Name: Blake Lively Did Time In Disneyland Jail | David Letterman
Uploaded: 2024-08-26T14:53:49.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Blake Lively Did Time In Disneyland Jail | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-08-26. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Blake Lively Did Time In Disneyland Jail | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-08-26. Transcript available.

welcome back to the show thank you so much well you look you look great well
thank you um uh julia
roberts called me this weekend and she wanted to know if we could take you away
to a polygamous
community and marry you but i heard that um that somebody snatched you up so
the the offer's open
okay yeah no i'll tell you something off the record we're not getting along
and uh let's talk of illegal separation i heard there's a mix-up i'll be
outside on the curb
uh nice to see you and uh uh boy you look uh spring-like boy those are
beautiful uh earrings
thank you thank you so much so spring becomes you oh well thank you i'm i'm
just excited because
we're gonna go on break in a week um we've been working for almost a year
straight oh my a year
straight really because of the writer's strike we had five weeks off last year
and then we've
been working straight through ouch um so we get to go on a break next wednesday
i can't wait and
what are you gonna do i'm gonna go to disneyland
i'm really excited i i grew up going to disneyland like like uh twice a week
except for their twice a week yeah my mom would take me out of school and take
me to disneyland for a
regular fixture but i i was banned from disneyland for a year because i went to
disney prison what
were you counting cards um no um there's a way to get it i was really young so
i wasn't responsible
for this this is all my brother's fault but um we uh if you if you get a stamp
when you leave the park
sure if you um spray hairspray on it you can transfer it onto someone else's
hand so in the parking lot
he went up to somebody and said hey can we spray hairspray on your hand and we
transferred it
and then we go in through through the turnstall and there's these people that
are called like fox
fighters or some weird name and they're dressed up like normal people um and
they they say excuse
me can you come with us and they take us aside and i'm like six years old and
my brother says no
matter what they say do not confess i will not admit that we did this so he was
like a professional
felon as well and we go downstairs of disneyland it's all white rooms everybody's
dressed in all
white the furniture is all white um and they just interrogate us everything's
miniature size
like mike tv yeah it was crazy and it was really scary and traumatizing um and
they're interrogating
a 12 and a six year old did they get out the rubber hose but what was i mean
for god's sakes i mean what
did they hope to accomplish by that they wanted us to admit that that we were
trying to get in for
free and then ban us for life but we we were strong and we we said that we didn't
do it but they had us
on on tape um well they said they had us on tape from the parking lot um so it
was pretty sad so now
um it's interesting because they they spend billions and billions of dollars uh
building
a wonderland for kids and then they're stunned and surprised that kids would
want to sneak in
it's true it's true that's not right
do you do you live you don't live in new york city i do i do live in the city
we shoot here
you shoot the show the show is here yeah yeah and you have uh like a nice big
place i i have
i have a beautiful apartment um it's you know it's by the water so it's really
nice oh cool and i have
my puppy and i get to take her for a walk what kind of puppy do you have um she's
a tiny teacup malty
poo say that again a tiny teacup what malty poo she's like a glorified mouse ah
yeah she uh she's
she's pretty precious though so it's no it's a diminutive animal i'm getting
how big is the
animal she's um she's about two pounds tiny teacup multi-poo is what yeah you
know but i i always
love big dogs my whole life um but you know i travel so much that then i need a
travel size dog
it's like it's true it's like the shampoo in the island duane reid travel size
but a two two pound
dog two pound dog yeah that's not a dog that's luncheon meat like a pound of bologna
and a pound
of work that's crazy no but uh yeah did you add the poo part no she's a maltese
and a poodle mix oh
maltese and a poodle but she's not she's not like a real dog you know i'll take
her on planes and um
one time i had a woman um in first class was complaining apparently and the the
flight was held
up we couldn't take off and nobody could figure out why we're sitting on the
tarmac for like 15 minutes
and she said um ma'am is that because she heard my dog bark and she goes do you
have a duck in there
a duck you have a duck in there and i said well what are you because her bark
her bark is like
a you have a duck in there yeah i think a lot of us have ducks on this one
what does the bark sound like her bark is like it's like what no that wasn't it
was like um it's
more like it's a it's like a quack it's like i don't know it's it's i'm not
doing a good penny bark
but um they thought there was a duck and this woman on first class said i'm not
gonna fly in this plane
you guys have to find the duck they thought a duck had flown into the plane and
it was all because
this little teacup malty boot looks like teddy bear i'm not i'm not flying
because there's a duck
oh my god yeah well i'm with her by god now look at this this is a rolling
stone magazine this is
the new pocket-sized rolling stone oh and uh there you are on the cover oh
buddy just enjoying a snack
dave you know it's uh the recession is is affecting everyone they couldn't even
afford
two ice cream of course that's right that's too bad all we got is one ice cream
cone girls and we
couldn't even have napkins
well let's see um the uh show a gossip girl monday nights on cw it has things
how are things at the cw is
is it all right i i think they're great i mean our show's doing well and uh you
know we're good
excited for a new season enjoy your vacation thank you thank you very much blake
lively ladies and we're
good to see you