Name: Dave New Year's Pledge To America | David Letterman
Uploaded: 2025-01-01T16:00:42.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Dave New Year's Pledge To America | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-01-01. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Dave New Year's Pledge To America | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-01-01. Transcript available.

- Now, kids, for our first show of 1990,
say hello to our good friend, Paul Shaver.
He's right over there.
- All right, all right.
- Boys?
- Thank you very much.
- Did you get that mopped up?
- Thank you, David, Happy New Year to you.
- Yeah, Happy New Year to you, by the way.
- Thank you very much.
- Thank you for everything.
- If you remember, before the New Year,
our last show or the previous year,
you said maybe in the New Year, uniforms for the band.
- Exactly.
We tried a little something today.
- Yeah.
- We dressed as you.
We felt we could call ourselves a letterman.
- And what do you think?
- I don't know.
- Do you like these?
- Would we ever wear?
Well, it puts you in the mind to do something.
We worked out a little something.
Watch this, ready?
Watch this.
- You know, I think they look pretty good.
- To you, this looks good.
- It looks good.
- This is--
- Oh, ho, ho.
- This is--
- Yeah, I know.
- What the hell?
- I know you think I'm nuts or something.
I don't mind the way that looks.
- It's a comfortable look.
- Yeah.
- I say the same thing people ask me,
"Why did you dress this?"
I say the same thing Heff says when they say,
"Why do you wear the pajamas?"
- Right.
- Comfort, really.
- Comfort, really.
- Yeah.
And for a second, you think maybe the four freshmen are back.
- That's true.
Or possibly the letterman.
- So you'll continue your search.
- We're gonna look for the right look.
Maybe this isn't the right look.
- Ladies and gentlemen, this is our very first program of 1990,
so I thought this would be a good time to reaffirm the pledge
I made to our viewers when this program began.
I, Dave Letterman, pledge myself to the sacred task
of entertaining America through the 1990s.
I've got to push myself to the limit of my abilities
four nights a week for one hour each night.
Unless, of course, I'm not crazy about the guests or the jokes
or I have a head cold or something like that.
This, I solemnly pledge.
So, Director, Hal Gertner.
- Jerry?
- Yes, Hal.
- I'd like to make a pledge.
- Well, sure, Hal, go right ahead.
Hal Gertner making a pledge, kids.
- Take four.
- I, Harold Gertner, pledge what Dave said,
provided there's plenty of coffee and free donuts are all around.
Lift the card up, please.
This, I pledge.
- Thanks, Hal.
- That goes for everybody.
Take two.
- Thank you very much.
Hal, safely protected in the control room.
Well, there you go.
Okay, let's get back to the show.
- Dave.
- What is it?
- Oh, hi, Hal.
- Dave, might as well make a pledge, too.
- One of our page hands, Hal Martin.
- Yes, go ahead, Hal.
- I pledge to execute my duties, but also to break my butt.
Not to break my butt or anything.
After all, it's just a TV show.
- That's right.
- Know what I mean, Dave?
- Yeah, I do know what you mean.
- Okay.
- Thank you very much.
- Hold it.
- Okay.
- Hold it a minute.
- Just one damn minute here.
- Yeah.
- I can't believe what I'm hearing.
Do any of you gold-breaking bastards care anymore?
Or have you all just given up?
We have a responsibility to our viewers.
I, for one, Dave, plan to give and give and give some more
to risk my life, if need be, to provide the highest quality
entertainment to the American viewing public.
This I, Paul Schaefer, pledge.
- Very moving, thank you, thank you very much.
Tomorrow on the program, Dennis Hopper will be joining us,
actor Dennis Hopper.
- And from the Minnesota Zoo, we having contractual problems
with Jack Hanna?
What happened to the Columbus Zoo and Jack Hanna?
We've dumped him, we've turned another page,
we've used up another person,
just burned him out and sent him packing.
He's out of animals, he's done.
So we've moved on to the Minnesota Zoo now.
Steve Martin from the Minnesota Zoo will be here
with exotic birds and Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince
will be joining us.
That will be tomorrow.
We've still got plenty of show tonight, kids.
We'll be right back after this.
- Excuse me, Paul?
Is there supposed to be music here?
Music?
- Hold your horses, just a second.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.
We'll be right back after this.