Name: NSFW: May We See Your Photos Please? | Letterman
Uploaded: 2024-05-01T15:00:32.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'NSFW: May We See Your Photos Please? | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-05-01. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'NSFW: May We See Your Photos Please? | Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-05-01. Transcript available.

hey ladies and gentlemen guess what you came on a great night tonight is may we
see your photos
please there you go oh all right pete do me a favor turn on the external camera
will you
pete fadovich our director tonight hal gurney legendary race driver and
director hal gurney is
not with us tonight this is uh new york city new york new york the town's so
nice they named it
twice and this is central park we're looking toward central park and this is
sixth avenue or avenue of
the americas it's a beautiful day here in manhattan i would like some current
meteorological data please
pete do we have meteorological data pete we'll get it pete come on let's
because it's truly a beautiful
day isn't it yeah humidity is down uh temperature is not so muggy hot all right
look look uh look to
your right across sixth avenue okay now let's get in on that apartment building
let's just see what's
going on is the supermarket okay let's okay may we join you for tea perhaps a
seance all right let's go
one up okay let's keep going till we find something looks like it may be a vacancy
paul you want to take
a look at that get yourself a studio in town close to work okay all right
nobody home
no nobody there either all right let's go back over to the may we see your
photos please headquarters
and it takes place as it always does right there at fromax
and this is the photo center and international chemical cheese corporation from
headquartered in
france and we're going to go in there and i think today we'll be looking at
summertime vacation photos oh there's kind of a line here excuse me sir
hi sir pardon me sir oh look hi how do you do nice to see it can't interrupt
you i know i know you're
making change for a five you're very busy uh okay all right let's keep going he's
busy hi how are you
ma'am hi my name is dave letterman i do a little tv show here what is your name
please uh joan hi joan
my name is tracy i didn't hear a word either of them said joan and tracy joan
and tracy and are you
guys picking up uh vacation photos yes all right may we see your summertime
vacation photos please
here we go joan and tracy did you vacation together this is my vacation in israel
no that's
my mother i left her at home oh no wait we didn't see the first photo oh sorry
this is getting off of
the airplane uh-huh so that was taken where at the airport right exactly and
this is of my camel on
our camel ride through the desert and uh he looks like he's dead what what did
you maybe a little too
much luggage for the camel i think all right this was even before i got on him
yeah okay that's that's
my friend shelly shelly shelly was on the trip as well so we had tracy joan and
shelly i wasn't she
wasn't there oh sheila shelly i can't hear anything tell them to turn off that
machine
okay that's your friend whoever and then who are these guys oh here's where the
trouble begins right
here these are these are my friends fred and greg they're on the trip too uh-huh
i didn't know that
this is um visiting some some this is sherry we're learning a little something
about ourselves
oh there's the children at the at the kibbutz he told me about yeah that's that's
wait a minute and who is that that's my friend shelly again uh-huh
uh-huh well now why is she okay and then who do we have here that's us planting
a tree in israel
good for you when did you guys get back um we got back in july 18th all right
did you have a lovely
trip yeah it was great well thank you for showing us your photos thank you okay
all right now we have
to move on get out of the way all right all right well let's go back and take a
look at some more
photos here hi are you picking up photos yeah just pick some up uh-huh yeah are
these uh summertime
vacation photos these are summertime south of the border in north carolina
about a month ago all right
what is your name my name is chris all right chris let's take a look at your
vacation photos what do
you do for a living chris pardon me i say what do you do for a living i'm a
commercial artist uh-huh
okay all right this is in south of the border this is my friend nancy uh-huh
and this is pedro here
all right this is me getting attacked by a giant uh eagle right all right this
is me
i know i know i know i know you're hoping you're hoping we all think it's a
joke
hey i tell you you're making us sick put that down hey just put the photo down
we don't want that on may
we see your photos please this is good this is me with a mexican hat okay you're
done all right
i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry you have to see that i'm sorry i'm very sorry
i said well god
oh man what is wrong with america what has happened to the moral fiber of this
country
ladies and gentlemen i give you my sal solemn word you will never see may we
see your photos again
oh boy oh oh you baby boy you hate to see something like that happen may we see
your photos please it was
originally designed for the kids that's how that segment began and that look
look what's become of it
shocking there are no heroes in this country anymore and who can we blame i'll
tell you we can blame
the media that's who we can blame
let's see uh pen and teller are here ladies and gentlemen and uh aaron neville
and john
torturo from the film barton fink i gotta go see me that film i'd like to go
see that
you gotta see yourself that film uh pete turn on that what do you want what do
you have here oh telegrams
uh oh the top 10 list are we doing that now okay well pete turn on the camera
and let's take a look
there at the uh fromx place again let's go right back in there you know that
guy was going to be
trouble by the way he was kind of he was a little too eager to show us his
photos and what about the
shirt he was wearing he fit some sort of profile some kind of deadbeat photo
lab profile hi how are
you nice to see you anybody picking up vacation photos are you picking up
vacation photos yeah oh what is
your name sir um frank uh-huh yeah well my name is uh regis
yeah that's fair enough all right are you sure we have a second here do you do
you have a vacation
photo you'd like to share with us just one or two uh yeah well i just got back
from my honeymoon uh-oh
this should be a good one right where'd you go to on your honeymoon uh where
did i go yes where did
you go sorry i can't hear i went to bermuda oh i'm sorry you know bermuda is a
beautiful place to
a honeymoon or vacation yes it is yeah all right let's all right here's here's
one of me all right
is that taken by your bride yes would you like to see her well yes sure all
right come over here i'd
love to see her she's beautiful oh she's right there yeah oh hi how are you
nice to see you what
what is your name valerie valerie did you have a nice time in bermuda i had an
excellent time all
right we're gonna look at a couple more of your vacation photos your honeymoon
photos all right here's
here's a picture of my bride uh-huh okay all right you have anything taken back
in the room uh um um
no okay we have to go nice to see you enjoy your lives together
what is your name sir uh ray
we just got married yeah he just got married that's right sometimes you change
your name
change it from ed to ray and it just had slipped his mind pete are you still in
there
let's turn on the external camera pete
we're going back to play may we see your photos please we'll try it one more
time
get it right this man has just held up the place goodbye sir wait a minute let's
see the uh the young
woman there in the kind of uh chiffon colored uh whatever that thing is hi how
are you hi my name is
dave what is your name ma'am karen karen where are you from i'm from new york
uh-huh what part of
new york right manhattan oh that's good what do you do for a living i work in a
financial investment
company i see and and are you making a a lot of money not that much have you
been hurt by the
recession no don't you think it's reaganomics is the problem you're a little
late yeah and uh uh do
you have photos there you're picking up yeah i do all right would you like to
see you say play may
we see your photos please sure all right let's see the photos what are they uh
reprints of my uh
family now wait a minute these are reprints my nephew ryan hello brian how old
a boy is brian ryan
he's uh one and a half he's a little over one uh-huh looks like a fine young
man he is very cute
all right this is my niece allison she's two allison a lovely young girl it's
my nephew
you don't you don't happen to know a guy in a funny looking shirt
she's yeah she looked like she had some kind of waterfowl there on her hair
that's
that's my nephew it's a boy that's cute all right now what do we got here babes
me on the beach hey no hey let's see come on please let's see okay who is this
that's me and
a girlfriend christine all right well no wait a minute wait a minute just a
moment where was that
taken that was in the hamptons uh-huh and were you out there this summer yes
did you have a nice
time quit quit thumping that thing around hold hold it we just have to make a
positive identification
all right very nice lovely young ladies and more kids and hey what's that that's
that's uh
my nephew's birthday party uh-huh and and who's the little kid right there next
to that giant thing
that's my nephew and that's my sister oh so this is much much older a photo of
him right no
actually he just it's a that one he looks very old the first one yeah because
there he
looks like a like a brand new baby or something really am i talking about the
same kid yeah that's
him well now what what was the one we started with the kids standing there in
the shirt and stuff
that was him about a month later oh see well very perceptive on my part
it takes me a while to take get my camera finished huh we're done all right
thank you very
much for playing may we see your photos please nice to see you