Name: Fan Request: Trump Or Monkey? | David Letterman
Uploaded: 2024-10-11T15:00:47.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Fan Request: Trump Or Monkey? | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-10-11. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Fan Request: Trump Or Monkey? | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-10-11. Transcript available.

what a show uh we have for uh you folks by the way i'm doing this now oh and
what and that what
is that well yeah you tell me i saw a guy do this in a movie i don't even know
who it was a couple
of years ago and i liked it so well and i'm just i just remembered it and i'm
just getting around
to doing it so it's like from my from my eyes to your no no so i'm watching oh
i'm watching you oh
you're watching me it's kind of a menacing thing oh well you know let me say
this to you okay it
doesn't work that way if you're being watched you can't watch me but what i
wanted to know is is
this still a hip kind of thing to do or am i really too late on this first time
i've seen it i'm really
first time you've seen to me it's fresh we were we were going to go into rupert's
tonight to play trump
or monkey and i forgot to go in there rupert are you over there you haven't
closed up and gone home
yet have you let's go into the hello deli look at that snow coming down how do
you do folks nice to
see you i'm sorry you couldn't get in to see the program come back again
another time you losers now
hey rupert how are you good dave tonight we're going to be playing trump or
monkey uh-huh all
right so do me a favor run out there and i'm getting contestants for trump or
monkey okay okay
i'll check back with you in a minute all right uh-huh be playing trump or
monkey there goes rupert
all right thank you very much we'll check back in and i'll be playing the very
popular trump or monkey
i enjoy this and now ladies and gentlemen it's time for a segment of the
program we call george w bush
pretends to be interested
and we start selling polyethylene pipe at that time i didn't know that polyethylene
pipe would be the
company today isco industries today it is is focused on selling servicing
manufacturing parts for
polyethylene pipe and selling equipment that and renting equipment that puts
the pipe together
oh my god i could go on for hours about polyethylene pipe my goodness all right
let's go back out and
see if rupert's got a contestant for trump or monkey hey rupert how you doing
good i see you have a
contestant there who are we talking with this is jessica schmidt okay how do
you say the last name
schmidt yeah jessica nice to see you nice to see you where are you from lincoln
nebraska lincoln nebraska
holy cow what brings you to new york city christmas present first time in new york
oh really are you
having a nice time awesome uh-huh what do you do for a living there in lincoln
you go to school yes
i'm a freshman at university of nebraska yeah what are you studying advertising
uh those the corn huskers
oh yeah yeah yeah how's the football program it's good yeah is it good now or
is it not good it seems
like sometimes it's really good sometimes it's and you're always on probation
are you on probation now
no all right uh so what are you studying there jessica advertising uh-huh and
when you get out
of college what are you going to do i want to work for a fashion magazine oh
really yeah me too
hey jessica you can't see me now you can't see what i'm doing can you i cannot
take your two fingers
on your right hand fingers on your right hand yeah and point them at your eyes
yeah like that
now take your index finger on your right hand and point it at rupert yeah keep
doing that keep
doing that in a menacing fashion
try it again but with some menace to it like some like you're like he's in
trouble try it again
no no go to the eyes first you got to go to the eyes then to rupert
yeah that's right and then to rupert yeah
that's good okay all right jessica what uh what else have you done since you've
been in new york
city i've been to a couple of broadway plays what have you seen uh moving out
did you like that i
loved it the dancing and that's the billy joel musical thing yeah it was
awesome music uh-huh what
else did you see uh well tomorrow we're seeing hairspray and the boy from oz oh
yeah have you seen
lady without a hat pin no it's a it's a very hot hot ticket yeah i agree uh now
jessica would tonight
tonight we're playing uh monkey or trump you know how we play oh no trumpy or
monk what trump or your
monkey or monkey trumpy or monkey okay trumpy or monkey all right bring up the
bring up the thing
rupert and all you have to do is identify which one of those three pictures is
donald trump
and uh you win what what are we playing for tonight alan dave it's a brand new
speed bone
oh that'd be good back to you dave have a lot of fun with that in lincoln nebraska
uh okay jessica now uh all you have to do is select uh donald trump and you win
are you ready
i'm ready all right here we go paul a little music all right anytime you're
ready jessica
we're looking for donald trump we're playing trump or monkey monkey or trump
trumpy or monk we're looking
for donald trump and she has now okay now you think that that is what donald
trump you think that that
is donald trump yeah all right turn it over take a look here we go i'm sorry jessica
it's so much fun to play trump or monkey turn over the center one uh rupert
okay that's also a
and finally here's mr trump there we go there's donald trump right there well jessica
it was nice
meeting you thank you for playing trump or monkey but you know there are no
losers on trump or monkey
what do we have for her girls oh my god this ought to be shut down