Name: Scars From The Boston Roast Culture - Bill Burr & Ricky Gervais
Uploaded: 2025-08-31T16:18:46.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Scars From The Boston Roast Culture - Bill Burr & Ricky Gervais' from Comedy University on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-08-31. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Scars From The Boston Roast Culture - Bill Burr & Ricky Gervais' from Comedy University on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-08-31. Transcript available.

but what was the what was the accusation what was the stick you were giving him
for doing
a corporate sd at the cellar said hey there's some atlanta braves coming up
they were playing
the yankees in the world series they they're taking a bus from their hotel to
yankee stadium
they want somebody to stand up on the bus and we'll give you a world series
ticket and i'm like
yeah it's the easiest gig ever all i gotta do is get on the yankees i could do
that for four
hours no problem right and my buddy did he said it was easy it kind of sucked a
little bit then i got
my ticket and i took off so she they offered it to me and jim norton and jim's
like yeah i don't know
and i was like ah you know i don't know either so then like two days later i
didn't realize jim said
no to it and i started trashing jim and i was getting him so he can pan and he
goes whatever
bus boy and then the whole table stopped and said what he goes bill burr's
gonna do stand up on a
bus for a world series ticket i'm like he got offered it too and it was just it
was over
it was f***ing over it was like i got caught wearing a wire in a mob meeting
it was f***ing they just ripped my shirt open
i almost cried one time i got so hurt by my pounding i was with keith robinson
and patrice in
amsterdam i had bought this outfit for the big show a black shirt polyester
shirt but i bought
there was a time believe it or not what polyester pants were in so i bought
these black pants
what i didn't know is i bought bell bottom i didn't know they were bell bottom
so when i came out it
looked like i was wearing an evening gown i just remember i walked out i didn't
understand and i
walked out and patrice keith were in the van with the windows up but you just
heard patrice's
they smashed me the guy the guy driving who booked the thing it was just
miserable he was laughing so
hard he had to pull the van over oh no that and they were just smashing me and
i just had my head
because i had to perform in this i had no i had to go on stage with this outfit
you were dressed like
cat woman this is like trauma this is like trauma i i was just i was taking it
but i wanted to like
just cry a little bit you know what's funny when you say that that's trauma is
there's a lot of truth
to that because like those are the funniest guys i ever hung out with and
rather than sitting down
and writing a script and shooting something for like five years all we did was
try to sabotage each
other every possible thing but there would be times i would i like i really
wanted to try something out
i would i just didn't have it in me that night i had a tough day i would skip
going upstairs
i would wait till right before my spot i'd catch the host out on the sidewalk
and i would go downstairs
and then i would go on stage knowing full well that i was i got a good four
minutes before they
see me on that tv and then they're all going to stand in the doorway mean mugging
me shaking their
head at everything i say like it's not funny and those four minutes though were
mine and i was going
to try that new thing and before the knuckleheads came down and it was just
like that's there's a real
like why don't you come upstairs and say hello it's like but there's a real
brotherly camaraderie to
that because i i do this bit it's not finished i do this bit in my new thing
where i didn't hug anyone
till i was 30. now everyone hugs everyone right growing up you didn't hug your
brother either you
wound each other up you play for you it was the meanest thing you could do and
then you both laughed
and i think i think that's what what makes us as well this this this play
fighting when you're
growing up to be a comic we want to be we want to be heard we want to but i
think there's no nastiness
but there's also there's also a purity in it there's also a filter there's this
is not really
is it it's it's not it's a filter no it was mean it was me i would tell you
something some of the
funniest guys i knew avoided that table like the plague like there was people
they were literally
afraid i saw people people cried i've seen people cried it was me oh really
what really what did they
mean to make him cry though or was it just taken wrong i remember one night a
girl cried enough
they showed up yeah and got in the ring and they got pounded like me if i is my
role there i was the
palooka i was the jerry quarry of that table i had my moments or whatever so i'd
get like a
every once in a while i'd make it to the pay-per-view and i would lose every
time you
couldn't beat patrice patrice was the ali of the table yeah patrice joe frazier
norton there was
just beasts there there was peace and then kevin hart came a few years later
and he caught up real
quick yeah we that little we remember we threw phone books at him when he was
on stage my favorite
thing ever that's not having that's not trying to get kevin hart tried to give
uh charade one night
and charade picked him up and burped him like a baby like threw him over his
shoulder and and charade is
like he's like farm strong like he just came out of the womb could tear a
building out of the ground
he just picked him up and burped him i remember kev's stupid little air jordan's
dangling in the air
and there was nothing which one really lifts you off the ground yeah when there's
a physicality to it
that's different i know it's hard like when i was trying to be serious with my
girl and maybe get
married or move in i remember when i told keith and kevin uh i i i got a joint
bank account with my
girlfriend today oh yeah they literally they drove me i think maybe 10 minutes
past my my stop where i was
staying in like a bad neighborhood and they just said get out i was like what
do you mean they're
like get the out you're an idiot and they made me get out of the car but did
they mean it oh yeah
yeah they didn't come back oh no they never came they don't come back i i had a
walk they didn't mean
it they would have gone around the block or gone down 20 feet no and i had a
newspaper and i remember
they took my newspaper and threw it out the window and i just remember it was
the winter and it was just
going like everywhere and i tried to pick it up because i don't like littering
so i was like trying to
but i was just this in the in the hood trying to pick up newspapers they didn't
mean it in that
they would still call you the next day but they would leave you there yeah so
they it's like they
did and they did the whole thing was a total you can't ironically beat someone
up yeah exactly yeah
you're actually hitting me dude yeah but we don't mean it maybe you are hitting
me i got the bruises
me calling we're driving somewhere to a college and i remember i was drinking
coffee and he was to the
right of me and he just punched me in the side of the head and i spit my coffee
out and it went all
over the inside we almost died i'm not kidding because i couldn't see and i
would kill to see
videos and i was like listen i was like what the he was laughing i've never
seen him he was hysterically
laughing and i'm like i couldn't see and i'm like calling i'm not kidding we
can't we're on the highway
doing 65. i had to stick my head out the window like a dog and then i had to
like pour water it
was a we almost died we almost he was he laughed for 20 minutes well but i i
think i think what's
good okay there's this is what's good obviously it's good and bad in this right
obviously there's
there's bullying which is bad and there's violence and there's murder they're
all bad the fact that i
didn't feel like i could try certain things at at the coming to fact that to
this day i talked about
on your podcast i still have arguments with patrice he's been dead for eight
years i'll do a bit and
i'll feel good about it i'll hear his voice it's in there like a worm yeah just
trashing me going i
see what you're doing you're trying to do this and you think of this but you're
not but that's just in
this and just bam bam bam well there is a survivor of the fittest isn't there i
hope so well there
certainly is is that the fact that you do you still do it and your success
means you you made it you
know there's an obligation i think to i mean it could i think some things were
learned but i think it was
just it was a bunch of broken toys yeah just going at each other that's all it
was it was just like if
like it's like uh a family of kids who were abused the dog yeah and then the
dog bites the family and
it just becomes that thing they still love the dog but the dog is a lunatic
where i remember i remember
a few people i'm not gonna name names i i made really mad because what the way
we played the game
the way it was taught to us that game was it's just like oh yeah hey you dress
like a pregnant woman
and then we would say yeah at least my mother isn't dead like we'd go to that
level yeah yeah yeah like
whoa that was that was so we had to learn yeah but did you do it to people you
didn't like no that's
what i mean yeah we did who see i'm not naming the names come on dude we know
people we don't i'm not
saying people who sat the people who walk by the table oh yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah no i mean if you
sat down and i didn't like you i didn't that's why i i i wouldn't fart and i
wouldn't i don't know
bobby i think you got the rose cuddled lenses in the glasses there dude it was
always how many almost
fights how many actual fights what nearly like you stepped over the mark and
someone wanted to hit
you i don't remember any fights crying almost fight what are you talking about
people i remember one
night keith robinson i forget what the happened but we ended up getting in the
fight over this remote
control and he dug his pimp fingernails into my finger yeah but you loved each
other huh yeah but
you loved each other no i'm just saying you're acting like it never got me no
we did with each
other i almost beat up boss remember me and boss he flipped the whole thing of
chicken wings on me
and the sauce and all over my chest i don't know what's real and what's not
what i'm trying to
ask is in this gang in this gang of like trying to rationalize it there was no
rational i get that
there's no rules and you you say you say terrible things you're going actor on
us you're trying to
get into the character of what's going on that's what he's been doing the whole
time no what no no no
no i'm not all these people no what is it that makes i'm genuinely trying to
work out if if i don't
think anyone ever inside ricky gervais's studio do you know what i mean i don't
think anyone really
wanted to make someone cry or was that like if you did that that was like i'll
give you one example
i'll give you one example that this i remember rich voss was dating this girl
right and they came
to the table we're all there and she sat down and he sat down we all having a
good time we all
busted balls whatever a week later that girl came back by herself because she
had such a great time
last time at the table and she sat down and we all were just sitting there and
then
patrice at one point just looked at it goes excuse me miss hi how are you uh
are you giving boss anybody
oh and she went what and and she goes are you giving boss you you banging boss
she's like no no we're
just we dated a couple he's like okay all right are you anybody here and she's
like we're all laughing
she's laughing no no no and he goes all right well you gotta go you gotta beat
it because you can't
and then and then i think it was keith was like yeah you gotta go you're on you
got donnie brosco in
by rich voss you can't just come here and she was like what and and everybody's
laughing but she was
laughing and then it kept going and going and going yeah and then she turned
away and then she turned
back in tears she goes fine i'll leave she got out the whole restaurant shut
down like quiet and we're
all looking at her and she goes bye and then as soon as she said bye everybody
went
and we all applauded applauded what her crying her her scene that she just did
and then it was like this
badge of honor how how mean you could be and how much you didn't care but that's
not good it was
because that's what we've been trying to tell you no no no no no no no wait
wait wait she's a civilian
yeah but she's not one of you guys that's why yeah but you can't you can't sit
at the table ricky
there's no rules i saw patrice get mad at jim one time and i agreed with jim i
was like why the
is patrice and then that made it even more like unsettling like i don't even
know where the rules are
here yeah like jim was on a date and patrice was was trying to get jim's
attention and jim was so
afraid that patrice was going to say something so rude it was going to up his
for the night
so he's ignoring him and at that time jim was opening for dice on the road so
patrice starts
yelling to jim in this dice character yeah going hey jim let's go to the mall
oh like saying dice would
say on the road to him so we're all dying laughing and the woman he's with is
hearing jim's name and
not seeing jim turn around she's figuring it out and finally jim went over and
said something to
patrice i'm trying to get laid and he went over there and then patrice got mad
yeah and then was
trying to tell me for an hour why he was right and the whole time in my head i
was like no jim's right
yeah you were totally cock blocking him and he wouldn't do that to you and then
it just was like
they and it was basically everybody had their own set of rules everybody is
wrong and everybody's
right there was there was chaos and and that's why it was like it was not it's
not something but
that's but i suppose that that wasn't nice then you didn't like it you didn't
well here's the thing
if if you actually if there were rules then you could know with where the next
thing was coming but
the fact that there was no rules you just sort of yeah no i agree in yeah going
i don't know what's
going to happen yep but the funniest thing about patrice said one night he came
walking in and he
was trying to slink it he was on the whole other side of the olive tree and
then uh patrice
said hey eddie i see something eddie send the blah blah blah and he's seen his
said his thought was
he saw me yeah and then he just knew it was like all right this is going to be
at least 20 minutes
long unless this person walks in not knowing patrice is here or whatever you it's
just literally
bullying it was just schoolyard yeah yeah nothing productive about it yeah no i
i i i disagree with
that there's nothing productive about it i think it was actually i'm just
trying to be about it yeah
it gets romanticized and that's what we did and we all became great it
definitely was a lot of fun
nights it's definitely something i think i agree with all that and then the
other side was it was
very damn like dude you don't know any like the amount of people like because i
used to still play
play the strip yeah there was people used to hide at another comedy club they
wanted to work down
there yeah and wanted to audition but did not want to go through the gauntlet
*sad music*
Oh my god! Uh uh uh...
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh...

Scars From The Boston Roast Culture - Bill Burr & Ricky Gervais

but what was the what was the accusation what was the stick you were giving him
for doing
a corporate sd at the cellar said hey there's some atlanta braves coming up
they were playing
the yankees in the world series they they're taking a bus from their hotel to
yankee stadium
they want somebody to stand up on the bus and we'll give you a world series
ticket and i'm like
yeah it's the easiest gig ever all i gotta do is get on the yankees i could do
that for four
hours no problem right and my buddy did he said it was easy it kind of sucked a
little bit then i got
my ticket and i took off so she they offered it to me and jim norton and jim's
like yeah i don't know
and i was like ah you know i don't know either so then like two days later i
didn't realize jim said
no to it and i started trashing jim and i was getting him so he can pan and he
goes whatever
bus boy and then the whole table stopped and said what he goes bill burr's
gonna do stand up on a
bus for a world series ticket i'm like he got offered it too and it was just it
was over
it was f***ing over it was like i got caught wearing a wire in a mob meeting
it was f***ing they just ripped my shirt open
i almost cried one time i got so hurt by my pounding i was with keith robinson
and patrice in
amsterdam i had bought this outfit for the big show a black shirt polyester
shirt but i bought
there was a time believe it or not what polyester pants were in so i bought
these black pants
what i didn't know is i bought bell bottom i didn't know they were bell bottom
so when i came out it
looked like i was wearing an evening gown i just remember i walked out i didn't
understand and i
walked out and patrice keith were in the van with the windows up but you just
heard patrice's
they smashed me the guy the guy driving who booked the thing it was just
miserable he was laughing so
hard he had to pull the van over oh no that and they were just smashing me and
i just had my head
because i had to perform in this i had no i had to go on stage with this outfit
you were dressed like
cat woman this is like trauma this is like trauma i i was just i was taking it
but i wanted to like
just cry a little bit you know what's funny when you say that that's trauma is
there's a lot of truth
to that because like those are the funniest guys i ever hung out with and
rather than sitting down
and writing a script and shooting something for like five years all we did was
try to sabotage each
other every possible thing but there would be times i would i like i really
wanted to try something out
i would i just didn't have it in me that night i had a tough day i would skip
going upstairs
i would wait till right before my spot i'd catch the host out on the sidewalk
and i would go downstairs
and then i would go on stage knowing full well that i was i got a good four
minutes before they
see me on that tv and then they're all going to stand in the doorway mean mugging
me shaking their
head at everything i say like it's not funny and those four minutes though were
mine and i was going
to try that new thing and before the knuckleheads came down and it was just
like that's there's a real
like why don't you come upstairs and say hello it's like but there's a real
brotherly camaraderie to
that because i i do this bit it's not finished i do this bit in my new thing
where i didn't hug anyone
till i was 30. now everyone hugs everyone right growing up you didn't hug your
brother either you
wound each other up you play for you it was the meanest thing you could do and
then you both laughed
and i think i think that's what what makes us as well this this this play
fighting when you're
growing up to be a comic we want to be we want to be heard we want to but i
think there's no nastiness
but there's also there's also a purity in it there's also a filter there's this
is not really
is it it's it's not it's a filter no it was mean it was me i would tell you
something some of the
funniest guys i knew avoided that table like the plague like there was people
they were literally
afraid i saw people people cried i've seen people cried it was me oh really
what really what did they
mean to make him cry though or was it just taken wrong i remember one night a
girl cried enough
they showed up yeah and got in the ring and they got pounded like me if i is my
role there i was the
palooka i was the jerry quarry of that table i had my moments or whatever so i'd
get like a
every once in a while i'd make it to the pay-per-view and i would lose every
time you
couldn't beat patrice patrice was the ali of the table yeah patrice joe frazier
norton there was
just beasts there there was peace and then kevin hart came a few years later
and he caught up real
quick yeah we that little we remember we threw phone books at him when he was
on stage my favorite
thing ever that's not having that's not trying to get kevin hart tried to give
uh charade one night
and charade picked him up and burped him like a baby like threw him over his
shoulder and and charade is
like he's like farm strong like he just came out of the womb could tear a
building out of the ground
he just picked him up and burped him i remember kev's stupid little air jordan's
dangling in the air
and there was nothing which one really lifts you off the ground yeah when there's
a physicality to it
that's different i know it's hard like when i was trying to be serious with my
girl and maybe get
married or move in i remember when i told keith and kevin uh i i i got a joint
bank account with my
girlfriend today oh yeah they literally they drove me i think maybe 10 minutes
past my my stop where i was
staying in like a bad neighborhood and they just said get out i was like what
do you mean they're
like get the out you're an idiot and they made me get out of the car but did
they mean it oh yeah
yeah they didn't come back oh no they never came they don't come back i i had a
walk they didn't mean
it they would have gone around the block or gone down 20 feet no and i had a
newspaper and i remember
they took my newspaper and threw it out the window and i just remember it was
the winter and it was just
going like everywhere and i tried to pick it up because i don't like littering
so i was like trying to
but i was just this in the in the hood trying to pick up newspapers they didn't
mean it in that
they would still call you the next day but they would leave you there yeah so
they it's like they
did and they did the whole thing was a total you can't ironically beat someone
up yeah exactly yeah
you're actually hitting me dude yeah but we don't mean it maybe you are hitting
me i got the bruises
me calling we're driving somewhere to a college and i remember i was drinking
coffee and he was to the
right of me and he just punched me in the side of the head and i spit my coffee
out and it went all
over the inside we almost died i'm not kidding because i couldn't see and i
would kill to see
videos and i was like listen i was like what the he was laughing i've never
seen him he was hysterically
laughing and i'm like i couldn't see and i'm like calling i'm not kidding we
can't we're on the highway
doing 65. i had to stick my head out the window like a dog and then i had to
like pour water it
was a we almost died we almost he was he laughed for 20 minutes well but i i
think i think what's
good okay there's this is what's good obviously it's good and bad in this right
obviously there's
there's bullying which is bad and there's violence and there's murder they're
all bad the fact that i
didn't feel like i could try certain things at at the coming to fact that to
this day i talked about
on your podcast i still have arguments with patrice he's been dead for eight
years i'll do a bit and
i'll feel good about it i'll hear his voice it's in there like a worm yeah just
trashing me going i
see what you're doing you're trying to do this and you think of this but you're
not but that's just in
this and just bam bam bam well there is a survivor of the fittest isn't there i
hope so well there
certainly is is that the fact that you do you still do it and your success
means you you made it you
know there's an obligation i think to i mean it could i think some things were
learned but i think it was
just it was a bunch of broken toys yeah just going at each other that's all it
was it was just like if
like it's like uh a family of kids who were abused the dog yeah and then the
dog bites the family and
it just becomes that thing they still love the dog but the dog is a lunatic
where i remember i remember
a few people i'm not gonna name names i i made really mad because what the way
we played the game
the way it was taught to us that game was it's just like oh yeah hey you dress
like a pregnant woman
and then we would say yeah at least my mother isn't dead like we'd go to that
level yeah yeah yeah like
whoa that was that was so we had to learn yeah but did you do it to people you
didn't like no that's
what i mean yeah we did who see i'm not naming the names come on dude we know
people we don't i'm not
saying people who sat the people who walk by the table oh yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah no i mean if you
sat down and i didn't like you i didn't that's why i i i wouldn't fart and i
wouldn't i don't know
bobby i think you got the rose cuddled lenses in the glasses there dude it was
always how many almost
fights how many actual fights what nearly like you stepped over the mark and
someone wanted to hit
you i don't remember any fights crying almost fight what are you talking about
people i remember one
night keith robinson i forget what the happened but we ended up getting in the
fight over this remote
control and he dug his pimp fingernails into my finger yeah but you loved each
other huh yeah but
you loved each other no i'm just saying you're acting like it never got me no
we did with each
other i almost beat up boss remember me and boss he flipped the whole thing of
chicken wings on me
and the sauce and all over my chest i don't know what's real and what's not
what i'm trying to
ask is in this gang in this gang of like trying to rationalize it there was no
rational i get that
there's no rules and you you say you say terrible things you're going actor on
us you're trying to
get into the character of what's going on that's what he's been doing the whole
time no what no no no
no i'm not all these people no what is it that makes i'm genuinely trying to
work out if if i don't
think anyone ever inside ricky gervais's studio do you know what i mean i don't
think anyone really
wanted to make someone cry or was that like if you did that that was like i'll
give you one example
i'll give you one example that this i remember rich voss was dating this girl
right and they came
to the table we're all there and she sat down and he sat down we all having a
good time we all
busted balls whatever a week later that girl came back by herself because she
had such a great time
last time at the table and she sat down and we all were just sitting there and
then
patrice at one point just looked at it goes excuse me miss hi how are you uh
are you giving boss anybody
oh and she went what and and she goes are you giving boss you you banging boss
she's like no no we're
just we dated a couple he's like okay all right are you anybody here and she's
like we're all laughing
she's laughing no no no and he goes all right well you gotta go you gotta beat
it because you can't
and then and then i think it was keith was like yeah you gotta go you're on you
got donnie brosco in
by rich voss you can't just come here and she was like what and and everybody's
laughing but she was
laughing and then it kept going and going and going yeah and then she turned
away and then she turned
back in tears she goes fine i'll leave she got out the whole restaurant shut
down like quiet and we're
all looking at her and she goes bye and then as soon as she said bye everybody
went
and we all applauded applauded what her crying her her scene that she just