Name: Memorial Day Fun On The Weekend Late Show | David Letterman
Uploaded: 2025-05-26T15:00:22.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Memorial Day Fun On The Weekend Late Show | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-05-26. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Memorial Day Fun On The Weekend Late Show | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-05-26. Transcript available.

You know what, ladies and gentlemen, before we get any farther into the show,
let's check in with Bruce and Linda, see what's coming up Saturday on the Weekend
Late Show.
Kids, take it away, Bruce, Linda.
Thanks, Dave. And happy unofficial start of summer.
What a weekend coming up. Monday off, the Indy 500, and my favorite, we kick
off the barbecue season.
Kiss the cook.
Oh, I bet you have one of those silly aprons.
I have a whole collection.
Well, you should wear one Saturday when we show how to prepare your entire
Memorial Day meal,
starters, sides, even desserts, right on the grill. Bring your appetite.
I can't wait. We'll also test the newest sunscreens to find out which ones are
strongest and work the longest.
Fascinating.
And our own Wink Wilson will meet a man who has the largest known collection of
Indianapolis 500 memorabilia.
He's turned his basement into a museum.
Neat. All that, plus pawn shops, decorating your patio, and a visit to a firing
range,
Saturday on the Weekend Late Show. Back to you, Dave.
Wow, that's some show. That's really a fantastic show.
Ladies and gentlemen, here's tonight's Top Ten List. Let's go.
Category Top Ten Things You Don't Want to Hear at a Barbecue.
A lot of people get together and barbecue, and I love nothing more than grilled
meats.
And in particular, I love grilled organ meats, which you don't find those often
enough for my likes.
The miscellaneous meats.
The grilled organ meats is what I crave.
Sweet breads. Sweet grilled sweet breads.
Tripe.
Tripe.
Can't get enough of it.
The organ meats.
Stomach lining.
Something like that.
Beautiful. You love your stomach lining.
So now, these are things that you don't want to hear when you're at a barbecue.
I'll tell you what I love to hear at a barbecue.
What do you like to hear?
Hey, the steak is ready.
Yeah.
That, I'm crazy, but the corn is perfect.
Yeah.
You love to hear those things.
You won't find that.
What?
You won't find that on this list.
Why not?
What is this?
Because this list is things you don't want to hear.
Things you do not want to hear at a barbecue.
Don't want to hear at a barbecue.
All right.
Here we go.
Number 10.
We're out of charcoal.
Light up a tire.
Light up a tire.
Number 9.
Who wants to lick the grill?
Number 8.
That ain't lemonade.
Number 7.
If the smoke from the grill bothers you, just crack open a window.
Number 6.
10 minutes until lockdown.
Number 5.
Why is my hot dog wearing nail polish?
Uh-oh.
Number 4.
Heimlich.
Heimlich.
Heimlich.
I don't like to hear that.
Number 3.
Hello.
9-1-1.
It's me again.
Number 2.
Look.
Dave's here.
Hey, wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
How did you?
Who slid that in?
And the number 1 thing you don't want to hear at a barbecue.
Please, Mom.
Put your top on.
There you go.
.