Name: Howard Cosell Doesn't Pull Any Punches | David Letterman
Uploaded: 2025-05-06T15:00:33.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Howard Cosell Doesn't Pull Any Punches | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-05-06. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Howard Cosell Doesn't Pull Any Punches | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-05-06. Transcript available.

Thank you very much. I, uh, I've been a fan of yours for a long, long time, and
I don't mean that in any negative sense, but I've just admired your work.
I understand. I had you in the Battle of the Network Stars.
Yeah, that was, uh, that was silly. We don't really want to talk about that.
You were the worst athlete in the history of the competition.
Yeah, yeah, I think you're right. I think I would have to go along with that,
yeah.
By the way, you were right. Your tie is too wide.
You think it is too wide?
I first saw it without the jacket, which I hadn't seen since they buried Capone.
It's either the tie is too wide or the chest is just too thin. That's the other
way of looking at it.
Either way, there's a fragility about you.
Yeah, now that you mention it, I just don't feel that well suddenly.
Anyway, it's a pleasure to meet you, and let me ask you about your childhood.
What kind of a kid were you? Were you always eloquent and charming and witty
and so forth?
According to my mother, I talked at the age of nine months, but she was always
prone to exaggeration, if not total falsity.
Mom did that, huh?
Yes.
Nine months? You think you were talking at nine months?
If I was, you've got a scoop.
Oh, when do kids start talking? I'm not even sure.
Well, judging by your linguistic ability, very late.
Now, we have some photos here.
Now, this is you as a young man, obviously. What can you tell us about that,
Howard?
Well, I had my own hair.
Yeah.
I was remarkably brilliant even then.
That was taken upon my graduation from law school.
Yeah.
All right.
That's right.
You started out as a lawyer, didn't you?
And this one, I don't think you've even seen, Howard.
This goes way back.
Maybe you can...
There you are.
That was...
My plan then was to be Willie Schumann.
We're just goofing around here.
If you're not, you're in trouble.
Let me ask you about your early relationships with legends in sports.
Jackie Robinson.
Well, that's a serious question.
Yeah.
Jackie Robinson was one of the closest friends of my lifetime and the biggest
influence in my life.
I believed in him very deeply.
He was a whole man and he became part of American history, not just sports
history.
In a nutshell, that's Jackie Robinson.
What were the circumstances for the meeting that you two became friends?
Well, it happened.
He had joined the then Brooklyn Dodgers and his manager, a man named Martin
Stone,
who lived in a little rural village, Pound Ridge, New York, in Upper Westchester
County.
And Martin was a friend of mine.
I met Jackie through him.
And indeed, it was Martin who got me and my wife to move to Pound Ridge to
raise our family.
And Jackie and I helped Martin open a radio station, WVIP, in Mount Kisco,
together with a man who doesn't enjoy your talent or success, Merv Griffin.
And from then on, Jackie and I became fast friends.
He lived in North Stamford, Connecticut, was, in effect, my neighbor.
We used to ride into New York together every day, ride home together every
night.
And he was unconquerable.
That was the word for Jackie Robinson.
I have to assume that the people now, and even people then, average fans,
had no idea the kind of pressure that this man was being subjected to and withstood.
I don't suppose the public ever will, because they're so imbued with the game
and they give it a sanctimony and an importance that's totally out of
proportion of what it deserves,
that they weren't concerned as a group, although many did understand,
with what the man went through.
And the net result was that that remarkable body disintegrated.
He was beset by the most virulent form of diabetes,
never fought it properly, because he would not admit to having had it.
And the very last interview we ever did on national television
was with me as he emerged from Gil Hodges' funeral over in Brooklyn.
We got into a limousine.
He had arrived on Ralph Branca's arm,
and it was amazing to see those kids who were never even...
They didn't recognize Pee Wee Reese, Carl Ferrello, Duke Snyder.
They didn't recognize these great people of yesteryear.
And then suddenly Jackie appeared on Ralph's arm limping.
And as one they stood and they said,
there he is, it was a tremendously touching scene.
That's Jackie Robinson.
What about generally the Dodgers and baseball of that time?
Is it an illusion or was it more exciting as a game then than it is now?
Do you see teams playing with that kind of spirit these days?
I think so.
I think there's a tendency to using nostalgia to make things greater than they
were.
I think there are tremendous things happening in sports today, strikes notwithstanding.
I think within the last two weeks, we saw one of the most remarkable moments I've
ever seen in sport,
when more than 50,000 people in Baltimore, Maryland, having seen their team
lose the pennant to the Milwaukee Brewers,
or at least the division championship,
stayed and stood and cheered for a man named Earl Weaver, who was retiring as
manager.
I think it was one of the most touching scenes I've ever witnessed in sport.
And Baltimore is an imbued city with its team and with its great inner harbor
and a great mayor.
Same thing happened last Saturday night in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania,
with the Pittsburgh Steelers' 50th anniversary dinner.
And as the late Vince Lombardi was wont to say, there is love on this team,
speaking of his Green Bay Packers,
there was love in that room, strike or no strike.
Yeah.
And there is the same kind of spirit.
You mentioned the strike a couple of times, and we don't want to get bogged
down in that.
We want to discuss it.
But there are also just, it seems like maybe the importance of sports has
shifted away from the field.
You know, it's only half of it now is how the game is played and who wins and
who loses and so forth.
Not for the people who read the sports pages,
but for thoughtful people and many of the young people who grew up in the age
of the 60s,
they've come to understand that sport is far more than what happens in the
arena.
Sport today is law, politics, economics, and sociology, and the examples are rife.
The kids who grew up in the 60s, and I raised two daughters in that era,
came to know what life was all about, and they could not look in a mirror
and go through that looking glass and find Camelot in sports world.
Because, after all, that was the decade of the birth of the pill,
the birth of the drug culture, the three assassinations, the unwanted war.
And the decade ended with the national ignominy of the shootout at Kent State.
And the next decade began with the betrayal of the presidency.
I don't want to be heavy on this show, but you asked me a question.
No, sure.
And you're entitled to an education, David.
And the CIA and the FBI disclosures.
So there are a nucleus of people who no longer wanted to view sport
as something separate and apart from human life.
Quite obviously, a change has been made, and we have to pause now for
commercial.
We'll come back and talk more with Mr. Cosell about those changes.
Last night, John Matuszak was here, and we talked with him, obviously, about
the strike.
And he felt like it was time to divide up the wealth.
That was his sentiment.
He said some people are using it for, you know, political moves, perhaps.
But he felt generally it was probably a positive action for the players.
What are your – should it have ever happened, do you think?
No, I don't think the strike should ever have happened, but it happened.
And that's the way it is in American life.
As for John Matuszak, I love him from the time he got out of Tampa
and was a first-round draft choice.
An erratic, crazed flake with an utter brilliance at football
with absolutely no knowledge of the issues or anything else.
And I don't think management has ever said they don't want to divide the wealth.
The issues have been on other matters.
But I do believe the strike will be settled.
There will be an agreement in principle this weekend,
and that football will resume the following weekend.
You think so?
So we're a week away from football?
Well, a week and a half.
A week and a half?
But that's only what I think before they go crazy up there.
Now, again, this is like – now, what about Pete Rozelle?
Could he have prevented this?
Oh, I don't think Alvin could have prevented the strike, no.
Alvin?
Alvin Pete Rozelle.
Oh, Alvin Pete Rozelle.
His name is Alvin.
Oh, I don't know his name is Alvin.
Alvin – no, no, I guess Alvin – what could Alvin do?
Hell, I don't know.
Well, the name like that, it's not easy.
What about the move another Al involved, the Raiders, going from Oakland to Los
Angeles?
Look, any move of any franchise that is profit-making is morally wrong.
But sport, including the National Football League, has been beset not only with
such moves,
but the mere threat of removal brings major cities to their knees
and causes them to disregard the priorities of our life today.
And you take New Jersey with its Meadowlands.
What they need in New Jersey now, and Governor Keene has made it clear,
is federal aid for Newark with all its problems.
Camden, Trenton, Jersey City, Asbury Park.
They brought in casino gambling to keep Atlantic City open.
The last thing in the world they needed was another racetrack.
A football stadium is a front for the racetrack.
And now an indoor arena.
Fans don't like to hear this, because from birth they're taught that sport is
sacrosanct,
the game is everything, winning is everything.
And that's all wrong in a real sense of values in the society.
And having established that, it's time in America to take a searching look at
what sport is all about.
Our whole system of higher education has been introduced.
Mickey Mouse courses, under-the-table payments, falsified transcripts.
A thoughtful man like you, David, lives with problems like this.
Thank you, I do.
And I'm grateful to Howard for pointing that out at this time.
We've got to go away here for station identification.
If you don't mind, you can stick around.
We'd love to continue this discussion.
This is when you're at your best, on station breaks.
Oh, you like the way I do this?
Oh, good.
Thank you very much.
We'll be back with Howard Cosell.
Welcome back to the show.
Howard Cosell is here, and Edward Ruscha will be joining us tomorrow night.
Comedian George Miller, animal expert Warren Eckstein,
investigative reporter Marvin Zindler.
So, of course, we'll have extra security in the audience for Marvin Zindler
tomorrow night.
Howard, quickly.
Now I understand why you're on late night.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
Certain hours of the day, you can't have a Marvin Zindler on without sending
the nation into chaos.
Tell me about Bowie Kuhn.
I guess he's going to be out in a couple of weeks.
Three weeks, yeah.
I think it's over for Bowie.
I think he knows it.
I know he came in here recently.
He's a fighter.
I think he's an honest, decent man.
He goes out with honor.
As you noted earlier, when you laughingly presented the skits that you
presented,
baseball this year has had its greatest attendances ever.
It's had some of its greatest moments ever, like the Earl, not on the playing
field, by the way.
Note this, David, baby.
Remember the fragility or frigidity.
Was it frigidity or fragility?
If it's frigidity, you're in deep trouble.
The hope would be that it's fragility.
No, the Earl Weaver demonstration back in March, the other side of Billy Martin,
a marvelous, marvelous affair
where we raised over $100,000 for the late Kenny Boyer, the former cardinal
manager, cardinal Greed.
And even the L.A. Dodgers encircling La Sorda on the mound and paying tribute
to the fans
when they had their three millionth attendee.
So it's had some very great moments.
And Kuhn is an honest man.
And he's being deposed by a tiny group, one of whom is Nelson Doubleday, who
owns the Mets.
Doubleday says, I don't want revenue sharing.
Kuhn does, I virtually quote.
And I won't have any incompetent owner share with what I make.
I can't match Doubleday's incompetence anywhere else in sports.
Look at the Mets.
Can you imagine that?
Let me, you mentioned something about Billy Martin.
And of course now, apparently, George Steinbrenner has been given permission to
negotiate with him for his services.
Georgie Porchie.
Now, what is, who, why would anybody, George, Billy, anybody, take that
seriously?
They've been through it 92 times.
What makes you think Billy does?
I think Billy Martin will be with the Cleveland Indians next year.
Really?
As opposed to giving, but Oakland was his home and his mom was there and all of
that.
That's correct, but there is a disaffection there for a variety of reasons.
And Cleveland is a city that needs a rebirth.
They're having a rebirth where it matters most, in the city itself, at the
lakeside, and a great mayor there.
But Gabe Paul, who used to work for Steinbrenner, and who was Billy's best
friend when Billy was there with Gabe and Steinbrenner, wants Billy.
And I think Billy has the kind of thinking now where he doesn't want to go in
for a nervous breakdown.
And he will probably go with the Indians, in my opinion.
Okay, another prediction.
What about baseball managers in general?
What about them?
How do they strike you as a breed?
I remember in your book you said that they play cards, they drink too much, and
it's the same dozen or two that keep cycling through.
Is that pretty much a fair assessment?
Well, the first two parts of your statement I don't think are a fair assessment.
But does baseball play musical chairs with managers?
Yes.
And I find it, in your words, a palpable absurdity.
Now, but those weren't my words.
As I was there when I read your book, I said they usually drink heavily, which
is, you know, I don't want to sing to anybody out here.
Some managers do.
Have a taste occasionally.
Yes.
Yeah.
What's wrong with that?
Nothing.
I was responding.
Look at your problem.
I don't have a problem, but I was responding.
You said it in the book.
Why do you say that so self-protestingly?
I don't have a drinking problem.
Oh, I got plenty.
I got all kinds of other problems.
But no, not the other one, no.
Yeah.
No, only there are some people who take drinks, yeah.
Yeah.
Now, do you feel, what about the worth to a manager on a ball club?
Does he really make a difference, or did he just?
I think the difference that a manager makes is grossly overrated, generally
speaking, but there are exceptions.
This year, Wadi Herzog proved what a manager can do, tearing apart and
reconstructing a ball club and making it a winner.
A lot of people didn't think it was possible.
Sure.
And in St. Louis, many criticized his moves.
But he was also acting as a general manager there, wasn't he? More than just a
field manager?
Yes.
Yeah.
In that particular case, that's true.
I think Earl Weaver was an exceptional leader of men.
How long has Monday Night Football been on the air? 10 years? 11 years?
We are into our 13th year.
13th year.
Would you ever consider going into something else?
Do you go home at night and think, jeez, I'd rather have a game show, or I'd
rather be in Congress, or...
Often.
What would you...
I blew it in 1976.
I won the run for the Senate.
At the behest of my family, I didn't.
I never wanted to be a sports commentator in the first place.
I wanted to be in news and broadcast, but the fates had it otherwise.
With your help and Johnny Carson's help, I became a legend.
Well, you can't do better than that.
Nice to see you again.
Good luck to you.
What an extraordinary moment for you.
It was nice.
I enjoyed that.
Howard Cosell.
We're going to pause here.
We'll be back with the people behind late night.

Howard Cosell Doesn't Pull Any Punches | David Letterman

Thank you very much. I, uh, I've been a fan of yours for a long, long time, and
I don't mean that in any negative sense, but I've just admired your work.
I understand. I had you in the Battle of the Network Stars.
Yeah, that was, uh, that was silly. We don't really want to talk about that.
You were the worst athlete in the history of the competition.
Yeah, yeah, I think you're right. I think I would have to go along with that,
yeah.
By the way, you were right. Your tie is too wide.
You think it is too wide?
I first saw it without the jacket, which I hadn't seen since they buried Capone.
It's either the tie is too wide or the chest is just too thin. That's the other
way of looking at it.
Either way, there's a fragility about you.
Yeah, now that you mention it, I just don't feel that well suddenly.
Anyway, it's a pleasure to meet you, and let me ask you about your childhood.
What kind of a kid were you? Were you always eloquent and charming and witty
and so forth?
According to my mother, I talked at the age of nine months, but she was always
prone to exaggeration, if not total falsity.
Mom did that, huh?
Yes.
Nine months? You think you were talking at nine months?
If I was, you've got a scoop.
Oh, when do kids start talking? I'm not even sure.
Well, judging by your linguistic ability, very late.
Now, we have some photos here.
Now, this is you as a young man, obviously. What can you tell us about that,
Howard?
Well, I had my own hair.
Yeah.
I was remarkably brilliant even then.
That was taken upon my graduation from law school.
Yeah.
All right.
That's right.
You started out as a lawyer, didn't you?
And this one, I don't think you've even seen, Howard.
This goes way back.
Maybe you can...
There you are.
That was...
My plan then was to be Willie Schumann.
We're just goofing around here.
If you're not, you're in trouble.
Let me ask you about your early relationships with legends in sports.
Jackie Robinson.
Well, that's a serious question.
Yeah.
Jackie Robinson was one of the closest friends of my lifetime and the biggest
influence in my life.
I believed in him very deeply.
He was a whole man and he became part of American history, not just sports
history.
In a nutshell, that's Jackie Robinson.
What were the circumstances for the meeting that you two became friends?
Well, it happened.
He had joined the then Brooklyn Dodgers and his manager, a man named Martin
Stone,
who lived in a little rural village, Pound Ridge, New York, in Upper Westchester
County.
And Martin was a friend of mine.
I met Jackie through him.
And indeed, it was Martin who got me and my wife to move to Pound Ridge to
raise our family.
And Jackie and I helped Martin open a radio station, WVIP, in Mount Kisco,
together with a man who doesn't enjoy your talent or success, Merv Griffin.
And from then on, Jackie and I became fast friends.
He lived in North Stamford, Connecticut, was, in effect, my neighbor.
We used to ride into New York together every day, ride home together every
night.
And he was unconquerable.
That was the word for Jackie Robinson.
I have to assume that the people now, and even people then, average fans,
had no idea the kind of pressure that this man was being subjected to and withstood.
I don't suppose the public ever will, because they're so imbued with the game
and they give it a sanctimony and an importance that's totally out of
proportion of what it deserves,
that they weren't concerned as a group, although many did understand,
with what the man went through.
And the net result was that that remarkable body disintegrated.
He was beset by the most virulent form of diabetes,
never fought it properly, because he would not admit to having had it.
And the very last interview we ever did on national television
was with me as he emerged from Gil Hodges' funeral over in Brooklyn.
We got into a limousine.
He had arrived on Ralph Branca's arm,
and it was amazing to see those kids who were never even...
They didn't recognize Pee Wee Reese, Carl Ferrello, Duke Snyder.
They didn't recognize these great people of yesteryear.
And then suddenly Jackie appeared on Ralph's arm limping.
And as one they stood and they said,
there he is, it was a tremendously touching scene.
That's Jackie Robinson.
What about generally the Dodgers and baseball of that time?
Is it an illusion or was it more exciting as a game then than it is now?
Do you see teams playing with that kind of spirit these days?
I think so.
I think there's a tendency to using nostalgia to make things greater than they
were.
I think there are tremendous things happening in sports today, strikes notwithstanding.
I think within the last two weeks, we saw one of the most remarkable moments I've
ever seen in sport,
when more than 50,000 people in Baltimore, Maryland, having seen their team
lose the pennant to the Milwaukee Brewers,
or at least the division championship,
stayed and stood and cheered for a man named Earl Weaver, who was retiring as
manager.
I think it was one of the most touching scenes I've ever witnessed in sport.
And Baltimore is an imbued city with its team and with its great inner harbor
and a great mayor.
Same thing happened last Saturday night in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania,
with the Pittsburgh Steelers' 50th anniversary dinner.
And as the late Vince Lombardi was wont to say, there is love on this team,
speaking of his Green Bay Packers,
there was love in that room, strike or no strike.
Yeah.
And there is the same kind of spirit.
You mentioned the strike a couple of times, and we don't want to get bogged
down in that.
We want to discuss it.
But there are also just, it seems like maybe the importance of sports has
shifted away from the field.
You know, it's only half of it now is how the game is played and who wins and
who loses and so forth.
Not for the people who read the sports pages,
but for thoughtful people and many of the young people who grew up in the age
of the 60s,
they've come to understand that sport is far more than what happens in the
arena.
Sport today is law, politics, economics, and sociology, and the examples are rife.
The kids who grew up in the 60s, and I raised two daughters in that era,
came to know what life was all about, and they could not look in a mirror
and go through that looking glass and find Camelot in sports world.
Because, after all, that was the decade of the birth of the pill,
the birth of the drug culture, the three assassinations, the unwanted war.
And the decade ended with the national ignominy of the shootout at Kent State.
And the next decade began with the betrayal of the presidency.
I don't want to be heavy on this show, but you asked me a question.
No, sure.
And you're entitled to an education, David.
And the CIA and the FBI disclosures.
So there are a nucleus of people who no longer wanted to view sport
as something separate and apart from human life.
Quite obviously, a change has been made, and we have to pause now for
commercial.
We'll come back and talk more with Mr. Cosell about those changes.
Last night, John Matuszak was here, and we talked with him, obviously, about
the strike.
And he felt like it was time to divide up the wealth.
That was his sentiment.
He said some people are using it for, you know, political moves, perhaps.
But he felt generally it was probably a positive action for the players.
What are your – should it have ever happened, do you think?
No, I don't think the strike should ever have happened, but it happened.
And that's the way it is in American life.
As for John Matuszak, I love him from the time he got out of Tampa
and was a first-round draft choice.
An erratic, crazed flake with an utter brilliance at football
with absolutely no knowledge of the issues or anything else.
And I don't think management has ever said they don't want to divide the wealth.
The issues have been on other matters.
But I do believe the strike will be settled.
There will be an agreement in principle this weekend,
and that football will resume the following weekend.
You think so?
So we're a week away from football?
Well, a week and a half.
A week and a half?
But that's only what I think before they go crazy up there.
Now, again, this is like – now, what about Pete Rozelle?
Could he have prevented this?
Oh, I don't think Alvin could have prevented the strike, no.
Alvin?
Alvin Pete Rozelle.
Oh, Alvin Pete Rozelle.
His name is Alvin.
Oh, I don't know his name is Alvin.
Alvin – no, no, I guess Alvin – what could Alvin do?
Hell, I don't know.
Well, the name like that, it's not easy.
What about the move another Al involved, the Raiders, going from Oakland to Los
Angeles?
Look, any move of any franchise that is profit-making is morally wrong.
But sport, including the National Football League, has been beset not only with
such moves,
but the mere threat of removal brings major cities to their knees
and causes them to disregard the priorities of our life today.
And you take New Jersey with its Meadowlands.
What they need in New Jersey now, and Governor Keene has made it clear,
is federal aid for Newark with all its problems.
Camden, Trenton, Jersey City, Asbury Park.
They brought in casino gambling to keep Atlantic City open.
The last thing in the world they needed was another racetrack.
A football stadium is a front for the racetrack.
And now an indoor arena.
Fans don't like to hear this, because from birth they're taught that sport is
sacrosanct,
the game is everything, winning is everything.
And that's all wrong in a real sense of values in the society.
And having established that, it's time in America to take a searching look at
what sport is all about.
Our whole system of higher education has been introduced.
Mickey Mouse courses, under-the-table payments, falsified transcripts.
A thoughtful man like you, David, lives with problems like this.
Thank you, I do.
And I'm grateful to Howard for pointing that out at this time.
We've got to go away here for station identification.
If you don't mind, you can stick around.
We'd love to continue this discussion.
This is when you're at your best, on station breaks.
Oh, you like the way I do this?
Oh, good.
Thank you very much.
We'll be back with Howard Cosell.
Welcome back to the show.
Howard Cosell is here, and Edward Ruscha will be joining us tomorrow night.
Comedian George Miller, animal expert Warren Eckstein,
investigative reporter Marvin Zindler.
So, of course, we'll have extra security in the audience for Marvin Zindler
tomorrow night.
Howard, quickly.
Now I understand why you're on late night.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
Certain hours of the day, you can't have a Marvin Zindler on without sending
the nation into chaos.
Tell me about Bowie Kuhn.
I guess he's going to be out in a couple of weeks.
Three weeks, yeah.
I think it's over for Bowie.
I think he knows it.
I know he came in here recently.
He's a fighter.
I think he's an honest, decent man.
He goes out with honor.
As you noted earlier, when you laughingly presented the skits that you
presented,
baseball this year has had its greatest attendances ever.
It's had some of its greatest moments ever, like the Earl, not on the playing
field, by the way.
Note this, David, baby.
Remember the fragility or frigidity.
Was it frigidity or fragility?
If it's frigidity, you're in deep trouble.
The hope would be that it's fragility.
No, the Earl Weaver demonstration back in March, the other side of Billy Martin,
a marvelous, marvelous affair
where we raised over $100,000 for the late Kenny Boyer, the former cardinal
manager, cardinal Greed.
And even the L.A. Dodgers encircling La Sorda on the mound and paying tribute
to the fans
when they had their three millionth attendee.
So it's had some very great moments.
And Kuhn is an honest man.
And he's being deposed by a tiny group, one of whom is Nelson Doubleday, who
owns the Mets.
Doubleday says, I don't want revenue sharing.
Kuhn does, I virtually quote.
And I won't have any incompetent owner share with what I make.
I can't match Doubleday's incompetence anywhere el