Name: Top Ten Sneezes | Letterman
Uploaded: 2024-04-02T15:00:43.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Top Ten Sneezes | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-04-02. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Top Ten Sneezes | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-04-02. Transcript available.

the category tonight uh top 10 sneezes now you know why we're doing this and
this is uh an area
kind of a sore spot a bit of a controversy with me uh it's a allergy season now
listen to what i
have to say on this one uh meteorologists are reporting record high pollen
counts this year
do you anybody over there have the allergies allergies allergies anybody yeah
yeah a lot
of people anybody in the audience have the allergies i uh i myself am not
allergic to anything i mean
honestly got nothing absolutely nothing therefore i think one of two things it's
uh non-existent
or uh allergies are a sign of weakness thank you
you see what i do there uh i reach out and i find something that puts me in a
in a
false position of superiority hell i don't have allergies yes you just must be
weak
that's how i roll yeah you wow uh meteorologists are reporting a record high
pollen counts now you
know when i hear this you know what i do that's that false it has no effect on
me all sense of
superiority although sometimes if you leave your car parked out under a pollen
tree in the morning
you'll see the pollen that's the only effect that it has i hate that that's all
you have to worry about
there the car falling on your roof now uh the category is top 10 sneezes a
sneeze that protects
your body by clearing the nose of bacteria and viruses yeah maybe maybe not i
don't know
i i do know this that uh whether you do it once whether you do it uh six times
in a row each time
you yank a hair out of your nose you will you will sneeze you have learned that
it's always you
will all it will always it's as automatic as the sun coming up that is a truism
of life that you have
learned that's right okay a single sneeze can uh send 100 000 germs into the
air wow a sneeze travels
about 100 miles an hour i've done that on the hutch no yeah rush hour forget it
sneezed i've sneezed on the
hutch yeah all right here we go top 10 sneezes number 10 it's a monkey
thank you hey what about a gesundheit number nine and natalie portman i think
you know something this
i really like this movie and i didn't uh number eight uh news anchorman all
right
number seven a scandinavian and news anchorman
anchor anchor anchor woman anchor woman number six green days billy joe armstrong
number five first sneeze ever captured on film
number four me me dave
number three president obama it should be the banks taking oh look out
i was cutting that off for a while number two twins
and the number one sneeze it's a baby panda here we go
*crowd laughs*