Name: Chris Elliott's Botched Hair Transplant | David Letterman
Uploaded: 2025-06-16T15:01:18.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Chris Elliott's Botched Hair Transplant | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-06-16. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Chris Elliott's Botched Hair Transplant | David Letterman' from Letterman on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-06-16. Transcript available.

The Squeeze will be here.
I don't recall ever having Squeeze on the show, but there will be.
Hi, how are you?
Nice to see you.
Chris Elliott.
Ladies and gentlemen.
Chris Elliott.
Thank you.
How you doing?
Well, it's been an awfully long time since then.
Gosh, it's been too long, hasn't it?
Thank you for dropping by.
What are you doing here?
Well, I was just upstairs going through my fan mail
and saw the monitor and saw your little show,
and I know your fellows are on strike.
Writers are still out on strike.
So I thought maybe I'd come down and give you a hand.
Great.
Did you prepare a little, you know, comedy, a little skit, a little something?
No, I couldn't think of anything funny to do.
So what I thought...
It seems to be catching, doesn't it?
Yeah, it does.
What I thought I'd do, if it's all right with everybody,
is besides be here and kind of support you.
Thank you.
I appreciate that.
It's balanced my checkbook, if that's okay,
because I've got a little bit of time on my hands.
Balance the old checkbook.
Yeah, because I could use the time right now to do it.
Do you have an extension cord over there?
AC, sure.
I'm sorry if this is kind of awkward.
One of those pocket calculators that are so popular.
I know.
It's my wife gave this to me.
That's a lovely gift.
What is that, a Univac?
Is that...
Lights are going to dim in here.
Okay.
Is that...
There you go.
Yeah, it's hot.
It'll go.
Okay.
All right.
We've got to just give it a second here.
Okay.
Just to warm up.
Yeah.
What have you been doing the last five months?
You know, I've been doing nothing.
And when I say that, I literally mean I've been doing absolutely nothing.
I did.
I saw Roger Rabbit.
Have people seen this movie?
The movie Roger Rabbit?
Who framed Roger Rabbit?
This is a terrific...
It's a French film, a foreign film.
Have you seen it?
No.
I haven't seen it.
I don't think it's a foreign film.
He goes, no, it's foreign.
It's all dubbed in.
I don't think it is.
They have real life people like you and me.
Bob Hoskins.
I don't know who that is, but they have real people.
And then they have cartoons.
And the real people in the cartoons talk to one another.
And they pass each other objects, mix each other drinks, do such...
And they do it marvelously, the animation and the real life.
I would recommend it.
It's the one film I really cried at.
Because at the end, you don't know if he's dead or if he's alive
or if he's going to go on the spaceship or whatever.
And that...
Spaceship?
That tugs at your emotions.
Is he dead or is he not dead at the end of the movie?
That's what tugs at your emotions.
You don't know.
And I don't want to give it away, but go see it.
Well, no, no, you do know.
He's either dead or he's not dead.
But listen, I don't want to give it...
This isn't warmed up yet at all.
This is going to be a little bit...
Have you seen any other films besides Roger Rabbit?
I saw Who's That Girl?
Uh-huh.
But that was on HBO.
Right, sure.
And, you know, it wasn't as good as Who Framed Roger Rabbit.
It was good.
Right.
You know, it was a good film, but it's not as funny as Roger Rabbit.
Okay.
They were going after that Billy Wilder, Marilyn Monroe thing, I think.
Yeah, that is why.
Okay, I think this is...
Is he dead or not dead at the end of the movie?
I don't know and I don't want to give it away, but it tugs at your heartstrings.
Does he get shot?
Does he get hit?
What happens?
Well, yeah, well, yeah, he gets kind of shot.
See, I haven't seen it and I'm not going to see it.
Well...
Just tell me.
No, you should see it.
You should see it.
I'm not one who goes after these foreign films, but this one's terrific.
Because I think we make great films right here in the U.S. of A.
Well, that's good.
Well, now this isn't...
There we go.
Yeah.
This will just be...
What is that?
That's what?
Now, is this my imagination?
Does that look like inflatable rubber raft to you?
Right over here?
Inflatable rubber boat, it looks like.
Yeah.
Actually, it looks like three inflatable rubber boats.
I have no idea.
That's my handwriting.
I wrote that.
I put that down.
I have no idea what that's for.
When's the date on that?
July 15th.
So pretty recently, then?
Yeah, like last week.
No idea.
No idea.
I'm sure I need...
Do I like rubber rafts?
Well, you probably do now.
Probably growing to like them.
Well, look, Dave.
I got a doctor's appointment, so I think...
Really?
Are you feeling all right?
Yeah.
No, fine.
I just...
I'm having a plug session.
I'm sorry?
A plug session.
I'm getting a hair transplant.
I don't know if you can see it or not.
Jeez.
Okay.
It's going very well.
I'm doing after that Patrick Swayze one.
All right.
Well, good luck to you, Chris.
Oh, thanks.
Thanks very much.
Thanks for coming.
See you.
Good evening.
Good evening.
Hi, Chris.
Nice to see you.
Dave, how are you?
You just dropped by.
I really appreciate that.
Well, you know what?
Thank you very much.
I was upstairs, and I was watching your little show on the monitor, and I
thought I'd slip
by security and come out and flood the place with sunshine.
Well, that's great.
So here I am.
You look terrific.
What have you been doing?
Well, thanks.
Actually, not a whole lot.
I've been doing a lot of this and that.
I just finished a stint on Sesame Street.
Oh, that's great.
I've seen that.
They have celebrities come on, and they teach the kids the alphabet.
They teach them how to count.
They teach them about colors.
Right.
Colors, that sort of thing.
That must have been a lot of fun.
Well, that's not what I did.
I was actually Big Bird's left leg.
Oh, is that right?
Yeah.
There are two other guys, smaller guys that run the right leg, and then there
are five
guys up top.
So there's eight of us all together.
Eight guys in that suit?
Yeah.
It's unbelievable.
It's an incredible thing.
And it gets pretty hot in this, so we work without our shirts.
Well, is there anything else you've been up to this summer?
Not really.
I saw Roger Rabbit.
Now, have I talked to you about Roger Rabbit?
Now, the last time you were here, you mentioned that you've seen Roger Rabbit.
Did I mention it to you?
I saw it again.
You saw it again.
Have we seen this?
This is the foreign film.
Isn't it terrific?
More people have seen it since I was on the show.
This is the German film that everyone is raving about that is half animation,
half real life.
It's sort of like Bambi meets Das Boot, and it is terrific.
If I could say go see one movie, it would be that.
One thing that occurred to me when I saw it this time is why haven't people
marketed this
film?
Why don't you see Roger Rabbit t-shirts, Roger Rabbit hats, that sort of thing?
So on the subway, something occurred to me, and what I think I'm going to do is
try to
go over to Disney and pitch this.
I came up with a couple of prototypes.
This would be like the Roger Rabbit ballpoint pen.
I don't know where to show this.
These would be little bunny ears here on the pen.
Yeah, that's nice.
Yeah, this is just something I'd like to do.
Now, would that be for the kids?
This would be for the kids.
Kids of all ages, probably.
And they would probably hot glue the ears when they put it together.
Uh-huh.
And then this is going to be the Roger Rabbit doll.
I don't know where to show this.
Yeah, right over there.
That's just a sketch.
But you know, Chris, they have all of that stuff.
They have hats, and they have shirts, and they have, you go to McDonald's, you
get a Roger
Roger Rabbit.
So I'm hopefully going to make a lot of money with these ideas.
And so what else?
You got to...
Well, can I tell you the real reason I came by tonight?
Sure, yeah.
You all probably can see my hair came in.
Yeah, very nice.
Thank you.
I...
It looks great.
Thanks.
You look like a wrestler, and that's good.
The last time I was here, I was still undergoing the plug session.
Oh, that's right.
I remember.
And I think you might have a...
Yeah, it looked...
Oh, yeah.
Here I am.
Luckily, everything worked out.
You can see it came in great.
Now, how do they do that?
They take the hair from way down on the back of your neck, right?
And then they actually transplant it to the front of your...
Well, you know, that's how they usually do it.
For some reason with me, and I honestly still don't know why, they took the
hair from my
inner thighs and transferred it.
And it actually was very painful, all in all.
But I'm happy with the results, although I won't be wearing any shorts this
summer.
Well, a small price...
For obvious reasons.
Yeah, but certainly a small price to pay for that.
Sure, sure.
I think so.
Yeah.
Let me tell you something.
The reason I'm doing all this, the hair, the eye job...
You had an eye job.
I had an eye job and nose and chin.
And, of course, the chest enhancement is because of something I'm very happy
about.
In a couple of weeks, I'm going to go on the road with the Dirty Dancing Tour.
Oh, boy.
Thank you.
That's great.
Well, thank you.
Paul, thank you.
And I'm pretty happy about it.
Maybe you'd like me to do a little Dirty Dancing for you right now.
Let me tell you something.
As God is my witness, and for the studio audience here and all our home viewers
that are watching,
there is no way, no how, no possibility I am going to get out here and do my Dirty
Dancing
unless you get out here and do a little Dirty Dancing.
I think he's going to do it.
No, no, no.
I'd love to, but I have to make some toast.
So you go ahead and...
I'll do it myself.
Yeah, that's fine.
Now, one thing I do have to ask.
Do I have enough time for...
Al, do we have enough time for Chris to do this for us?
Sure.
Because it's a five-minute routine, and I need it.
I don't want to break up the five-minute routine, so we have enough time.
Yeah, I guess we do.
Okay, good.
Okay, here we go.
If I could have a little music.
It's really almost filthy dancing when you get down to it.
Okay, let's hear the music now.
Dude.
Oh.
I think that's...
Tomorrow on the program, Mark...
Thank you.
Thank you.
Chris Elliott, ladies and gentlemen.
Chris, nice to see you.
Oh, boy.
Well, nice to see you.
I was just downstairs in the drug store.
Well, Chris, seriously, if you're going to wear shirts like that, do some sit-ups.
Right now?
No, no.
Think about it, though.
Listen, I was downstairs.
I was getting some ointment, and I saw your show on the monitor at the Raymart
down there,
and I thought I would...
They have it on the monitor.
They have it on the monitor, and I thought I'd strut my stuff out here and sit
it right
down here.
Great.
Nice to have you here.
Now, I noticed that you're wearing your Roy Clark hat tonight.
Yeah, I am.
I am.
Is there a reason for that?
All right.
Well, I'm sorry you brought that up, but, yeah, there is kind of a reason for
it.
I don't know if any of you have noticed or been watching the show in the last
couple of
weeks, I've been undergoing a hair transplant.
Right.
I think you have a before and after shot.
That's the before.
Uh-huh.
Right.
And there's the after.
Yeah.
And the last time you were here, you looked great.
You had a healthy full...
No, it all worked out well.
Well, I found out that there was actually another after, after that after, and
that's what this
is.
Oh, my God.
That's, uh...
Geez.
What happened exactly?
Well, they were using that thigh hair, and I don't think that that, uh...
It didn't take...
No, the thigh hair didn't take at all.
So, anyway, listen...
It looks like it might be infected back there on the side.
No, it itches.
Yeah.
Oddly enough.
So, how's the big tour going?
You were on a tour last...
You just pulled some out.
Did I get...
Oh.
You know, that happens without me...
Now, don't do that.
Oh, God.
Yeah, I was on the Dirty Dancing Tour, actually.
And, uh...
Well, actually, I'm on a leave of absence.
What happened?
From the Dirty...
It wasn't going too well.
We were down south, and every time I got up there and did a little, you know,
shaking,
the locals threw liquor bottles at me.
Well, that's...
That can be discouraging.
Yeah, so I think if I go back out with them, they're going to keep me in the
back of the
group, which I think is really all the best.
But you're enjoying it, nonetheless.
I was enjoying it.
So, anyway, listen, since your writers are still on strike, I thought maybe I'd
come out
and, uh, fill a little time with you.
Right.
But, you know, the strike's over and the writers are back.
Well...
Writers are back.
Were they back last night?
Back last night?
Back today.
Two full days.
Been back working really hard.
So, do you mean all that stuff with, uh, that girl, Bridget Jackson, that was
all written?
It was planned by the writers.
She's dynamite, by the way.
Yeah, thank you.
We're very fond of her.
Well, as long as you're happy, I'm happy, Dave.
That's fine.
Listen, I, uh, have...
Do you know anybody at Regis Philbin's show?
No, I don't.
I don't.
Have you seen...
I'm sorry to interrupt, but did you see Roger...
What, dear?
I said, have you seen Roger Rabbit anymore?
Don't bring that up, please.
I, I...
Well, you brought it up.
I saw Roger Rabbit, I loved it, and I said it on the show.
People from Disney.
Right, you really, you raved about it.
I raved about it, and actually, I've gotten a certified letter from Disney
telling me actually
not to promote their film.
Oh, that's too bad.
Um, and in fact, urging me not to go see it anymore.
And I don't really know why.
I guess it has something to do with my image.
I'm not really sure with that.
Okay.
All right, now.
Dave, I have here, the reason I ask about Regis Philbin is because I've been
trying to get
to that show all week, and they won't return my calls.
Um, I have an idea for a demo that I think is great.
It's called Closet Treasures.
What you do...
Closet Treasures?
Treasures.
Yeah.
What you do, I, I just thought of the name.
You go into your closet...
And instead of...
Instead of spending all that money at Bloomy's or Alexander's or wherever, you
just go in
there and find whatever you have around.
Right.
And I brought some closet treasures out of my closet.
You're talking about what here?
Accessories?
Well, just accessories.
That's the way you can look dressed up by just using accessories.
And I thought maybe I'd show you a couple of things.
Like right here, here's just a scarf that was in there.
Right.
And see, you can just wrap it around just like that.
I don't know which tree to show this to.
Right over there.
That's great.
See, and that's just kind of a fun tie.
Yeah.
See how that hangs down like that?
It looks...
It's really like one of the sweat bustiers that the man in World War I wore.
It looks, uh, looks really stupid.
That's great.
Well, I've got kind of a little surprise for all of you.
What we're going to do is accessorize David Letterman.
No, we're not.
So...
That's it.
Well, it's...
Chris Elliott, ladies and gentlemen.
Let's get you up here and we're going to just wrap this around you.
Thank you very much for being here.
Here's the boy.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.
Thank you very much for being here.

Chris Elliott's Botched Hair Transplant | David Letterman

The Squeeze will be here.
I don't recall ever having Squeeze on the show, but there will be.
Hi, how are you?
Nice to see you.
Chris Elliott.
Ladies and gentlemen.
Chris Elliott.
Thank you.
How you doing?
Well, it's been an awfully long time since then.
Gosh, it's been too long, hasn't it?
Thank you for dropping by.
What are you doing here?
Well, I was just upstairs going through my fan mail
and saw the monitor and saw your little show,
and I know your fellows are on strike.
Writers are still out on strike.
So I thought maybe I'd come down and give you a hand.
Great.
Did you prepare a little, you know, comedy, a little skit, a little something?
No, I couldn't think of anything funny to do.
So what I thought...
It seems to be catching, doesn't it?
Yeah, it does.
What I thought I'd do, if it's all right with everybody,
is besides be here and kind of support you.
Thank you.
I appreciate that.
It's balanced my checkbook, if that's okay,
because I've got a little bit of time on my hands.
Balance the old checkbook.
Yeah, because I could use the time right now to do it.
Do you have an extension cord over there?
AC, sure.
I'm sorry if this is kind of awkward.
One of those pocket calculators that are so popular.
I know.
It's my wife gave this to me.
That's a lovely gift.
What is that, a Univac?
Is that...
Lights are going to dim in here.
Okay.
Is that...
There you go.
Yeah, it's hot.
It'll go.
Okay.
All right.
We've got to just give it a second here.
Okay.
Just to warm up.
Yeah.
What have you been doing the last five months?
You know, I've been doing nothing.
And when I say that, I literally mean I've been doing absolutely nothing.
I did.
I saw Roger Rabbit.
Have people seen this movie?
The movie Roger Rabbit?
Who framed Roger Rabbit?
This is a terrific...
It's a French film, a foreign film.
Have you seen it?
No.
I haven't seen it.
I don't think it's a foreign film.
He goes, no, it's foreign.
It's all dubbed in.
I don't think it is.
They have real life people like you and me.
Bob Hoskins.
I don't know who that is, but they have real people.
And then they have cartoons.
And the real people in the cartoons talk to one another.
And they pass each other objects, mix each other drinks, do such...
And they do it marvelously, the animation and the real life.
I would recommend it.
It's the one film I really cried at.
Because at the end, you don't know if he's dead or if he's alive
or if he's going to go on the spaceship or whatever.
And that...
Spaceship?
That tugs at your emotions.
Is he dead or is he not dead at the end of the movie?
That's what tugs at your emotions.
You don't know.
And I don't want to give it away, but go see it.
Well, no, no, you do know.
He's either dead or he's not dead.
But listen, I don't want to give it...
This isn't warmed up yet at all.
This is going to be a little bit...
Have you seen any other films besides Roger Rabbit?
I saw Who's That Girl?
Uh-huh.
But that was on HBO.
Right, sure.
And, you know, it wasn't as good as Who Framed Roger Rabbit.
It was good.
Right.
You know, it was a good film, but it's not as funny as Roger Rabbit.
Okay.
They were going after that Billy Wilder, Marilyn Monroe thing, I think.
Yeah, that is why.
Okay, I think this is...
Is he dead or not dead at the end of the movie?
I don't know and I don't want to give it away, but it tugs at your heartstrings.
Does he get shot?
Does he get hit?
What happens?
Well, yeah, well, yeah, he gets kind of shot.
See, I haven't seen it and I'm not going to see it.
Well...
Just tell me.
No, you should see it.
You should see it.
I'm not one who goes after these foreign films, but this one's terrific.
Because I think we make great films right here in the U.S. of A.
Well, that's good.
Well, now this isn't...
There we go.
Yeah.
This will just be...
What is that?
That's what?
Now, is this my imagination?
Does that look like inflatable rubber raft to you?
Right over here?
Inflatable rubber boat, it looks like.
Yeah.
Actually, it looks like three inflatable rubber boats.
I have no idea.
That's my handwriting.
I wrote that.
I put that down.
I have no idea what that's for.
When's the date on that?
July 15th.
So pretty recently, then?
Yeah, like last week.
No idea.
No idea.
I'm sure I need...
Do I like rubber rafts?
Well, you probably do now.
Probably growing to like them.
Well, look, Dave.
I got a doctor's appointment, so I think...
Really?
Are you feeling all right?
Yeah.
No, fine.
I just...
I'm having a plug session.
I'm sorry?
A plug session.
I'm getting a hair transplant.
I don't know if you can see it or not.
Jeez.
Okay.
It's going very well.
I'm doing after that Patrick Swayze one.
All right.
Well, good luck to you, Chris.
Oh, thanks.
Thanks very much.
Thanks for coming.
See you.
Good evening.
Good evening.
Hi, Chris.
Nice to see you.
Dave, how are you?
You just dropped by.
I really appreciate that.
Well, you know what?
Thank you very much.
I was upstairs, and I was watching your little show on the monitor, and I
thought I'd slip
by security and come out and flood the place with sunshine.
Well, that's great.
So here I am.
You look terrific.
What have you been doing?
Well, thanks.
Actually, not a whole lot.
I've been doing a lot of this and that.
I just finished a stint on Sesame Street.
Oh, that's great.
I've seen that.
They have celebrities come on, and they teach the kids the alphabet.
They teach them how to count.
They teach them about colors.
Right.
Colors, that sort of thing.
That must have been a lot of fun.
Well, that's not what I did.
I was actually Big Bird's left leg.
Oh, is that right?
Yeah.
There are two other guys, smaller guys that run the right leg, and then there
are five
guys up top.
So there's eight of us all together.
Eight guys in that suit?
Yeah.
It's unbelievable.
It's an incredible thing.
And it gets pretty hot in this, so we work without our shirts.
Well, is there anything else you've been up to this summer?
Not really.
I saw Roger Rabbit.
Now, have I talked to you about Roger Rabbit?
Now, the last time you were here, you mentioned that you've seen Roger Rabbit.
Did I mention it to you?
I saw it again.
You saw it again.
Have we seen this?
This is the foreign film.
Isn't it terrific?
More people have seen it since I was on the show.
This is the German film that everyone is raving about that is half animation,
half real life.
It's sort of like Bambi meets Das Boot, and it is terrific.
If I could say go see one movie, it would be that.
One thing that occurred to me when I saw it this time is why haven't people
marketed this
film?
Why don't you see Roger Rabbit t-shirts, Roger Rabbit hats, that sort of thing?
So on the subway, something occurred to me, and what I think I'm going to do is
try to
go over to Disney and pitch this.
I came up with a couple of prototypes.
This would be like the Roger Rabbit ballpoint pen.
I don't know where to show this.
These would be little bunny ears here on the pen.
Yeah, that's nice.
Yeah, this is just something I'd like to do.
Now, would that be for the kids?
This would be for the kids.
Kids of all ages, probably.
And they would probably hot glue the ears when they put it together.
Uh-huh.
And then this is going to be the Roger Rabbit doll.
I don't know where to show this.
Yeah, right over there.
That's just a sketch.
But you know, Chris, they have all of that stuff.
They have hats, and they have shirts, and they have, you go to McDonald's, you
get a Roger
Roger Rabbit.
So I'm hopefully going to make a lot of money with these ideas.
And so what else?
You got to...
Well, can I tell you the real reason I came by tonight?
Sure, yeah.
You all probably can see my hair came in.
Yeah, very nice.
Thank you.
I...
It looks great.
Thanks.
You look like a wrestler, and that's good.
The last time I was here, I was still undergoing the plug session.
Oh, that's right.
I remember.
And I think you might have a...
Yeah, it looked...
Oh, yeah.
Here I am.
Luckily, everything worked out.
You can see it came in great.
Now, how do they do that?
They take the hair from way down on the back of your neck, right?
And then they actually transplant it to the front of your...
Well, you know, that's how they usually do it.
For some reason with me, and I honestly still don't know why, they took the
hair from my
inner thighs and transferred it.
And it actually was very painful, all in all.
But I'm happy with the results, although I won't be wearing any shorts this
summer.
Well, a small price...
For obvious reasons.
Yeah, but certainly a small price to pay for that.
Sure, sure.
I think so.
Yeah.
Let me tell you something.
The reason I'm doing all this, the hair, the eye job...
You had an eye job.
I had an eye job and nose and chin.
And, of course, the chest enhancement is because of something I'm very happy
about.
In a couple of weeks, I'm going to go on the road with the Dirty Dancing Tour.
Oh, boy.
Thank you.
That's great.
Well, thank you.
Paul, thank you.
And I'm pretty happy about it.
Maybe you'd like me to do a little Dirty Dancing for you right now.
Let me tell you something.
As God is my witness, and for the studio audience here and all our home viewers
that are watching,
there is no way, no how, no possibility I am going to get out here and do my Dirty
Dancing
unless you get out here and do a little Dirty Dancing.
I think he's going to do it.
No, no, no.
I'd love to, but I have to make some toast.
So you go ahead and...
I'll do it myself.
Yeah, that's fine.
Now, one thing I do have to ask.
Do I have enough time for...
Al, do we have enough time for Chris to do this for us?
Sure.
Because it's a five-minute routine, and I need it.
I don't want to break up the five-minute routine, so we have enough time.
Yeah, I guess we do.
Okay, good.
Okay, here we go.
If I could have a little music.
It's really almost filthy dancing when you get down to it.
Okay, let's hear the music now.
Dude.
Oh.
I think that's...
Tomorrow on the program, Mark...
Thank you.
Thank you.
Chris Elliott, ladies and gentlemen.
Chris, nice to see you.
Oh, boy.
Well, nice to see you.
I was just downstairs in the drug store.
Well, Chris, seriously, if you're going to wear shirts like that, do some sit-ups.
Right now?
No, no.
Think about it, though.
Listen, I was downstairs.
I was getting some ointment, and I saw your show on the monitor at the Raymart
down there,
and I thought I would...
They have it on the monitor.
They have it on the monitor, and I thought I'd strut my stuff out here and sit
it right
down here.
Great.
Nice to have you here.
Now, I noticed that you're wearing your Roy Clark hat tonight.
Yeah, I am.
I am.
Is there a reason for that?
All right.
Well, I'm sorry you brought that up, but, yeah, there is kind of a reason for
it.
I don't know if any of you have noticed or been watching the show in the last
couple of
weeks, I've been undergoing a hair transplant.
Right.
I think you have a before and after shot.
That's the before.
Uh-huh.
Right.
And there's the after.
Yeah.
And the last time you were here, you looked great.
You had a healthy full...
No, it all worked out well.
Well, I found out that there was actually another after, after that after, and
that's what this
is.
Oh, my God.
That's, uh...
Geez.
What happened exactly?
Well, they were using that thigh hair, and I don't think that that, uh...
It didn't take...
No, the thigh hair didn't take at all.
So, anyway, listen...
It looks like it might be infected back there on the side.
No, it itches.
Yeah.
Oddly enough.
So, how's the big tour going?
You were on a tour last...
You just pulled some out.
Did I get...
Oh.
You know, that happens without me...
Now, don't do that.
Oh, God.
Yeah, I was on the Dirty Dancing Tour, actually.
And, uh...
Well, actually, I'm on a leave of absence.
What happened?
From the Dirty...
It wasn't going too well.
We were down south, and every time I got up there and did a little, you know,
shaking,
the locals threw liquor bottles at me.
Well, that's...
That can be discouraging.
Yeah, so I think if I go back out with them, they