Name: Val Kilmer On Marlon Brando | David Letterman
Uploaded: 2025-04-02T05:14:36.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Val Kilmer On Marlon Brando | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-04-02. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Val Kilmer On Marlon Brando | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-04-02. Transcript available.

nice to see you val thank you very much for being here how you doing buddy good
you and i you and i
uh i thought for a second there we were dressed alike but i see now it's
possible we're not really
dressed exactly alike how you doing good yeah you want to talk about the movie
first you want to
talk about batman what do you want to talk about um you were batman weren't you
i was you were
the second batman in the third movie is that how that worked
yeah there were two there were three three batman movies and you were the
second of the
two batmen in the third film yeah yeah the hardest part about saying uh no to
it was
having to explain it to my daughter really she's a big batman fan does she like
dad as batman well
she's a big fan of mine and she liked that it's a guaranteed laugh hi my daddy's
batman yeah of course
she can still say that no yeah not anymore by the way she'd be lying yeah so so
i uh i took a job
called the saint uh-huh but that didn't go anywhere with her right now the
saint tell folks what that is
um that's a movie right i did
uh it's a character named simon templar who becomes a saint he's a thief but uh
i took another job where
i'm uh i'm uh the voice of moses wow for for uh dreamworks that's an animated
feature that's it yeah
and uh so i'm i'm the voice of moses so uh that made her feel better well that's
good she gets a
bigger laugh my dad is moses hi my dad is moses yeah so you've you've played
now two great biblical
characters moses and batman yeah that's true um and you also you recently
worked with uh marlon brando i
did yeah yeah do you remember anything from that experience
he's kind of a biblical character yeah kind of a little bit isn't but he's a
for actors this guy is
like a uh an idol a legend he is yeah and everyone else he uh i had a rap uh a
rap party and uh he's
just a regular guy he happens i think people think he might be strange that he
might be unusual well i
wouldn't call him normal he's not he's but he's a genius was he a nice guy have
you ever met any normal
geniuses uh i'm not certain that i've met a genius really i don't know that i
how would i know a dumb
guy like me what the uh so but uh was he friendly was he pleasant was he hospitable
so he's uh just a
down-home guy first day i met him he spoke six languages in an hour really what
what languages do
you do tahitian uh the french were blowing up the ocean right right around his
home so he made a few
calls french german yiddish uh the smallest man in the world was in this film
really yeah in the island
of dr moreau yeah really yeah this guy is like uh 26 inches keep going just
about this tall wow
actually someone told me that uh there's a life-size photograph of him in the
premiere magazine
somewhere actual size yeah it was a fold-out yeah so i'm serious maybe pause
here for a second let
folks see if they have that copy of the magazine up there on your coffee table
take a look at it now
i i when i when we first day of work you know i go in he was on the phone tahiti
and i said you know
and have you met anyone he said no and i said we got to meet the smallest man
in the world oh god where's
he from he's from san juan really and off they went in spanish for about an
hour and a half yeah so
it was an interesting and exciting experience where is that and that's why you
took the part just so
you could work with the brando in a film i would guess right yeah and then they
cut the scene we had
together really so it's not even in the movie oh that's too bad maybe it'll be
in the director's cut
uh you you know there are uh in these magazines like entertainment weekly and
other magazines they talk
about how difficult a person you are to work with and i'm guessing uh being in
show business that
probably not much of those things are true not many of those are true none that
i heard of yeah does
that irritate you when people say things about you well of course it must well
yeah i mean i started
working in august of 94 and uh so i really didn't have a chance to defend
myself right so i uh the hardest
part was calling friends and people that it's embarrassing isn't it it's hard
on you it's hard
on your family when they well this can't be true is it true but they when they
see it in print they
think it might be true well yeah down in africa with michael douglas he's sort
of been through the
ringer and he was helpful he said you know it's hard to take it that way but it's
really a compliment
well i think so because people want to write about you and so they have to make
stuff up but we have
here a list of these things so well if we could we're going to try in 60
minutes we're going to try
and get you to say it ain't over till it's over and so just say uh is it true
or not true when i
when i'd brush on some of these no that's not true okay um you wanted the
director of that movie
island of dr moore to be fired no no not true uh shoved batman uh director shoved
the batman
director no no didn't do that not true um on on the set of tombstone you
grabbed a locust
an extra hat and ate it well that is true
all right
uh you shoved bob dole off stage at a campaign stop last week
you were responsible for the breakup of hall and oats
i was young i reformed they broke up all the notes paul did you know that oh
man
uh it says here you dated share now that didn't happen did it that didn't
really
um
uh let's talk about uh coming back to new york city we were originally from
where from california yeah
california born and raised here in the los angeles area yeah what was that like
as a kid
great to be yeah actually then then i moved here i was 17. so you lived spent
some time here it must be
fun coming back to new york city yeah not dissimilar to africa actually you
know take your life in your
hands oh i see your dwelling yeah but you know new york city is much safer now
than it ever has been
we just you saw as africa yeah well but yeah sure but but there there was no
hope for new york city you
know there there was always hope for africa uh so uh you've been going to africa
for a long time yeah
i just uh love the wilderness and i where do you where do you go in africa down
southern reason is
that sub-saharan yeah yeah i just like saying sub-saharan i'm not even sure
what it means
i like saying sub-saharan i also like saying pacific rim i don't know what that
means either
so uh and and you you are these like uh expeditions little uh safaris that kind
of thing yeah i'm
writing a story another true story like like the ghost in the darkness of an
adventurer who lived
down there and walked in the bush walked over 30 000 miles good heavens have
you ever yourself been
in danger on any of these trips oh sure most most of the time i mean when you're
on foot especially
been surrounded by lion and uh now what do you do when you are surrounded by
wild animals
in that instance i just i thought very sort of cleanly and simply i wonder if i'm
going to get
eaten today yeah just like new york yeah you walk out happen and do the do the
the people who live
there do they tell you what to do in that situation first of all you're not
supposed to find yourself
in that situation i wouldn't think they're not that foolish yeah they don't get
the idea of going
out and looking for right lion or hippo hippo kill more people than anybody
else they're more dangerous
and and tell people why this makes perfect sense well they're so happy looking
they just
look all fluffy and like goofy yeah yeah the people feed me some dried grass
kind of feeling and so
people are drawn to them but these things are enormous there's several tons
yeah and they're mean yeah
and they can they can run very fast at 25 miles an hour wow they just leap
right out of the yeah
i had one pass me on the merit parkway this morning
unbelievable no going about 30 yeah i blew the horn nothing happened um you
want to you want to uh
talk about the the film and then let's show the folks a clip of the movie okay
it's ghost in the
darkness and you say this is a true story it is an absolutely true story in the
mid 1800s when it
takes place uh no turn of the century and uh and uh it's a true story of a irish
engineer that's
why i play john patterson who went out there to build a bridge for the british
government and uh
was stopped by these two lion uh that uh ate over 135 of his fellow workers the
the lions had gone
wacky or something or they they said i think they got very serious yeah you
know they but they normally
wouldn't be just renegade marauding yeah which is an amazing thing in the story
because there's
many scenes in it that seem outrageous or impossible uh but those are the true
parts yeah all right do
you know what we're going to see here no but probably the lions are chasing me
and probably i'm running
away i think it'd be funny if we're just going to take a look at the credits
wouldn't that be nice
uh but all i mean a lot of uh the time i am running away from them because they're
chasing me they
want to eat me it's you and michael douglas yes and and others you would like
to mention uh yeah
about 1500 fantastic black people that were extras they a lot of them got eaten
and the indians um john
carney who's a wonderful black actor from south africa runs the national
theater down there but uh
almost all the scenes i was in the the real lions chasing me here we go let's
take a look at whatever
it happens to be a few minutes from the film it's a bad way to be isn't it i
felt like that here many
many many nights many many nights the uh the film opens um soon the 11th the 11th
good luck i hope it's
a big success for you nice to see you thank you very much for coming in please
come back thank you
you
you