Name: The Jeselnik & Rosenthal Vanity Project / Dig Your Teeth Into It (Full Eps. 233)
Uploaded: 2024-02-07T17:00:10.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Jeselnik & Rosenthal Vanity Project / Dig Your Teeth Into It (Full Eps. 233)' from Anthony Jeselnik on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-02-07. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Jeselnik & Rosenthal Vanity Project / Dig Your Teeth Into It (Full Eps. 233)' from Anthony Jeselnik on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-02-07. Transcript available.

The Jeselnik & Rosenthal Vanity Project / Dig Your Teeth Into It (Full Eps. 233)

rolling oh yeah thank you to our sponsor hymns you're confident in the office
at the dinner
table even on the dance floor but can you keep it going when you get back to
the bedroom start
your free online visit today at hymns.com slash jrvp that's h-i-m-s.com slash jrvp
for your
personalized ed treatment options hymns.com slash jrvp restrictions apply see
website for details
and important safety information valentine's day coming up if you want to show
your loved ones
how much you love them give them a gift of trade coffee this valentine season
right now through
february 14th trade is offering 10 off gift subscriptions when you use the code
jrvp10
at checkout that's jrvp10 to receive 10 off gift subscriptions use the code jrvp10
finally if you only have a 401k you're not getting the most for retirement add
an ira then boost it
by three percent with robin hood and if you transfer in any retirement account
you get three percent on
top of that there's no limit to the match robin hood gold gets you the biggest
contribution match
of any ira on the market sign up for robin hood gold at robin hood.com slash
boost by april 30th
subscription fees apply and now for some legal info investing involves risk
three percent match requires
gold for one year from first match must keep ira for five years match on
transfers subject to
additional terms and conditions robin hood financial llc member s-i-p-c
uh three pre-rolls you know just warming me up on this rainy day to talk a
little bit about a
child's birthday party gone wrong uh another youtube decapitation and uh
writing the nfl script all
coming up in episode 233 of the jeselnick and rosenthal vanity project jrvp
junior vice president
you saying the blaine and hawkins were killed by a fucking lizard that's a
bullshit psych job
there are two or three men out there at most fucking lizard
well we got a live one today we got a fired up jeseltron aaron do you know what
my quote's from
i know greg does not that's from predator that's right that's right that's from
predator
predator i just looked i just looked up carl weathers predator quotes and i
picked one at random
and i knew it was going to be awesome carl weathers people talk about him from
rocky
he's been getting a lot of heat from arrested development which he was great in
of course he was
amazing and happy gilmore but i'm here today to remember the guy who was in
predator
and he held his own on the screen rest in peace carl weathers you were amazing
because of predator
why were you so confident i wouldn't know it because i don't think you've seen
the movie predator yeah i
haven't but i kind of consider myself the carl weathers of uh the jessel nick
and rosenthal vanity
project jrvp junior vice president that's high praise for you yes sneaky
athletic uh he was in the nfl
you know i played tennis you're like you're the bill duke of the jessel nick
and rosenthal vanity project
jrvp junior vice president that's who you are i just mean i'm i'm coming in
here with schwarzenegger
every week and i'm holding my own aaron guess who you are the predator you're jesse
ventura
you're jesse ventura i'm arnold schwarzenegger greg is bill duke billy is the
native american guy
who sacrifices himself for no reason billy yeah it literally yeah yeah um and
al madrigal is the guy
who gets killed pretty early on he's got glasses he's the famous screenwriter
shane black shane black
yeah they wanted to write he was like i'm not gonna write they killed him off
that's who al madrigal is
and and there's one latino guy yeah but he doesn't he doesn't really count who's
the girl
who's the girl that doesn't speak any english uh miss kim yeah okay i would
okay i would have said i
also would have gone with jordy okay for for that one but carl weathers was
great thank you carl
weathers for everything um we i had a good week uh i've got two weeks off now i've
been i was going
hard at the beginning of the year i've got two weeks off i'm excited about that
do a couple sets
at the store here and there so i don't build up any rust but i'm excited uh
this past weekend i had
albuquerque phoenix and uh a casino outside of tucson let me go ahead and say
uh anyway
albuquerque was amazing i love cities like albuquerque where they're just like
really happy
that you came there albuquerque is cool they've got cool stuff cool people but
the people just
seemed very happy that i was there was this big ass theater they have and i
really enjoyed it like
the the shots of the crowd if you follow me on instagram you see the pictures
liz takes
people the the crowd is cool in albuquerque we had a great show there and i was
like this is maybe
the most fun show i've had all year and then phoenix was so insane blew it out
of the water
made me think albuquerque who albuquerque what i actually said that on stage
several times
uh but phoenix it was in the round it's if you've seen nate bargazzi's latest
special if you've seen
tom segura's latest special it's at the same place the celebrity center in phoenix
it's in the round
and i was like oh this is annoying you've got to turn while you're up there and
then you walk out
on stage and it's like fucking thunderdome in there both shows were so insane
it was absolutely
crazy that i i loved it uh the pictures were great we uh we had a great time in
phoenix although my
favorite uh thrift store this is all about thrift stores and we go on the road
i hate them i don't
give a shit maybe i'll try on a pair of jeans maybe but your leather jackets
aren't all that
and i'm not digging through a bunch of t-shirts looking for one of a band i
know that fits me
i'm not doing it but there's one in phoenix called heart of the city they just
opened the last time i was
in phoenix phoenix is the only city on the toll tour that i've gone back to i
did the clubs in the
beginning it was so much fun let me go back uh but last time i was there i went
to heart of the city
it was incredible everything in there was something that i would want to own it
was very very cool and
then we went back uh while i was there listening a couple hours before the show
like let's go to
heart of the city we walked from our hotel and it's been closed for two months
because of water damage
heart of the city get a wet vac it's it's you got concrete floors it shouldn't
be that hard to
clean up the water open back up i want to go to you
now i got a couple weeks off there's a lot of time on heart of the city heart
of the city is good
that's close i was excited it's gonna open back up at some point i wish it had
been while i was there
but i would go back just for that um this week though i'm just excited to relax
run some errands
i was trying to get some sun i was looking at myself in the mirror before i go
on stage
i'm pale i'm real pale i haven't been out in the sun very much at all and it's
pouring rain all week
i'm not going to get to see the sun at all aaron no not at all you don't have
any flooding issues or
anything going on at your apartment around you that's that's the penthouse you
know sometimes you
get some leaks but you never get any any flooding you know i haven't had any
leaks in quite some time
thank you for fixing that over several years since i've bought the condo um no
it's great
i like if rummy gets free baths when he goes in the rain he's very soft he's
been very sweet very
cuddly but i do have to take him to the vet a couple weeks ago you'll remember
i tried to take
him to the vet it was a fail i gotta double the medication so uh tomorrow night
i'm gonna give
meds late at night wake him up in the morning give him a little more meds carry
him into the vet
and hope it goes well but that's my uh that's my thing why why are you so fired
up i mean you came
in here the door was locked that is a bad start this is our last show in the
building in the all
things comedy original building slash studios it's empty out there this is the
original building the
bill burr built without magical with their two hands and now they're getting
rid of it aaron is the
place we're going to next week better or worse better are we the last podcast
to tape in here no
why not uh it's a show called the pork report and you didn't want to have
something a little more
appropriate to kind of close this down i don't i don't get to plan that far aaron's
been wearing
a tuxedo all week that's true because of this and because of carl weathers but
you came in off
you came in all fired up at one point you were like yelling at us uh to get
going even though you
were the last one to get here um yeah we could have started earlier greg here's
some carl weathers
trivia carl weathers dressed up like uncle sam and sang an entire james brown
song before he was
beaten to death by dolph lundgren in what movie kickboxer rocky four wait i
should have known
that of course of course he was beaten to death in front of thousands of people
in an exhibition
after doing an entire james brown song people are going to get on me for that
because i have seen
rocky four multiple times and to get that wrong seems tough but put yourself in
the hot seat it's not as
easy like answering the questions for jeopardy when you're actually on the show
that's what everybody
says i've done some quiz shows just on podcasts and it is harder how was your
week before i before i
tell you why i'm so hype okay um i was pretty hype i on the way here i found
out i'm not getting kicked
out of my house so i honestly feel like the celtics just won the championship
or something why would you
tell your house uh our old the old owner of it was mysterious who even owned
this it was like some
sort of consortium like some business and then someone died and then they were
like we're selling
the house uh but we can't tell you anything about it i was like oh that doesn't
sound good yeah um
and you've been there how long only a year and then they sold it to a
restaurant group i was like oh this
this sounds even worse why would a restaurant group be buying a house but but
today on the way here i found
out it all makes sense it shares the property with the rest it doesn't matter
we're staying they're not
raising the rent they all sound very professional uh nice guy he he was a
listener my other podcast so
that that's uh a credit to him okay and uh it's just a big relief i did not
want to have to get
kicked out and moved i'm all it also would have been a bad look for me i'm on
team rent um everyone
else is team team buy a house it's a great investment blah blah blah uh i'm
still team rent i'm sticking
with team rent even though i don't necessarily have to i don't care i think it's
better it's easier
how long is your lease like when can they raise your rent you know they're
always like okay said
he wasn't gonna uh they just in la they're just going forever when it comes to
los angeles real
estate uh if they tell you something it's a done deal uh i thought your part of
town has rent control
that that is true so it could only go up so much it's a good point um i've kind
of enjoyed the the i'm i
kind of enjoyed on sunday being forced to stay inside uh it almost feels like
there's a pressure
living in los angeles especially with with kids that like you always have to go
out it's nice outside
go out make make use of the day it's nice relief to just kind of sit around and
watch nonsense yeah
i've enjoyed coloring up the good book watching a little tv listen i'm excited
okay i'm excited but
my excitement's been tempered a little bit by what greg just said about having
to rent a house
and not owning a house okay greg and i host a podcast he shouldn't be in a
position where he has
to rent a home we should be millionaires and greg's i don't want to blow you up
a little bit greg's
not a millionaire am i a millionaire of course i am okay this isn't about me
this is about us greg and
because we host a podcast we are entitled to all of your money yeah we make
money from the podcast yes
we do have ads and we're grateful for those but it's not en