Name: Bill Burr - Should We Even Continue Using Social Media?
Uploaded: 2020-10-31T15:01:37.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Should We Even Continue Using Social Media?' from Comedy University on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-10-31. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - Should We Even Continue Using Social Media?' from Comedy University on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-10-31. Transcript available.

The topic I believe today is social media and does it need to be done away with?
Which I never thought it was okay to begin with, but I always...
What are you talking about, Joe? You jumped on it like a fucking horse in a
stiff car.
You were all over it.
Facebook, Friendster, Trickster, whatever the fuck they had.
I was never on Friendster.
You were on Trickster. You left Twitter.
That was a man horse site, Joe.
I will middle at your club and blow the manager.
I remember that. That's how you started building your following.
When did you leave Twitter, Joe?
I left Twitter about a month ago when it was right after the James...
Talk about an Irish goodbye.
No one's even known you left, you bum.
Yeah, I know. Nobody cares.
But does anybody care?
Hey, stop the presses. Joe DeRosa left Twitter.
Did the stock plummet that day, Joe?
This is when I left.
It was after James Gunn got in trouble for the old tweets.
And I was like, that's fucked up.
And then all my friends were deleting tweets because they were scared that
people were going to go through their shit.
And then I saw a story on movieweb.com and it said,
Ryan Johnson, Star Wars director, deleted 20,000 tweets last night.
What's that all about?
And I sent a text to my buddy and I go, they're now clocking people that are
deleting.
They're now looking at people deleting and wondering why they're...
I'm like, I'm fucking done with this.
I just want to know...
I want to know, who are the people that are just out there trying to get people
in trouble?
Like, the way that you were fucking raised.
You know what I mean?
That you just sit there running around telling on people, even when there's
nothing there.
I know.
See if there was literally something there.
It's so pathetic.
But now they're just trying to get people in trouble.
Like, he said this, but didn't he mean that?
Well, it's fringe.
It's the fringe.
It's the extreme left and the extreme right.
And this is how they're fighting right now.
No, I have a friend who's really amazing on Twitter.
She's like a great Twitter person.
And she actively goes back and deletes old tweets.
And I was like, why do you do that?
And she's like, because I don't need people digging around,
trying to, like, pull things out of context and make things what they're not.
So she's like, I go back and I delete all the time.
So she's like, it's just like a self-preservation.
She's like, it's annoying, but it's like a self-preservation thing.
There's no sense of humor with any.
Like, when there was that big argument, when everybody got mad at Eliza Schlesinger
for saying female comics should stop talking so much about their vaginas,
I went on and I meant it as a joke.
I go, I hate female comics, but I love their pussies.
I don't know where I stand in this argument.
And then I deleted it.
And female comics that I liked retweeted it.
They thought it was funny, but I deleted it.
I was like, I don't need somebody going back and one day trying to use this
against me.
They absolutely would.
Yeah.
So the thing is, as annoying as it is, it was probably, I mean, you've talked
about it.
So it's like now it's out there forever.
I honestly never think about any of that shit.
I don't remember anything that you didn't know.
I don't remember anything that I've tweeted.
Perhaps you see, but I don't think you tweet anything that, I don't know.
Perhaps you need to go back through your archives.
Do I need to get more edgy on Twitter?
So I need to leave it.
I have to leave it a couple of things just because I just think about it.
I'm just like, you know what?
Let me just, but the topic at hand today is the question of why social media is
it bad
or is it good?
Is it, I'm at a point where I go, we clearly can't handle this responsibility.
People just can't handle it.
It's, we don't use, don't let me in with these animals.
I'm handling it perfectly.
I fucking hype my shit.
I go on there.
I try to make people laugh, remind them that I am in the world and hopefully
they'll come
out to my show, but I don't fucking go around trying to get people in trouble.
Uh, I don't, I don't jump on hashtags like things I don't tolerate all of those
fucking
douchebags.
I don't do any of that.
You don't find it hard though.
When somebody really comes at you with some flippant comment to, I mean, I know
you don't
respond, but you don't have to kind of fight that and go, no, I laugh.
I think they're funny.
Cause I always just know where it's coming from.
Where do you think it's coming from?
A studio apartment, a fucking bad relationship.
They don't even fucking know who I am.
Right.
Okay.
Yeah.
The problem is, is that these fucking corporations can't let one nickel roll
out the door.
So if anybody gets anybody to raise their fucking eyebrows up, these fucking
corporate cunts
act like the sky's falling and the, and that's, what's giving it power.
If they just fucking blew it off and then all these nerds, you know, they go
after the,
if you do that, I'm not going to buy any products on the show.
I'm going to get rid of Netflix.
No, you're not.
Right.
Right.
Netflix is TV at this point.
Right.
What are you going to do?
Start reading.
Right.
We all know that.
Yeah.
That ain't happening.
Libraries are fucking closing down like, like, like post offices.
Right.
Well, there's only like, do you know, there's less than 80 post offices left in
the country
right now or in the state of California.
I'm sorry.
There's 80.
Is that low?
In the entire state of California.
In the entire state.
There's 80.
80.
Are you sure about that?
No.
That seems like a lot.
Joe, how dumb are you?
That seems so little.
What are you talking about?
Joe, there's probably fucking 80 between you.
Yeah, no, no, no.
In LA.
Yeah, no.
That would be too little.
There's 6 million people here, dude.
I don't think, I don't, just to get back to what we're talking about.
I don't think that social media is evil, but I think that people are evil.
And so the wrong people get a hold of social media, they abuse it.
But I don't think that social media is the problem.
I think the problem is just human nature.
When I would, look, years ago, not years ago, three years ago, whatever it was,
I would
make these same complaints about.
Joe, just be honest.
It never happened.
No, but about three years ago, I'd make these same type of complaints about
Twitter, whatever,
and people would say, no, it's actually an amazing tool.
Look what happened in Egypt.
They were able to rebel because the people came together on there, whatever.
And I'm like, yeah, but for the United States, this isn't Egypt.
And I don't think people are using it the right way here.
And I think the, it's, it's not about the right people.
It's about the average person.
And the average person wants to sit in front of, you know, I was watching CNN
the other
day.
They had Kellyanne Conway on Cuomo, like debating for half an hour.
It was a full 30 minute uncut conversation.
And he's going, he's going to her, he's going, just admit that the president
lied.
You know, he's screaming that at her.
And she's going, he didn't lie.
He didn't lie.
You know?
And I'm like, what fucking idiot watches this and actually thinks she's going
to go, he
lied.
You got me.
Right.
She can't do that.
It's her goddamn job.
Okay.
And who thinks that?
And on the other side of it, what fucking idiot thinks this guy's going to go,
you know,
Kelly, I kind of see where you're coming from.
Right.
Exactly.
It's all such a fucking dog and pony show.
And the people that love Twitter and going crazy on it and all that shit and
whatever
it is, those are the same people that watch that shit and really think like,
look at this,
this, the argument.
It's like, this is a fucking TV show.
Isn't it pony and dog show?
No.
Dog and pony.
Bill, are you going to take this seriously?
It's a pony and dog show.
Dog and pony show.
Dog and pony.
I don't think you're right.
I've always said this, this pony and dog show.
Dog and pony show.
Dog and pony.
No, I go on to where.
If you went to an animal show, what's the headliner?
The dog or the pony?
The pony, Bill.
The pony is.
Dog and pony.
Pony and dog.
They don't go Joe DeRosa and Frank Sinatra.
They say Frank Sinatra with Joe DeRosa.
It's a pony and dog show.
I'll tell you, I can't tell many times I've walked out of one of your shows
after opening
for you and people from the audience will say, as far as I'm concerned, this
was Joe DeRosa
and Bill Burr tonight.
You know, Joe, I came on here to have a good time.
Not to be hurt.
Not to be attacked.
Not to be hurt.
By some emotional comedian.
I go to Twitter because there's a lot of stuff on Twitter that makes me laugh.
And a lot of like, there's a woman that I-
What makes you laugh, Nia?
Well, there's a woman that I follow on Twitter.
She's great.
Her name is Naima.
And she does these things called music sermons.
And she does these threads every Sunday about a different topic of music.
And she goes all into like, the history of stuff.
And she's got clips and stuff.
It's like a channel.
So I love Twitter for stuff like that.
And I do like the funny memes and like, silly videos and stuff like that.
So, but otherwise, I try not to get to-
There's certain stuff that I might be strongly about that I'll tweet.
How hard is it for you, Nia, to not get sucked into Twitter?
For you as a person on Twitter-
How hard is it for you not to interrupt me when I'm having a train of thought?
Is this how this podcast is going to go?
Absolutely.
Because if it is, let me tell you, I'm out of here.
Why don't you do the Irish goodbye?
You should just get up and just fucking walk right out of the fucking-
Out of the thing.
What is your question?
Uh-huh?
What is your question?
I just, you know, when it just starts getting too seriously, I'm just going to
be the cunt on the show.
No, don't do that.
I will do whatever the fuck I want to do.
Wait, whose podcast is this?
Isn't this a three-person podcast?
Or is this like some sort of dictatorship?
See what happens?
One episode back, and all of a sudden, she's fucking talking socialism.
We used to discuss this stuff seriously.
Like, we would have real discussions about it.
Joe, I just remember screaming and yelling at each other.
That's what I remember the show was.
We would talk, like-
Are you going to sit here and act like we have intelligent listeners?
Oh, why are you going to turn on the audience now?
That's not necessary.
Well, if you take it fucking seriously, yeah, it becomes a thing.
What do you guys-
Why don't you have-
Do I have to delete that comment?
Yes, you do.
Go back and delete that so you don't offend me.
I don't give a shit about social media.
I don't give a shit about social justice people.
I don't give a shit about the-
It's this stupid hysteria.
Like, all of the-
Everything that's going on right now, all of this heightened fucking horse shit,
you know,
no one's mad about what I think they should really be-
And who are you?
They should really be-
And who are you, Buddha on a mountain?
Like, you get to decide what people should be-
I'm Buddha in a leather chair.
But she-
Oh, I don't give a shit about people who are concerned about this.
It's like, who are you?
Like, well, what do you care about?
Who are they?
What's important to you?
Yeah, who are they?
Well, but you're the one with the microphone and the access to all these people-
Well, they're the one on Twitter, destroying people's fucking careers.
Ah, so now we're really getting into it.
So what is it about it that you feel-
Getting into what?
I was trying to say what I felt, and then you just-
You said, who the fuck are you?
Yeah, I did.
And I still haven't gotten an answer that satisfies me.
I'm nobody.
I'm another fucking asshole with an opinion.
That's right.
That's right.
But this is your opinion.
This is what I want to hear.
I want to hear what you think about this shit.
This is what blows my fucking mind.
Please, there you go.
That we bankrupted this country, fighting 3,500 jerk-offs on a jungle gym that
don't have
a fucking plane or a fucking boat.
And meanwhile, because we're fighting terrorism, when we look the other way,
when one corporation
essentially poisoned our fucking food supply, and nobody did anything about it.
And now we're trying to force the rest of the world to fucking eat it so they
can become
sick, fat cunts like us.
Right.
And none of that fucking matters.
But if you told a fucking tweet in 2011, wrote a tweet, whatever the fuck it is,
sent
a tweet, all of a sudden people are more concerned about just watching somebody
out.
He had a dream.
Let me fucking end this while I eat another thing, another pig that was fed a
pig.

Bill Burr - Should We Even Continue Using Social Media?

The topic I believe today is social media and does it need to be done away with?
Which I never thought it was okay to begin with, but I always...
What are you talking about, Joe? You jumped on it like a fucking horse in a
stiff car.
You were all over it.
Facebook, Friendster, Trickster, whatever the fuck they had.
I was never on Friendster.
You were on Trickster. You left Twitter.
That was a man horse site, Joe.
I will middle at your club and blow the manager.
I remember that. That's how you started building your following.
When did you leave Twitter, Joe?
I left Twitter about a month ago when it was right after the James...
Talk about an Irish goodbye.
No one's even known you left, you bum.
Yeah, I know. Nobody cares.
But does anybody care?
Hey, stop the presses. Joe DeRosa left Twitter.
Did the stock plummet that day, Joe?
This is when I left.
It was after James Gunn got in trouble for the old tweets.
And I was like, that's fucked up.
And then all my friends were deleting tweets because they were scared that
people were going to go through their shit.
And then I saw a story on movieweb.com and it said,
Ryan Johnson, Star Wars director, deleted 20,000 tweets last night.
What's that all about?
And I sent a text to my buddy and I go, they're now clocking people that are
deleting.
They're now looking at people deleting and wondering why they're...
I'm like, I'm fucking done with this.
I just want to know...
I want to know, who are the people that are just out there trying to get people
in trouble?
Like, the way that you were fucking raised.
You know what I mean?
That you just sit there running around telling on people, even when there's
nothing there.
I know.
See if there was literally something there.
It's so pathetic.
But now they're just trying to get people in trouble.
Like, he said this, but didn't he mean that?
Well, it's fringe.
It's the fringe.
It's the extreme left and the extreme right.
And this is how they're fighting right now.
No, I have a friend who's really amazing on Twitter.
She's like a great Twitter person.
And she actively goes back and deletes old tweets.
And I was like, why do you do that?
And she's like, because I don't need people digging around,
trying to, like, pull things out of context and make things what they're not.
So she's like, I go back and I delete all the time.
So she's like, it's just like a self-preservation.
She's like, it's annoying, but it's like a self-preservation thing.
There's no sense of humor with any.
Like, when there was that big argument, when everybody got mad at Eliza Schlesinger
for saying female comics should stop talking so much about their vaginas,
I went on and I meant it as a joke.
I go, I hate female comics, but I love their pussies.
I don't know where I stand in this argument.
And then I deleted it.
And female comics that I liked retweeted it.
They thought it was funny, but I deleted it.
I was like, I don't need somebody going back and one day trying to use this
against me.
They absolutely would.
Yeah.
So the thing is, as annoying as it is, it was probably, I mean, you've talked
about it.
So it's like now it's out there forever.
I honestly never think about any of that shit.
I don't remember anything that you didn't know.
I don't remember anything that I've tweeted.
Perhaps you see, but I don't think you tweet anything that, I don't know.
Perhaps you need to go back through your archives.
Do I need to get more edgy on Twitter?
So I need to leave it.
I have to leave it a couple of things just because I just think about it.
I'm just like, you know what?
Let me just, but the topic at hand today is the question of why social media is
it bad
or is it good?
Is it, I'm at a point where I go, we clearly can't handle this responsibility.
People just can't handle it.
It's, we don't use, don't let me in with these animals.
I'm handling it perfectly.
I fucking hype my shit.
I go on there.
I try to make people laugh, remind them that I am in the world and hopefully
they'll come
out to my show, but I don't fucking go around trying to get people in trouble.
Uh, I don't, I don't jump on hashtags like things I don't tolerate all of those
fucking
douchebags.
I don't do any of that.
You don't find it hard though.
When somebody really comes at you with some flippant comment to, I mean, I know
you don't
respond, but you don't have to kind of fight that and go, no, I laugh.
I think they're funny.
Cause I always just know where it's coming from.
Where do you think it's coming from?
A studio apartment, a fucking bad relationship.
They don't even fucking know who I am.
Right.
Okay.
Yeah.
The problem is, is that these fucking corporations can't let one nickel roll
out the door.
So if anybody gets anybody to raise their fucking eyebrows up, these fucking
corporate cunts
act like the sky's falling and the, and that's, what's giving it power.
If they just fucking blew it off and then all these nerds, you know, they go
after the,
if you do that, I'm not going to buy any products on the show.
I'm going to get rid of Netflix.
No, you're not.
Right.
Right.
Netflix is TV at this point.
Right.
What are you going to do?
Start reading.
Right.
We all know that.
Yeah.
That ain't happening.
Libraries are fucking closing down like, like, like post offices.
Right.
Well, there's only like, do you know, there's less than 80 post offices left in
the country
right now or in the state of California.
I'm sorry.
There's 80.
Is that low?
In the entire state of California.
In the entire state.
There's 80.
80.
Are you sure about that?
No.
That seems like a lot.
Joe, how dumb are you?
That seems so little.
What are you talking about?
Joe, there's probably fucking 80 between you.
Yeah, no, no, no.
In LA.
Yeah, no.
That would be too little.
There's 6 million people here, dude.
I don't think, I don't, just to get back to what we're talking about.
I don't think that social media is evil, but I think that people are evil.
And so the wrong people get a hold of social media, they abuse it.
But I don't think that social media is the problem.
I think the problem is just human nature.
When I would, look, years ago, not years ago, three years ago, whatever it was,
I would
make these same complaints about.
Joe, just be honest.
It never happened.
No, but about three years ago, I'd make these same type of complaints about
Twitter, whatever,
and people would say, no, it's actually an amazing tool.
Look what happened in Egypt.
They were able to rebel because the people came together on there, whatever.
And I'm like, yeah, but for the United States, this isn't Egypt.
And I don't think people are using it the right way here.
And I think the, it's, it's not about the right people.
It's about the average person.
And the average person wants to sit in front of, you know, I was watching CNN
the other
day.
They had Kellyanne Conway on Cuomo, like debating for half an hour.
It was a full 30 minute uncut conversation.
And he's going, he's going to her, he's going, just admit that the president
lied.
You know, he's screaming that at her.
And she's going, he didn't lie.
He didn't lie.
You know?
And I'm like, what fucking idiot watches this and actually thinks she's going
to go, he
lied.
You got me.
Right.
She can't do that.
It's her goddamn job.
Okay.
And who thinks that?
And on the other side of it, what fucking idiot thinks this guy's going to go,
you know,
Kelly, I kind of see where you're coming from.
Right.
Exactly.
It's all such a fucking dog and pony show.
And the people that love Twitter and going crazy on it and all that shit and
whatever
it is, those are the same people that watch that shit and really think like,
look at this,
this, the argument.
It's like, this is a fucking TV show.
Isn't it pony and dog show?
No.
Dog and pony.
Bill, are you going to take this seriously?
It's a pony and dog show.
Dog and pony show.
Dog and pony.
I don't think you're right.
I've always said this, this pony and dog show.
Dog and pony show.
Dog and pony.
No, I go on to where.
If you went to an animal show, what's the headliner?
The dog or the pony?
The pony, Bill.
The pony is.
Dog and pony.
Pony and dog.
They don't go Joe DeRosa and Frank Sinatra.
They say Frank Sinatra with Joe DeRosa.
It's a pony and dog show.
I'll tell you, I can't tell many times I've walked out of one of your shows
after opening
for you and people from the audience will say, as far as I'm concerned, this
was Joe DeRosa
and Bill Burr tonight.
You know, Joe, I came on here to have a good time.
Not to be hurt.
Not to be attacked.
Not to be hurt.
By some emotional comedian.
I go to Twitter because there's a lot of stuff on Twitter that makes me laugh.
And a lot of like, there's a woman that I-
What makes you laugh, Nia?
Well, there's a woman that I follow on Twitter.
She's great.
Her name is Naima.
And she does these things called music sermons.
And she does these threads every Sunday about a different topic of music.
And she goes all into like, the history of stuff.
And she's got clips and stuff.
It's like a channel.
So I love Twitter for stuff like that.
And I do like the funny memes and like, silly videos and stuff like that.
So, but otherwise, I try not to get to-
There's certain stuff that I might be strongly about that I'll tweet.
How hard is it for you, Nia, to not get sucked into Twitter?
For you as a person on Twitter-
How hard is it for you not to interrupt me when I'm having a train of thought?
Is this how this podcast is going to go?
Absolutely.
Because if it is, let me tell you, I'm out of here.
Why don't you do the Irish goodbye?
You should just get up and just fucking walk right out of the fucking-
Out of the thing.
What is your question?
Uh-huh?
What is your question?
I just, you know, when it just starts getting too seriously, I'm just going to
be the cunt on the show.
No, don't do that.
I will do whatever the fuck I want to do.
Wait, whose podcast is this?
Isn't this a three-person podcast?
Or is this like some sort of dictatorship?
See what happens?
One episode back, and all of a sudden, she's fucking talking socialism.
We used to discuss this stuff seriously.
Like, we would have real discussions about it.
Joe, I just remember screaming and yelling at each other.
That's what I remember the show was.
We would talk, like-
Are you going to sit here and act like we have intelligent listeners?
Oh, why are you going to turn on the audience now?
That's not necessary.
Well, if you take it fucking seriously, yeah, it becomes a thing.
What do you guys-
Why don't you have-
Do I have to delete that comment?
Yes, you do.
Go back and delete that so you don't offend me.
I don't give a shit about social media.
I don't give a shit about social justice people.
I don't give a shit about the-
It's this stupid hysteria.
Like, all of the-
Everything that's going on right now, all of this heightened fucking horse shit,
you know,
no one's mad about what I think they should really be-
And who are you?
They should really be-
And who are you, Buddha on a mountain?
Like, you get to decide what people should be-
I'm Buddha in a leather chair.
But she-
Oh, I don't give a shit about people who are concerned about this.
It's like, who are you?
Like, well, what do you care about?
Who are they?
What's important to you?
Yeah, who are they?
Well, but you're the one with the microphone and the access to all these people-
Well, they're the one on Twitter, destroying people's fucking careers.
Ah, so now we're really getting into it.
So what is it about it that you feel-
Getting into what?
I was trying to say what I felt, and then you just-
You said, who the fuck are you?
Yeah, I did.
And I still haven't gotten an answer that satisfies me.
I'm nobody.
I'm another fucking asshole with an opinion.
That's right.
That's right.
But this is your opinion.
This is what I want to hear.
I want to hear what you think about this shit.
This is what blows my fucking mind.
Please, there you go.
That we bankrupted this country, fighting 3,500 jerk-offs on a jungle gym