Name: James Earl Jones Describes Fireworks Over The Phone | Letterman
Uploaded: 2023-07-04T15:04:55.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'James Earl Jones Describes Fireworks Over The Phone | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-07-04. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'James Earl Jones Describes Fireworks Over The Phone | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-07-04. Transcript available.

yes what are you doing what are you sir well i had you know i had to go to the
dentist yesterday
oh did you yeah and it's and god bless the the dentist they've made it so much
better than it
used to be it used to really hurt because when i was a kid and i would go to
the dentist the only
dental tools they had would be like a hammer right yeah uh and and now
everything's fairly
well painless long except i uh uh i always have this problem i go in there with
the bite i've had
for like the last 20 or 30 years i'm used to that bite you know what i'm
talking about you know the
way your teeth hit each other yeah and you get comfortable with that and you
don't like to have
to think about your bite because it's just there you enjoy a lovely sandwich it
bite takes care of it
so then now i go to the dentist and i had a thing done and they put a thing in
that wasn't there
before and then they buzzed it down and buzzed it down and buzzed it down and
so and so now i have
the bite of somebody else that's right and so all all day long i'm doing that
driving myself crazy
and the guy says oh no six weeks it'll be fine oh well i'll i'll be in a i'll
be a mental case in six
weeks every two seconds i'm checking my bite go ahead check your bite right now
ladies gentlemen
everybody let me see you check your bite is everybody's bite okay mine's a
little off okay all
right well see me upstairs later then thank you uh on the program tonight piedmont
bird callers now
here's a great thing now this started uh years yes
this started day years ago with johnny carson and it's kids from piedmont high
school in piedmont
california and they have a competition each year and each kid gets a bird that
they have to imitate
imitate the call of the bird and then they have the big uh piedmont bird
championships and we have
winning teams from uh the piedmont bird calling uh championships here tonight
yes
you know what it is it's a crowd pleaser it's a crowd pleaser people love it i'll
say one thing for
this particular bite that i have right now at least i don't whistle oh remember
there was a time when
i got a new bite and i whistled for two or three days yeah yeah and then
factories would knock off for
lunch every time every time every time i started speaking right in the room
wait a minute was that the
noon whistle let's go let's go yeah uh also on the show this evening a very
talented actor in a fine
motion picture uh luke wilson alex and emma
wow that hit the spot whoa nelly what do you have in there it's just uh water
really
now luke wilson is it comes from an acting family he has a brother owen wilson
and he has another brother
whose name escapes me momentarily the the oldest of the three and then uh of
course uh their father flip
all right all right bite down and grind bite
okay and bite and grind
all right rinse and spit sorry you got to go through that there's nothing worse
yeah there's
nothing worse nothing worse yeah you'll never your bite will never return
really you know that yeah
you'll never have your bite i'm sorry everything shifts you you'll never get
your original bite back
you'll get a new bite a new bite yeah because everything will shift around and
then you get the
dreaded tmj the temporal mandibular joint disorder yeah well who doesn't have
that yeah exactly you're
telling me telling me you're telling me something i don't know my friend yeah
uh yeah yeah yeah's are
here tonight talented young here they are fever to tell yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah yes yeah so that's
the big show and because uh the fourth of july that is just around the corner
and when i say just
around the corner i mean sometime next week i don't know what day it is on the
phone standing by
here all night long and i think this is going to be great we have the great james
earl jones
right here on that's right thank you
he will all night long be describing be describing fireworks
that's that's it let's listen here what do you mean that's it
that's that's plenty are you kidding me this is fantastic well all right let's
see what happens all
right a brilliant explosion of green and white a cascade of gold punctuated
with silver sparks
a shimmering symphony of red and blues a whistle then a very loud pop
all right
this is this is something that's gotten to be pretty exciting uh our president
george w bush whenever
he goes out on a speaking engagement he likes to open with a joke or
incorporate a joke in his remarks
and and we've been kind of following him and and it seems to us that that he he
tells jokes that may
be in the structure or style of a joke but perhaps aren't really actually jokes
so we've put together a
little segment called george w bush joke that's not really a joke he tells it
like a joke he looks like
he thinks it's a joke but we're not sure that it's actually a joke here now george
w bush joke that's not really a joke watch
i appreciate your state auditor she along with tim traveled uh from the airport
there was no road rage today
what is he talking about i love that
a blazing spiral of student glory a syncopated cacophony of light and sound a
regal blast of purple and
oh dear lord my pants are on fire
well we've lost him momentarily i'll say i'm i'm sure he's fine how about
another one of those george w
bush jokes that's not really right i think this one i think this one is one of
the better ones
we've done in a while oh really here we go george w bush joke that's not a joke
it's another one take a look
a lot of those checks are going to be on the mail to you for the differential
this july
and some of them like to say in washington the checks in the mail
and some of them like to say in the mail