Name: Chris Elliott's Late Night Talk Show | Letterman
Uploaded: 2024-04-09T15:00:20.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Chris Elliott's Late Night Talk Show | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-04-09. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Chris Elliott's Late Night Talk Show | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-04-09. Transcript available.

From the set of Late Night with David Letterman, welcome to a very special
edition of Night Light
starring Chris Elliott. Chris's topic for discussion tonight is both
controversial and
volatile. Parental discretion is therefore advised. And now, as if that weren't
enough,
and by gosh, don't you think it ought to be? Here I come.
Oh, my. Ah. Well, welcome to another edition of Night Light. Thank you very
much. And as
always, I like to start off the show by acknowledging my beautiful studio
audience. Here they are
right over here. You know, I've always said it and I'll always say it. We get
the best
looking studio audiences right here in North America on Night Light. Well, my
name is Chris
Elliott and I'll be your host for the next three minutes or so. And you know,
Night Light has
been off the air for a while. We've been on a hiatus. And I'll tell you why.
Because frankly,
I was a little upset at a lot of reviews that came out that called Night Light
a cheap rip
off of Late Night with David Letterman, which I don't think is really fair. But
I'm back
now and I'm ready to do the show. And I've sort of changed the format a little
bit. And
we'll get to that in a minute. But first, let's do our top three list. Okay.
Here we are from the home office in Caliente, Nevada. Caliente, Nevada, Paul.
Caliente, Nevada.
Here we go. Tonight's topic is top three iron-bearing ores or silly nicknames.
Top three iron-bearing
ores or silly nicknames from Caliente, Nevada. Number three. Hematite.
Number two. Magnetite. Ladies and gentlemen, I am very near calling this whole
thing off.
Should I call it off? Should I call it off? The number one iron-bearing ores or
silly nickname,
Pudgy.
It'll work. Okay. Well, let's get right to the business at hand tonight.
Tonight's topic
of discussion is thermonuclear war and the proliferation of nuclear weapons and
what that
means to our generation. But more importantly, what that means to future
generations, to our
children, will they wake up to a paradise or really a vast wasteland? And
joining us from
his studios in New York City is a figure from another sort of vast wasteland,
the king of
late night himself, David Letterman. David? David, are you there?
Yeah, I'm right here, Chris.
Well, uh...
Terry Garr is here also. I can't see her. Terry's right here. Oh, there she is.
Hi, Terry.
Hi, Chris. Hi. Gee, you smell terrific. Thank you.
Well, Dave, thank you very much for taking time out of your busy schedule to
join us here on
Nightlight.
Thank you for having me.
Well, that's fine. Now, how are things in New York City?
Great. Couldn't be better.
Now, I had a weather report. I hear it's kind of cool there.
Actually, it is. It's a little nippy.
I'm sorry, Dave. I'm getting breakup. What, uh...
Did you just... Did you just go yippee?
What is that supposed to mean?
I said it's nippy.
Oh, there it is.
Nippy.
Okay. All right. We got it back. There you go.
Yeah, because I, uh... I couldn't understand why you would go yippee.
Yeah, no, I didn't. Well, I didn't. I said it was...
That would be really stupid.
Yeah.
Okay, well, Dave, the topic of discussion tonight is nuclear war.
Now, uh, you claim to preside over a show that seems to have the pulse on what's
going on in the nation today.
What do you feel about nuclear Armageddon?
Well, you know, you know, Chris, I certainly have very deep thoughts regarding
that,
but I try to do a little lighthearted show here, and I'd prefer to keep my
political views to myself.
What do you think about it?
Well, you know, I do kind of a lighthearted show here myself, and, uh...
And actually, I haven't really had time to weigh both sides of the issue, so I...
I really couldn't say anything about it either.
Uh-huh. Yeah.
You know, you know, Chris, I mean, the hair looks great, the set looks great,
and the satellite feed is working perfectly.
They got all the kinks worked out of it.
Yeah, but, you know, I think maybe the format is wrong for you.
Why don't you just go back to ripping off the R show, you know, like you used
to do...
Well, you know, you're breaking up again, and, uh, boy, I guess that means that
that's all the time we have for Nightlight tonight.
It is a short show.
I just want to thank David Letterman and...
No, I'm sorry.
I keep chuckling because I keep thinking of him going, yippee.
That was really weird.
What a stupid thing to do.
Anyway, join us next week when my guests will be Ishtar star Jack Weston,
and we'll be broadcasting from beautiful Gloucester, Massachusetts.
Thank you, everybody.
Good night.
Good night.