Name: Norm Macdonald on The Woody Show (2008 & 2009) Compilation Radio Interviews
Uploaded: 2019-07-18T22:01:31.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Norm Macdonald on The Woody Show (2008 & 2009) Compilation Radio Interviews' from Happy the Dog on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-07-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Norm Macdonald on The Woody Show (2008 & 2009) Compilation Radio Interviews' from Happy the Dog on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-07-18. Transcript available.

Norm Macdonald on The Woody Show (2008 & 2009) Compilation Radio Interviews

Live on 05, the Woody Show podcast broadcast.
Well, Norm MacDonald's here.
It's the San Jose Improv.
Steve, you're the feature act, right?
Okay, nice to meet you, by the way.
I wasn't trying to be a jerk.
I'm just like, I don't know you.
Who are you?
We haven't met before.
I can't blame you for not knowing me.
It's my fault.
I've got to get better known.
No, I just, you know, I'm like, okay.
I'm just saying hi.
Where's my microphone?
There's a guy coming.
No, don't worry.
No, you'll laugh, man.
Listen to this.
Yeah, let's hear a good one.
He was in his hotel room today.
No, the maid, I was completely naked, and the maid walks in.
All right.
Finally.
Okay.
Well, that was it.
Get it?
Everybody?
Oh, my God.
He tried again.
He was waiting for the maid.
He tried again.
He was waiting.
You have to say you were waiting for the maid.
Well, I know, but it was, I had to jump in.
I don't know.
It's really funny.
I panicked.
Like, one thing we love about Norm MacDonald's,
Norm will come in, and he has, like, this long setup to a joke, right?
Yeah, and then there's no punchline?
It's the quickest punchline.
I like the joke you told last time about Johnny Carson and the heart attack.
Oh, you remember that?
Yeah.
See, we pay attention.
I listened to that, dude, and it still, like, makes me crack up.
He doesn't remember.
I remember it was Johnny Carson phoning the 911.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Tell Stevie.
He'll love it.
I didn't hear it.
Remember he had a heart attack?
Yeah, yeah.
So it was, like, the heart attack, and then the 911 call, it's like,
Johnny Carson telling the 911 person, I feel like there's a yak on my chest.
Was that it?
That was it.
That was it.
That worked better than Stevie's time.
That's funny.
Why am I getting big laughs and Stevie gets dead silent?
You know what?
Because maybe we were prepared.
I was prepared for a longer joke.
Like, see, we're familiar with your comedy.
Like, you know, nice, you know.
We know we have to be focused right now.
Can you get one more chance?
Right, yeah, sure, yeah.
Okay, go ahead.
I'm focused.
All right, well, all right.
I did construction work, and I got hurt on the job.
Yeah.
I mean, it's just like...
You coughed at me.
I'm sorry.
No, no.
Go ahead, man.
All right.
You do construction work.
You got hurt on the job.
You got hurt on the job.
No, it was just my feelings, but the point is...
Okay.
See, that's like the part...
See, you could write for Jay Leno, because Jay does the whole thing.
Oh, my God.
No, because Jay does the whole thing where he'll come out and it's like...
How many more arrows do you want to slip into this guy?
What are you talking about?
I need to lie down.
Oh, yeah.
Because Jay is so unsuccessful.
Yeah, he's really unsuccessful.
Yeah, he's really unsuccessful.
People hate Jay Leno.
Steve, you should lie down, because God forbid you should be as successful as
Jay Leno.
Yeah, right for the Tonight Show.
Wow, what an arrow rave.
Yeah, what terrible is that, Steve?
No, okay, but...
I'm going to be on Leno, by the way, in two weeks.
I'm going to tell him.
I'm going to tell him what he said.
And what an arrow it is.
Yeah.
No, because Jay will be like, so I was hanging out and this chick comes up to
me and she says...
And he tells the punchline, whatever it is, like, I was like, oh, okay.
And then he starts telling, like, the next line of the story, even though there
is no next line.
He's like, why did the chicken cross the road?
Look at the other side.
Yeah, because, you know, I got that road.
You crazy, Jay.
You crazy, Jay.
You crazy, Jay.
Yeah.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Steve went on The Tonight Show and they gave him rim shots.
I think he's the only comedian ever.
Remember that, Steve?
Yeah, it was early on when Jay took over.
Yeah.
I guess they do it for Jay, so they did it in the middle of my act.
And I sort of pretended that I thought it was okay, so they kept doing it.
Right.
I felt like Henny Youngman after a while.
All your jokes seem so lame.
But maybe they were lame.
I don't know.
From what we've seen this morning.
No, I don't think that.
No, it's funny.
No, I think it's funny, man.
I don't.
Oh, thanks.
In lieu of laughter.
In lieu of laughter, a compliment.
The other thing I like about Norm is just how he cracks himself up.
That's the best.
Because it's like Greg.
Greg hears stuff in his head.
Right.
And just starts laughing.
And just starts laughing.
He hasn't even told the joke yet.
It's like he's already there.
But Norm MacDonald, The San Jose Improv.
Tonight, 8 o'clock.
Tomorrow, 8 and 10.
Saturday, 7 to 9.
Sunday, 7 p.m.
Improv.com.
Or call 408-280-7475.
So what else have you been up to, man?
You just been, like, torn around doing comedy?
Yeah, we're doing a lot of stand-up.
Steve and I are going on the road.
Yeah.
And that's working out.
Yeah.
And then you've been on Dennis Miller's break.
You're laughing.
You're making me laugh.
Yeah.
Dude, laughter's contagious.
And then you were, like, laughing.
I did not look at Steve and start laughing.
I was laughing because you're laughing.
I don't know about that.
I'm not making that up.
Laughter, smile.
What's your favorite Steve joke?
The one about the maid that comes into the hotel room and he was naked.
You know, waiting for her.
Because he was waiting for her.
And he said, finally.
That's his favorite one.
That was the one that was met with, like, complete.
There it is.
Well, you know, come on.
Make you comfortable.
No, no, he's got it.
Give him one more chance.
Give him another chance.
All right, come on.
I think quit while I'm behind.
No, dude, Steve, it's not that bad.
Why don't you, Joe, let me see.
Dude, you could have a giant rally like the stock market.
Yeah, come on.
Just rally.
Bring it back.
See, we put him on the spot.
That's not fair.
Dude, raise your hand when you have one.
Just be like I'm ready.
I would assume he has an act of some kind.
Am I wrong?
Well, women are getting so sensitive these days.
You know, a woman was a yelling man.
You know, why is it always the woman who has to get the coffee?
And I said, well, you're the waitress.
That's what I'm saying.
That was a zinger.
Oh, my goodness.
The rimshot makes every joke feel kind of corny, you know.
Not that I didn't deliver it kind of corny, but I mean.
No, but he's not doing the rimshot.
He's doing the rimshot after he hears the joke.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
All right, here.
Try another one.
Do it without the rimshot.
No rimshot.
I promise no rimshot this time.
Wait, wait, I can't.
Let me think.
Give me a second.
I'll give you a second.
Norm, are you going to do any more movies?
People are texting in.
They're asking that question.
A lot of that.
Yeah, I'm going to do a movie.
Yeah.
You don't know what it is yet, but you're going to do one, right?
No, I am doing a movie, actually.
And people want to know if you're high.
Because they say every time they hear you, you always seem like you're just so
happy and
in a really good place.
Yeah, I've never.
I don't know.
You've got the giggles going on and stuff.
I don't get high.
No?
But when you're happy, people think you're high or drunk.
It's high on life.
That's true.
I've been all this happy in my life.
Are you going to reprise your role as Chubby Jr.?
Little Chubby?
That was on My Name is Earl.
It was cool because Burt Reynolds was on the show, and I love Burt Reynolds.
He's Big Chubby.
Yeah.
You know that show?
Do you know the show?
I love that show.
It's one of my favorites.
He loves it.
Yeah.
I really liked Jason Lee when I met him.
He was a cool dude.
Yeah, I ran into Jamie Presley in L.A.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah, she was sitting at the table next to us, and my buddy who talks to
anybody, he's
that guy, just starts this conversation because he'd seen her hosting some kind
of event
the night before, so he had an in with the conversation.
So they start to, she was so nice.
She can't quit smoking.
She's got a problem with the smoking.
Yeah.
Unless she's pregnant.
Yeah, but she smokes a Winston.
Oh, wait.
He's got one.
Stevie's ready.
All right.
Here we go.
Wait, what?
Oh, they're pregnant?
You just said you got one.
No, I didn't.
And I promise no rim shot this time.
No rim shot.
No rim shot.
Jesus.
I can't.
I don't know.
Like, I don't do joke jokes.
All right.
That's it?
That's what you said?
Well, it's just that you can't just, when you say, do a joke.
You stopped the conversation.
You're a comedian.
You stopped the conversation and gave me a joke.
I believe I did not stop the conversation.
That's not, it shouldn't be that big a challenge.
I mean, like, somebody says to a comedian, like, tell a joke.
That's, you know.
Hey, man, it's like, all right.
Come on, man.
No, you ever.
You can do it, Stevie.
All right.
Well, it's a, you ever call a company for phone help and they can't help them?
They say, is there anything else I can help you with?
I said no rim shot.
No rim shot.
Now I'm just doing it to be funny.
No.
You got to be careful, ask it, because from what I hear from the movies, all
comedians
will go into, well, a family goes into a talent agency and they say, we've got
this great
act.
This guy, they came to me to do that movie.
He's talking about the aristocrat.
Yeah.
Right.
And I said, I've never heard that joke.
But they have secret parties at Chevy Chase's house.
It's the gayest thing I've ever heard.
I'm like, you're going to make us all sound like, that's so gay that we all go
backstage
and go, hey, well, let's hear your version.
That doesn't happen.
That's not true.
That might have happened back in the 30s or something, but did you ever hear
that?
No.
No.
That's the weirdest movie ever.
I was so angry about that thing.
All right.
We've got to go.
Stevie can't wait to get to LeMontanelli.
By we, he means him and the mouse in his pocket.
Right.
You've got a mouse in your pocket.
Oh, man.
Come on.
You got the record?
You don't get it?
Is that a good joke?
I thought you were a comedian.
Tip your waitresses.
We've got to go.
We've got to.
No, come on.
No, I can't.
What?
Just one more.
I can't do any more.
I can't take any more.
I can't take any more.
Are you really getting that upset?
No.
Are you upset?
No, I'm fine.
I'm fine.
I just have to.
Can you do one more?
But it won't be funny.
It'll be funny.
And then it'll be one last thing.
It wasn't fun.
Do you want to hear one more?
I want to hear one more, please.
I'll play some cake, Frank Sinatra, for you.
I can't even think of any of my.
I can't think of a one.
Oh, come on.
All right.
I'll do an impression.
I'll do an impression.
All right.
Here we go.
Okay.
This is what?
I thought you were going to do that one where you couldn't do his voice.
Oh, theme is out.
Theme is tapped out.
Listen live weekday mornings, 6 to 10.
The Bay Area is one and only.
Live 105.
Live 105.
The Woody Show.
The big question I have for Norm MacDonald.
Is he here?
Come on in.
Big question I have for him.
Did he bring Steve?
I hope he did.
His buddy Steve.
His sidekick Steve.
I mean, did we do the writer okay?
Maybe, you know.
Because Steve hates us.
Did we scare Steve away, maybe?
I think we probably did.
Here comes Norm.
Hey, what's up, Norm?
How you doing, man?
Wow.
Yeah.
It's been too long.
It has.
Where's Steve?
Oh, man.
Steve hates us, doesn't he?
Steve McDonald?
No, Steve's not here, but I brought Brian, but they wouldn't let him in.
He's even funnier than Steve.
Why?
Bring Brian in.
He's funnier than Steve?
No way.
No way.
I don't believe it.
I don't think Brian can get to that level.
Hey, Brian.
It's all that, man.
He even looks different than Steve.
A little bit more hair.
Yeah.
No glasses.
Yeah.
He's got a good joke, man.
He's got a lot of men.
Yeah, it's still a joke.
Yeah.
Let's hear something.
You were telling me about the guy that had the great pig?
Oh, you told me that joke.
No, you told me that joke.
There's the mic.
There's the mic.
Do it into the mic.
Come on, man.
Mike.
Come on, man.
Come on, dude.
Sell some tickets, Brian.
Brian.
Brian.
Brian.
Brian.
Brian.
Come on, Brian.
If you want to hear the joke, the best