Name: Michelle Pfeiffer Reveals Her Beauty Queen Past | Letterman
Uploaded: 2023-10-24T22:13:39.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Michelle Pfeiffer Reveals Her Beauty Queen Past | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-10-24. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Michelle Pfeiffer Reveals Her Beauty Queen Past | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-10-24. Transcript available.

our first guest is an academy award nominated actress who stars in a new film
entitled i am sam and opens december 28th here's the lovely michelle pfeiffer
wow nice to see you
well this is great
that's lovely that's very nice i want to say something here and i don't want to
be stupid about this and
forgive me if it seems untoward or clumsy but but i you know i've seen you in
in films and
and i've seen you on uh other shows and stuff and uh but i've never seen you
like like here and and oh
my god
you know what i mean
you just look fantastic oh well thank you and thank you for being on the show
can i get you anything
no i'm fine yeah well it's nice to have you here for heaven's sake maybe a
heater yeah we keep a little
we like to keep a little chilly are you guys freezing yeah you should you
should tell your
guests to dress in layers
now let's uh let's talk a little bit about things okay to try to break some ice
here um
you know we've wanted you to be on the show and after i saw in 88 the fabulous
baker brothers i just
thought oh oh my god can you get any better than this and that that's when i
really got excited about
well let's see and of course so we couldn't and now here here you are like 20
years later
uh and and and and i'm always interested because we don't want to repeat
mistakes we may have made
in the past was there a reason that we were unable to make this booking
straight away well
do you do you remember i was booked on the show and i and i didn't show up that's
right i do remember
that's like a year ago or something oh no no it was it was what was a while ago
um and and um i
thought you might be a little upset with me so it's taking me this long to get
my courage to oh well
you know that's very sweet but yeah i'm never i'm never serious about what what
did i say oh
i i don't know actually so you you thought you had irritated me i thought
perhaps i had irritated
you no no no i'm accustomed to women like you standing me up
let's talk about uh oh did you have a nice thanksgiving i did i had actually
had a fabulous
thanksgiving what did you do um i had my whole family came over and we we had
we had so
much food and um everybody got along and everybody nobody was fighting nobody
was feuding and uh it
was really lovely that sounds nice yeah good for you and normally are there
fights and feuds yeah
yeah yeah yeah but you know is i mean that's the the dynamic that i think makes
families
interesting don't you that they they have a very interesting family yeah yeah
um
tell me about what you did before you became a an actress in films i uh well i
had many jobs and uh
where were you born i was born in orange county and the last job i had the job
that i had uh while
i was pursuing acting was uh i worked at a supermarket i i worked in the
supermarket as well is that right
how old were you when you started the market um i was about uh 19 i think when
i started working at
the supermarket yeah and what did you do well they started me bagging i started
bagging yeah and then
i was a bad girl as well worked your way up worked my way up to i eventually
did uh it was in produce
yeah yeah i got that i never made it to produce and everything yeah yeah but it's
it's a good
experience isn't it yeah um but didn't weren't you a stock clerk at one point
yeah i stocked the shelves
and everything so so could you uh could you tie the stem of a maraschino cherry
with your tongue
you know that that wasn't required when i really no that never came up really
really you can do that
i thought all stock clerks not me no no siree the ones at vons did
at what point when you were working in the supermarket did you think oh maybe i
could be an
actress did you always think you could be an actress well my mother did given
my my dramatics as a child
but um it may have been her comments that drove me to it but um no i um i i had
always wanted to
when i and but it was uh so far from any kind of reality um where i grew up i
didn't know any actors
i didn't come from any kind of artistic background really per se and um uh i
was checking groceries one
day and um there was a woman who was arguing with me about the prices of her
cantaloupes and um
i know that woman yeah but i don't suppose she lived in leisure world no no no
no okay um different woman um so and i that was a turning point for me
had you had you had you done any acting like in high school i did um it was one
of the few classes i
actually attended yeah and um and i loved it um yeah what was the first thing
you were able to do then
professionally after you left the supermarket um well i think my well my first
acting job was one line on
fantasy island oh fantasy island yeah that used to be the thing with the plane
and the guy yeah it was
great yeah because you know what it was it was it was it was the guy paul the
guy how to no no the guy
yeah that's right yeah welcome to fantasy island and what was your line do you
recall who is he naomi
and there you go that's all you need to know you know what else is that star
face man that was an
entertaining movie yeah it's one of those where anytime you like one oh oh boy
whenever you see
like a glimpse of it when they run it on a cable outlet somebody's just you're
like there for the
whole day it became such a cult film yeah yeah very interesting yeah very
unexpected yeah and uh
uh and and and the baker uh boys uh did you like doing that i mean i loved
doing that movie baker
brothers baker boys boys yeah i was gonna just let let it go yeah but um yeah i
loved making that movie
and um i had actually read that script maybe five years prior to doing it is
that right yeah and um you
know um like many young filmmakers you know steve had a hard time getting it
made and um but i always
love i mean that's a you know very kind of almost a once in a lifetime part it's
a lot of fun yeah
yeah you ever get your boys are great you ever get yourself in a in a situation
it happens with me
on a regular basis here where uh you you know there's something going on but
you just kind of
put it in the back of your mind and then you sort of pretend to forget about it
and then all of a
sudden oh god it's this you know you know what i'm talking about like in a
script or something
you love denial yeah yeah yeah yeah does that ever happen like when you you
love something
and you think okay but it's got this one thing but i worry about it till yeah
um actually that happens
to me a lot um i have amazing powers of denial um when when i really really
want to do something but
there's something really really scary in it and you know you read it and but it
just doesn't quite
penetrate and um um the the piano scene was actually one of those moments in in
the scene
but it's it's a kind of a do or die scene and um and i didn't really think
about it until
the day came to shoot it and i thought i have to stand and sing on top of a
piano in a red dress
i could look really foolish doing this um but fortunately um steve just was you
know just said
trust me yeah steve had nothing to do with it no you just looked great but it
could well thank you dave
but uh it could have been real cornball too in the wrong hands no i understand
sure yeah
we have uh some videotape here and we can show it or we you're married to that
tv guy yeah that that guy
yeah david kelly he likes every program on television is david kelly does that
after a
while get on your nerves oh i'm mr tv look at me i'm mr tv well it seems to
irritate you a bit
well yeah good um no i know actually you know he he doesn't write all the time
actually we do see him yeah and do you uh do you ever think well i'd like to be
put me in are you
ever are you ever on those shows you've been on those oh i snuck in one you sneaked
on a show i
yeah i sneaked on a show i um it was uh picket fences which i miss very much
and used to be right
here at cvs friday nights picket fences yeah and um you know he's a real
practical joker my husband
and he had played a big practical joke on somebody in the office and the
producer leaned over and he
said you want to get him back and i mean there was no reason for me to get him
back but i think it's
a juice you want to do you want to get him right um because he's hard to get
and so anyway he said
we'll sneak you in the show and not tell him and a long time went by and then
he wrote this episode
about you know it's kind of twisted um the show was enigmatic as it was yeah
yeah and this one and
you know it is kind of a you know funny sense of humor and um it was about a
masseuse who was murdered
and it was um and in in doing the investigation of the murder they discovered
that he was performing
um a procedure a little extra called the squiggle on some of his clients and so
they were interviewing
all of his female clients and i was one of them and you were when i got the squiggle
and your husband
your husband didn't know anything about it until he sees the show well then
months go by and i had
actually forgotten about it and i was back in my bedroom breastfeeding my child
and um
i can i can see that i have to watch myself no i just i don't i apologize you
know it's a lovely image
i just didn't know if we were perfectly natural and fine i just didn't you know
see this is why
this is why i shouldn't do these shows no no you can no no you're fine so um
anyway he came back and
said is there something you'd like to tell me there's really no punch line to
the story other
than we did get him that's a great story it doesn't get any better
let's let's knock through some of these and you just say anything you want
about them uh
batman returns and and for my money that was the best batman right there
michael keaton was batman i thought he was great i thought you were great was
that fun you guys were
it was really fun it was hard work um just the physicality of it all the suit
was
impossible but it was really really fun and it was really uh you know i think
just such a joy to
be in a tim burton movie because i'm such a big fan of his the age of innocence
that's a lovely piece
of work wasn't it that was fun too dude where's my car oh wait a minute
oh no that's that's my bill from blockbuster i'm sorry i don't know
let's uh let do you mind you can we show this tape or not do you mind if we
show the tape oh is this
if i am sam no no we'll get to that this is this is the miss the california
pageant 1978.
what do you think i'm game okay you remember how old you're just a kid 1978
obviously and were you miss
california sort of yeah no not sort of you either are or you're very confusing
pageant you can't
pretend you're somebody well i don't even remember all right perhaps the videotape
will provide us with a
clue here we go miss california page of 1970. you're awesome oil paints you'd
like to become an actress
mexican food is her favorite and her measurements are 33 24 34. wow
yes you were miss california uh now let's talk about the movie i am sam i am
sam sam this is a sean penn
is also yes um it's a story of a mentally challenged single parent um fighting
for custody uh for his
soon-to-be eight-year-old daughter and um um he he and his friends realize that
he needs a lawyer so they
go through the yellow pages and they find the biggest ad and they decide that
must be the best
agency and so he uh he comes to visit me and i tell him that um i i i he can't
really be bothered
with him he can't afford me in any way and then um i lie to my colleagues and
tell them that i indeed
am taking him on pro bono when indeed i'm lying and he then shows up uh to the
office to ask me if
if i have the referral that i had promised him okay so this is a a first
meeting or a second
meeting it's a second meeting okay you and sean penn me and sean penn that's
right okay yeah
i am sam i am sam take a look
it's very sweet very sweet and it when can we see that it opens uh december 28th
december 28th sam i am
sam i am i am sam well god it's a pleasure to have you here and i hope you come
back in another 12 years
or something michelle pfeiffer everybody we'll be right back with dennis regan

Michelle Pfeiffer Reveals Her Beauty Queen Past | Letterman

our first guest is an academy award nominated actress who stars in a new film
entitled i am sam and opens december 28th here's the lovely michelle pfeiffer
wow nice to see you
well this is great
that's lovely that's very nice i want to say something here and i don't want to
be stupid about this and
forgive me if it seems untoward or clumsy but but i you know i've seen you in
in films and
and i've seen you on uh other shows and stuff and uh but i've never seen you
like like here and and oh
my god
you know what i mean
you just look fantastic oh well thank you and thank you for being on the show
can i get you anything
no i'm fine yeah well it's nice to have you here for heaven's sake maybe a
heater yeah we keep a little
we like to keep a little chilly are you guys freezing yeah you should you
should tell your
guests to dress in layers
now let's uh let's talk a little bit about things okay to try to break some ice
here um
you know we've wanted you to be on the show and after i saw in 88 the fabulous
baker brothers i just
thought oh oh my god can you get any better than this and that that's when i
really got excited about
well let's see and of course so we couldn't and now here here you are like 20
years later
uh and and and and i'm always interested because we don't want to repeat
mistakes we may have made
in the past was there a reason that we were unable to make this booking
straight away well
do you do you remember i was booked on the show and i and i didn't show up that's
right i do remember
that's like a year ago or something oh no no it was it was what was a while ago
um and and um i
thought you might be a little upset with me so it's taking me this long to get
my courage to oh well
you know that's very sweet but yeah i'm never i'm never serious about what what
did i say oh
i i don't know actually so you you thought you had irritated me i thought
perhaps i had irritated
you no no no i'm accustomed to women like you standing me up
let's talk about uh oh did you have a nice thanksgiving i did i had actually
had a fabulous
thanksgiving what did you do um i had my whole family came over and we we had
we had so
much food and um everybody got along and everybody nobody was fighting nobody
was feuding and uh it
was really lovely that sounds nice yeah good for you and normally are there
fights and feuds yeah
yeah yeah yeah but you know is i mean that's the the dynamic that i think makes
families
interesting don't you that they they have a very interesting family yeah yeah
um
tell me about what you did before you became a an actress in films i uh well i
had many jobs and uh
where were you born i was born in orange county and the last job i had the job
that i had uh while
i was pursuing acting was uh i worked at a supermarket i i worked in the
supermarket as well is that right
how old were you when you started the market um i was about uh 19 i think when
i started working at
the supermarket yeah and what did you do well they started me bagging i started
bagging yeah and then
i was a bad girl as well worked your way up worked my way up to i eventually
did uh it was in produce
yeah yeah i got that i never made it to produce and everything yeah yeah but it's
it's a good
experience isn't it yeah um but didn't weren't you a stock clerk at one point
yeah i stocked the shelves
and everything so so could you uh could you tie the stem of a maraschino cherry
with your tongue
you know that that wasn't required when i really no that never came up really
really you can do that
i thought all stock clerks not me no no siree the ones at vons did
at what point when you were working in the supermarket did you think oh maybe i
could be an
actress did you always think you could be an actress well my mother did given
my my dramatics as a child
but um it may have been her comments that drove me to it but um no i um i i had
always wanted to
when i and but it was uh so far from any kind of reality um where i grew up i
didn't know any actors
i didn't come from any kind of artistic background really per se and um uh i
was checking groceries one
day and um there was a woman who was arguing with me about the prices of her
cantaloupes and um
i know that woman yeah but i don't suppose she lived in leisure world no no no
no okay um different woman um so and i that was a turning point for me
had you had you had you done any acting like in high school i did um it was one
of the few classes i
actually attended yeah and um and i loved it um yeah what was the first thing
you were able to do then
professionally after you left the supermarket um well i think my well my first
acting job was one line on
fantasy island oh fantasy island yeah that used to be the thing with the plane
and the guy yeah it was
great yeah because you know what it was it was it was it was the guy paul the
guy how to no no the guy
yeah that's right yeah welcome to fantasy island and what was your line do you
recall who is he naomi
and there you go that's all you need to know you know what else is that star
face man that was an
entertaining movie yeah it's one of those where anytime you like one oh oh boy
whenever you see
like a glimpse of it when they run it on a cable outlet somebody's just you're
like there for the
whole day it became such a cult film yeah yeah very interesting yeah very
unexpected yeah and uh
uh and and and the baker uh boys uh did you like doing that i mean i loved
doing that movie baker
brothers baker boys boys yeah i was gonna just let let it go yeah but um yeah i
loved making that movie
and um i had actually read that script maybe five years prior to doing it is
that right yeah and um you
know um like many young filmmakers you know steve had a hard time getting it
made and um but i always
love i mean that's a you know very kind of almost a once in a lifetime part it's
a lot of fun yeah
yeah you ever get your boys are great you ever get yourself in a in a situation
it happens with me
on a regular basis here where uh you you know there's something going on but
you just kind of
put it in the back of your mind and then you sort of pretend to forget about it
and then all of a
sudden oh god it's this you know you know what i'm talking about like in a
script or something
you love denial yeah yeah yeah yeah does that ever happen like when you you
love something
and you think okay but it's got this one thing but i worry about it till yeah
um actually that happens
to me a lot um i have amazing powers of denial um when when i really really
want to do something but
there's something really really scary in it and you know you read it and but it
just doesn't quite
penetrate and um um the the piano scene was actually one of those moments in in
the scene
but it's it's a kind of a do or die scene and um and i didn't really think
about it until
the day came to shoot it and i thought i have to stand and sing on top of a
piano in a red dress
i could look really foolish doing this um but fortunately um steve just was you
know just said
trust me yeah steve had nothing to do with it no you just looked great but it
could well thank you dave
but uh it could have been real cornball too in the wrong hands no i understand
sure yeah
we have uh some videotape here and we can show it or we you're married to that
tv guy yeah that that guy
yeah david kelly he likes every program on television is david kelly does that
after a
while get on your nerves oh i'm mr tv look at me i'm mr tv well it seems to
irritate you a bit
well yeah good um no i know actually you know he he doesn't write all the time
actually we do see him yeah and do you uh do you ever think well i'd like to be
put me in are you
ever are you ever on those shows you've been on those oh i snuck in one you sneaked
on a show i
yeah i sneaked on a show i um it was uh picket fences which i miss very much
and used to be right
here at cvs friday nights picket fences yeah and um you know he's a real
practical joker my husband
and he had played a big practical joke on somebody in the office and the
producer leaned over and he
said you want to get him back and i mean there was no reason for me to get him
back but i think it's
a juice you want to do you want to get him right um because he's hard to get
and so anyway he said
we'll sneak you in the show and not tell him and a long time went by and then
he wrote this episode
about you know it's kind of twisted um the show was enigmatic as it was yeah
yeah and this one and
you know it is kind of a you know funny sense of humor and um it was about a
masseuse who was murdered
and it was um and in in doing the investigation of the murder they discovered
that he was performing
um a procedure a little extra called the squiggle on some of his clients and so
they were interviewing
all of his female clients and i was one of them and you were when i got the squiggle
and your husband
your husband didn't know anything about it until he sees the show well then
months go by and i had
actually forgotten about it and i was back in my bedroom breastfeeding my child
and um
i can i can see that i have to watch myself no i just i don't i apologize you
know it's a lovely image
i just didn't know if we were perfectly natural and fine i just didn't you know
see this is why
this is why i shouldn't do these shows no no you can no no you're fine so um
anyway he came back and
said is there something you'd like to tell me there's really no punch line to
the story other
than we did get him that's a great story it doesn't get any better
let's let's knock through some of these and you just say anything you want
about them uh
batman returns and and for my money that was the best batman right there
michael keaton was batman i thought he was great i thought you were great was
that fun you guys were
it was really fun it was hard work um just the physicality of it all the suit
was
impossible but it was really really fun and it was really uh you know i think
just such a joy to
be in a tim burton movie because i'm such a big fan of his the age of innocence
that's a lovely piece
of work wasn't it that was fun too dude where's my car oh wait a minute
oh no that's that's my bill from blockbuster i'm sorry i don't know
let's uh let do you mind you can we show this tape or not do you mind if we
show the tape oh is this
if i am sam no no we'll get to that this is this is the miss the california
pageant 1978.
what do you think i'm game okay you remember how old you're just a kid 1978
obviously and were you miss
california sort of yeah no not sort of you either are or you're very confusing
pageant you can't
pretend you're somebody well i don't even remember all right perhaps the videotape
will provide us with a
clue here we go miss california page of 1970. you're awesome oil paints you'd
like to become an actress
mexican food is her favorite and her measurements are 33 24 34. wow
yes you were miss california uh now let's talk about the movie i am sam i am
sam sam this is a sean penn
is also yes um it's a story of a mentally challenged single parent um fighting
for custody uh for his
soon-to-be eight-year-old daughter and um um he he and his friends realize that
he needs a lawyer so they
go through the yellow pages and they find the biggest ad and they decide that
must be the best
agency and so he uh he comes to visit me and i tell him that um i i i he can't
really be bothered
with him he can't afford me in any way and then um i lie to my colleagues and
tell them that i indeed
am taking him on pro bono when indeed i'm lying and he then shows up uh to the
office to ask me if
if i have the referral that i had promised him okay so this is a a first
meeting or a second
meeting it's a second meeting okay you and sean penn me and sean penn that's
right okay yeah
i am sam i am sam take a look
it's very sweet very sweet and it when can we see that it opens uh december 28th
december 28th sam i am
sam i am i am sam well god it's a pleasure to have you here and i hope you come
back in another 12 years
or somet