and there is a texas right on the line i was uh i'm sorry
i stand corrected
shreveport you think it'd be down on the port like port arthur which is right
down
ah honest mistake yeah now here's something also uh if you're looking for
travel tips way to make your
travel easier take a look at al the luggage salesman take a look at the length
of al's tie you see
now he did that al did that for a reason yeah when you when you're got a lot of
bags and you're
traveling you're running through the airport you put one bag in one hand one in
the left hand and then
you tie one to your to the tie so you can actually hook one up and then race
salesman of the month
texas keep selling that luggage my friend okay uh the category denied ladies
and gentlemen what
dumb guys think y2k is you know that thing the y2k deal uh uh the problem the
computers 1999 2000
everybody will explode here now top 10 list of what dumb guys think y2k is here
we go number 10
that adorable little robot from star wars
number nine the main ingredient in slim jims number eight something robert downey
jr smokes
number seven the all-girl version of it in sync number six nickname of dallas
cowboys linebacker ray
y2kowitz number five what today's episode of sesame street was brought to you
by
number four i don't know but i think puff daddy produced his album number three
that's stuff in chinese food that makes you sleepy number two the average chest
size of a hooters employee
and now the number one thing dumb guys think y2k is
from preston luggage and gifts in dallas texas here's al
that annoying song by the village people
you