Name: The Logic Joke (CONAN) - Shaggy Dog Jokes with Norm Macdonald
Uploaded: 2019-04-24T21:25:45.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Logic Joke (CONAN) - Shaggy Dog Jokes with Norm Macdonald' from Happy the Dog on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-04-24. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Logic Joke (CONAN) - Shaggy Dog Jokes with Norm Macdonald' from Happy the Dog on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-04-24. Transcript available.

Every day I meet somebody new, you know, this city's great because of the
neighborly people, you know, but I did meet one neighbor, interesting story,
you know, that this guy just moved in, you know, next door to me, so I'm always
one to meet the neighbors.
You like to chat with the neighbors.
Yeah, because, you know, so I went over to the guy, I knocked on the door, next
door to where I live, and I say to the guy, I said, hey, I'm your new neighbor,
you know, and I said, good to see you, you know, nice to run into you, you know,
welcome to the neighborhood, you know, and so the guy, I said, what do you do
for a living there, sir, you know, if you don't mind me asking, you know, what
do you do for a living?
And I'm a, I'm a nightclub comic, I tell the guy, so he says to me, he says, I'm
a, I worked out at the university of science there, he says, I'm a, I'm a, that's
a good school, by the way.
I can't remember the exact place, but he says, I, I'm a professor of logic, so
he says to the guy, he says, logic, now what the hell is that?
I never heard tell of that. He says, oh, well, he says, it's a kind of a
pattern of a syllogistic, well, he says, it's hard to explain, he says, why don't
I give you an example?
So I said, fair enough, why don't you do that? So the guy says, well, he says,
let me ask you a question, he says, do you own a dog house?
So I go, yes, I do. He says, well, then, that means you probably have a dog.
I said, yes. He says, well, that means you're likely you have a family if you
have a dog.
I said, yes, I do. He said, well, then that means you got kids, you're married.
I said, yes, yes, I am. He says, well, then you're a heterosexual man.
I said, yes, sir, I am. He says, well, you see, that's logic there.
I asked if simply from finding out you had a dog house, I made this series of
inferences and I found that you're a heterosexual man simply from the fact that
you had a dog house.
Well, I said, good God, isn't that something?
Okay.
So I said, well, I won't waste any more of your time there, neighbor.
And I said, I'll see you. See you later.
See you around. Okay.
So I went, I said, come on, come by one day and have a chicken with me.
So anyways, I left.
So I left.
So I go, I go to get a bus, you know, to the bus stop.
And I, I, I walked down to the bus stop and I still thinking about this thing
that happened to me, you know, and I'm standing at the bus and, uh, uh, no bus
coming at all, you know, five or six of us standing around.
And, uh, one guy lights up a cigarette there and he goes, he goes, as soon as
you light up a cigarette, the bus comes and, uh, he smokes the whole damn
cigarette.
No bus comes.
So, uh, I said to the guy, well, that theory really worked, huh?
And the guy goes, well, sometimes it works.
Anyways, the guy goes, uh, what's new with you?
I go, well, I, uh, had an interesting thing happen to me today.
I said, I met my neighbor.
Mm-hmm.
And he goes, oh, yeah.
I go, he had a hell of an interesting job.
I said, he's a professor of logic down at the University of Science.
And, uh, so the guy says, is that so?
He says, uh, professor of logic.
He goes, what the hell is that?
Logic.
Mm-hmm.
I said, well, it's a series of Cicilla something or other.
Right, right.
I said, I can't remember exactly, but I said, uh, I'll give you an example if
you want to hear an example.
Yeah.
So the guy goes, all right, fair enough.
So I said, uh, let me ask you this.
I said, uh, uh, uh, do you, let me ask you a question.
Do you own a dog house?
And the guy goes, uh, no, I don't own a dog house.
So, uh, I says, the guy says, oh, yeah, you're one of them gays.
And he will work, right?
Yeah, right.
A lot of great stuff you can learn at that University of Science there.
And then, and then the guy, and then get this, look at this.
There's more.
This gay guy.
Yeah.
Invites me to have a chicken at his fridge.
That's some kind of euphemism.
Watch out.